Did you know God drives a truck?
It's big and silver and 4X4,
though I doubt He ever uses it.
It even has it's own parking space at work-
right next to the Handicapped parking of all things.

*convenient?*

God enjoys meddling.
Especially in our mundane everyday affairs.
This is not a theological commentary -
God is a "superior" being...I guess...

God is very, uh...precise?
He loves to show us the error of our ways...
He knows everything, apparently..
Or at least so he enlightens us almost every day.

Did you know God is not wise on the ways of ordering annuals?
He has a penchant for petunias and potentillas...
both of which get very ugly and repetitious every time one sees them.
Kinda like something else we know of...

Did you know that God has a pig voice?
And kind of a piggish little nose?
So, if God looks and talks like a pig,
does that make pigs divine?

God drives a truck to work. 
And it's a Ford.  Of all things.
WHY, GOD, WHY?!?!?! 
A  FORD.
Good grief.

My spork, my spork,
is wonderful
My spork, my spork,
is great.
My spork, my spork,
is handy
My spork:  it lets me eat cake.

My spoon, my spoon,
is curvy
My spoon, my spoon,
it shines.
My spoon, my spoon,
is dirty
My spoon:  there is no spoon.

My knife, my knife,
is pointy
My knife, my knife,
is sharp (not).
My knife, my knife,
is skinny
My knife could cut up a carp (not).

This ode, this ode,
is over
This ode, this ode,
is done.
I know that my airplane utensils
will always provide lots of fun.  Yeah!

February 18 2000