Teeny-Bopper Brittney Thoughts


A commentary by CB member Ivy Orth


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"Don't you just think Justin looks soooo hot in that new video? Omigosh like totally! Hee hee hee! And like wow, did you see Brittany's cute new outfit at last night's concert? Like, wow, if only I was a size zero, gee, I'd totally strut my stuff and act like a total idiot dumb blonde and show I've got nothing to offer but a bad influence and cheesy smile, too!"

Okay, lemme start again.

So a huge pop star comes out with yet another new hairstyle, new outfit, or new glutimus maximus for all we must expect. Where are you going to see its influence, of course, but the fans, and the fans of the fans?
"Like totally! Michelle came to school yesterday wearing a cute shirt which was like exactly like that one Brittany wore at her last concert!"
"You mean that see-through halter top?"
"Yeah, the principal sent her home, can you believe it?"
"No way! How mean!"
"Yeah. She's got no sense of fashion. She only wishes she could wear that miniskirt you are wearing!"
"She's just jealous I look more like Brittany than she does!"

So maybe I'm overdoing it, right? Exaggerating? No, not really. I've seen it all happen, the way the fashion fad blooms and dies, how it spreads like a plague. Like, okay. Monday Morning the "Popular" girl with every Brittany Spears song memorized, and all her posters comes to school with let's say, butterfly clips in her hair; baby blue ones. Her closest fans comment on "oh, how cute!" and how much they make her look just like Brittany, with her hair in those pigtails. Soon, they all have them. So of course unpopular girls, who try to act like Brittany but maybe don't follow the fad quite as religiously, immediately copy the pigtail and butterfly thing. But they're sneered down apon, for that was so "last week" and now Brittany's style's the set of pink butterfly clips.
And yet they say they just want to dress how they feel comfortable! And how they feel pretty. Well, maybe they wouldn't have to think they're only pretty when they look like Brittany, that is, if she put off a more independent influence. But no, she could never do that. The whole pledge of herself and her teeny-bopper followers is, of course, the essence of mainstream conformity.

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