MAGILLA: Yes, I won.

[Cut to outside Dr. Brown's office. Edna is working on her motorcycle. Irv approaches with some lunch.]

IRV: Hey. I brought you a chicken Parmesan. I thought you might be hungry.

EDNA: Hey watch it now; you're spilling tomato sauce all over my drill bits.

IRV: I'll just set it over here for you. Guess what. It looks like they may not be tearing down the kissing bridge, after all.

EDNA: And why wouldn't they tear it down?

IRV: Because I went down to the City Council meeting and asked them not to.

EDNA: Why in the world would you do a thing like that, has your brain gone AWOL?

IRV: Now, look here, woman. I don't know what you want from me.

EDNA: I don't want anything. I can't believe you'd go in to a City Council meeting. Who do you think you are?

IRV: Your husband. And the last time I checked, it was well within a husband's right to try to cheer up his grouch of a wife.

EDNA: In the first place, if I needed cheering up, I would rent Terminator like I always do. Second, I don't give a damn about that old bridge.

IRV: You certainly acted like you did the other day. A-and now you've busted out your tool kit. I know something's bugging you.

EDNA: You don't know diddlysquat!

[She grabs her jacket and leaves.]

IRV: Where you going now?

EDNA: To the video store!

[Cut to the Abbott home at night. The family is sitting at dinner.]

ROSE: Have you decided who you're asking to the fall dance this year, Amy?

[Bright giggles.]

AMY: It's not funny, Jackass.

DR. ABBOTT: Amy. Language.

BRIGHT: What is the big deal? It's not like you're gonna ask him anyways.

AMY: That's not the point, Bright. Besides, you don't know that for a fact.

BRIGHT: Oh, so you would've asked him? Well... you'd better thank me then 'cause I probably saved your entire reputation.

DR. ABBOTT: You would've asked who, what? What are we talking about?

AMY: Nothing. I'm not asking anybody to the dance, OK? Let's just change the subject.

ROSE: Sweetheart, Colin wouldn't want you to sit home alone...

AMY: Can we just drop it, please?

[They sit in silence for a moment.]

DR. ABBOTT: Well... Um, I have an announcement to make. Due to your mother's warped sense of humor, I'm going to be hosting a sex education assembly at your high school this week. I realize this may be a bit uncomfortable for the both of you, especially considering the highly sensitive subject matter, which is why I wanted to open it up to a family discussion. Any thoughts?

[Bright motions with his fork that his father is crazy.]

DR. ABBOTT: Amy?

AMY: Is this 'cause Susie Clark got a VD?

[Dr. Abbott just about chokes on his food.]

ROSE: How do you know about Susie Clark?

AMY: Everybody knows.

BRIGHT: I didn't know.

AMY: How could you not know? You dated her.

[Dr. Abbott chokes again.]

BRIGHT: That was a million years ago. That was back when Francie was still in the picture.

DR. ABBOTT: Francie? Francie who?