|
"Beer
is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
Benjamin Franklin.
"He
was a wise man who invented beer."
-Plato.
"My advice to you is to get married.
If you find a good wife, you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a
philosopher." -Socrates.
"Sure,
everyone always said 'Socrates what is the meaning of life?' or
'Socrates how can I find happiness?', did anyone ever say 'Socrates
hemlock is poison.'???????" -Socrates
right before his death
"Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it
seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems
like a minute. That's relativity." -Einstein
"Always
do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth
shut."
-Ernest Hemmingway.
"Don't
knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love."
-Woody Allen.
"Giving
up smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I know because I've done it
thousands of times." -Mark
Twain"
"Once you can accept the
universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes
with plaid comes easy."
--Albert Einstein
I can resist everything
except temptation."
-Oscar Wilde.
"You can tell German
wine from vinegar by the label."
-Mark Twain.
"An
intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools."
-Ernest Hemingway (For Whom the Bell Tolls).
"If it sells, it's art."
-Frank Lloyd Wright.
"They
spell it Vinci and pronounce it Vinchy; foreigners always spell better than
they pronounce." -Mark Twain
"The holy passion of
friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it
will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money."
-Mark Twain
"Last week I stated
that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been
visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement. "
-Mark Twain
"What would men be
without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce." -Mark
Twain
"Wagner's music is
better than it sounds." -Mark Twain |