"Look, glucosamine and chondroitin is a lot cheaper for dogs!"

MOONA LISA -- A CLASSIC PITCHER (On a Clover truck)

"We're pushing to get into the whole construction market so we've put together a marketing package."

Come for some fruit, get some history

east and west it's all around
Crow Creek in the middle can be found
It can be yours, how does that sound?
(Burma-Shave style signs by a real estate agent)

"I think I'm just going to have to buy this hat"

Can you find your way out?
I don't know, I think so.

Wok'n Roll, and Mulan Wok, two restaurants.

Licking the Cutting Board doesn't count as cleaning it.

Till now you have been adrift in the harbor of my patience. --Lilo and Stitch

"Well, I'm out of town for the next two weeks so you're on your own."

"There's the chicken! I found the chicken."

"It's right in the consistency of Jello."

Voting says, I'm a decision maker. It also says I just cancelled out my dad's vote. (banner ad from yourvotecounts.org on a campus newspaper.)

"You know the drummer -- his son married one of the stars."

"We had to change next week and the week after next. We're finally going to --- we've tried so many times."

"I don't know how to get there but I know which house it is."

Real Californians don't do laundry -- till after 7 pm.

VeeDub Motorworks

"She had to take an antidepressant."

"When I'm older and I have money I'm going to buy two churches so when this one burns down they'll have one."

Do you really think it's hot here? ---God.

"He walks around a little bit, but he doesn't do anything. Last night I was running around doing the dinner, the laundry, and oh the peaches, I spent hours on the peaches. I asked if he could get the laundry when it buzzed and he couldn't."

"I'm getting used to my new glasses. We went to the movie today and I kept thinking, 'oh, God, I can't SEE!'"

"He's 45 years old."

"3 more semesters, 2 more semesters at Community, then the internships. Speech pathology."

"My husband had a coloscopy done. He went to see a gastronomist, less than 5 minutes, $90."

"One of these days I'm going to get my Girl's Life magazine because, you know, I did that poem."

read on a website: "cutting your nose off despite you face."