GroupQuotes

Ross: I told mom and dad last night, and they seemed to take it pretty well.
Monica: Oh really, so that hysterical phone call I got from a woman sobbing at 3AM, "I'll never have any grandchildren, I'll never have any grandchildren!" was what? A wrong number?

Ross: Rach, did you proofread these?
Rachel: Uh... yeah, why?
Ross: Uh, nothing, I'm sure they'll be impressed with your excellent compuper skills.
Rachel: Oh my god! Do you think it's on all of them?
Joey: Oh no, I'm sure the XEROX machine caught a few.

Monica: Oh my god, the cat's made my eyes water! Don't... don't throw it to me! My vision has been compromised! Oh god! Okay..Okay...it's okay. Man, that was close.
Chandler: Yeah, you almost overreacted to something.

Monica: So, maybe I am a little high maintenance. And maybe Rachel is a little bit of a pushover. But you know what we decided you are?
Rachel: Yes, we are very sorry to tell you this, but you, Phoebe, are flaky.
Monica: Hah!
Phoebe: That's true, I'm flaky.
Rachel: So, what, you're just... your'e just okay with being flaky?
Phoebe: Yeah, totally.
Monica: Well, then I'm okay with being high maintenance.
Rachel: Yeah, and I'm okay with being a pushover.
Phoebe: That's great, good for you guys.
Monica: I am not high maintenance!
Rachel: I am not a pushover!
Phoebe: Who said you were?
Monica/Rachel: You did!
Phoebe: Oh, I'm flaky. I'll say anything.

Joey: The allergy guy got the part, thanks.
Chandler: Well, maybe, we could fix it, y'know, maybe we could send, some, some big, big flowers to scare him away.

Phoebe: His 1st big kid's bike, this is so exciting!
Monica: Oh yeah, I remember mine! Ohh, it was my sixth birthday, my dad took me to the park, I got it...and it bent.

Rachel: Oh look! Look! Phoebe's talking to uh, Cute Coffeehouse Guy!
Ross: Oh, you guys call him, "Cute Coffeehouse Guy." We call him, "Hums While He Pees".
Chandler: Yes, and we call Ross, "Lingers In The Bathroom".

Chandler: Are you okay?
Monica: I'm fine now, but it was really scary there for a while. I mean, someone slipped a threatening note under the door.
Joey: Oh yeah, sorry about that. Mob mentality or whatever, I don't know....

Phoebe: It's amazing! My headache's completely gone! What are those pills called?
Monica: Hexadrin.
Phoebe: Oh! I love you Hexadrin! (kisses the box, and pulls out a paper) Oh look! It comes with a story!
Monica: No Phoebe, those are, like, the side-effects, and stuff.
Phoebe: Say what?
Monica: You know, the possible side-effects.
Phoebe: OH MY GOD! Dizziness, nervousness, drowsiness, facial swelling, nausea, headache... HEADACHE! Vomiting, stomach bleeding, liver damage! Now, okay, I don't recall any of this coming up when you gave me those little death capsules! Oh, I'm sorry, EXTRA-DEATH CAPSULES!

Monica: This is me in "The Sound of Music". You see the Von Trapp kids?
Phoebe: (looks) No..
Monica: That's because I'm in front of them.
Chandler: I thought that was an alp.

Rachel: I was laughed out of twelve interviews today.
Chandler: And yet you're surprisingly upbeat.
Rachel: Well, you would be, too, if you found Joan and David boots on sale fifty precent off.
Chandler: Oh how well you do know me.

Joey: It's never gonna happen.
Ross: What?
Joey: You and Rachel
Ross: Wha...Me and Ra...? You think I... Wha...? Why not?
Joey: Because you waited too long to make your move, and now you're in the "Friend Zone"
Ross: No, no, no. I'm not in the Zone.
Joey: Ross, you're mayor of the Zone.

Phoebe: Okay. We haven't known eachother for that long a time. And there are three things you should know about me. One, my friends are the most important thing in my life. Two, I never lie. And three, I make the best oatmeal-raisin cookies in the world.
Rachel: Okay thanks Pheebs. Why haven't I tasted these before?
Phoebe: Well, I don't make them a lot. Because I don't think it's fair to the other cookies.