All You Pretty Things - suck glam candy

This is where we house past Recommended Allowances. Take daily with water. Do not drive heavy machinary while under the influence of these products, unless the product in question is heavy machinary. Demeter* Man Who Sold the World* Iggy Pop Glitter-T Performance MAY 5.18.01_R.A. 4.0 Recommended Allowance 4.0 ***Demeter Fragrance Product Type: Perfume/Bath Products Price: $14-18 Get it: @ Demeter OR @ your local hip boutique
This shit is weird. Demeter makes something like 200 single-scent and mixed-scent perfumes that smell like... er... things... or memories... or places. They don't make alien blends with names like Tresome or Charlie Go Lightly, they make concentrated evocative scents like
Tomato, Grass, Sawdust, Whisky Tobacco, Riding Crop, Dust, Laundromat, Funeral Parlour, Cucumber, Gin and Tonic, Vinyl, Rye Bread, Altoids, Condensed Milk, Dregs, Glue, Earthworm, Holy Water, Sushi, and Waffle (yeah, they also have flowers like Damusk Rose and Geranium and everything else, but who cares!) The best thing is that these aren't just generic perfume with a hint of Rubber or Fireplace scent - they smell EXACTLY like their name! It's like they had one of those Willy Wonka machines where you shove ashes and wood and smoke and a metal poker and then a raging fire into the big end, and it comes out as a little vial of Essence of Fireplace. If you've ever been to a boutique that carries these scents, the salespeople have a look of pure exhaustion, because once you try one scent, you have to try all of them. Admittedly, some of the scents are much better for the home than your body, but always try it on, even the weirdest scent can meld with your body scent in a wonderous way, Earthworm was a great suprise (no fucking kidding!). And because most of the scents are non-floral, they can all be worn by men and women! My personal collection includes Dirt, Freesia, Snow, Earl Grey, Pruning Shears, Dandelion and Gingerale. I really like the garden ones (can you tell?), my favorite used to be Dandelion, but now it's Gingerale, which is suprisingly not too sweet, it's dry, just like the Seagram's ads. But the freakiest thing is that it actually smells like carbonation !!!!! Totally creepy! BTW, I think Gingerale is the most glam scent because it's witty and sparkly and effervescent, but there's also the alchohol scents like Martini and G, and the kinky scents like Vinyl, Rubber, and Leather. All the scents come in Cologne spray, and most also come in bath oil, bath salt, bath gel, and lotion. They have cool gift sets like Virtual Garden, Virtual Boyfriend, Virtual Ski Lodge, etc, that feature evocative combos. They even have an "anti-aromatherapy" line that features a food-scent lotion that "may just make you feel better, or maybe not..." Honey for Bitterness, Cinammon Toast for Manic, Brownie for Neverhappy, the fabulous Gingerale for Depleted etc... New scents are being added all the time, on deck are New Money, Old Money, Pet Shop, Tool Shed, Paperback, and mmmm Gasoline! They way this is going, and at fifteen bucks a pop, you can wear a new scent every freakin day of the year. 5.04.01_R.A. 3.0 Recommended Allowance 3.0 *Man Who Sold the world by David Bowie Product Type: Album Price: $8 - 13 Get it: @ Amazon OR @ your local record store
What was going through the man's head? Who can say. Released in 1971, David's third album was an oddish re-vision of the 60s, bits of festival-rock raucousness and prog-rock pretension are jellied up and staked on a pike - only one album away from Ziggy's Glam with a capital "G", it's still all queered and disconcerting. It's also, most say thankfully, a messy but final farewell to any earlier attempt at hippy appeal. One fan's opinion of course, but the songs with messages - "Savior Machine" "Running Gun Blues" are wince-y, but even the mystically-inclined tracks have become seriously perverted. With a couple of exceptions, the tracks are superlative, quixotic offerings - some of the hardest rock Bowie's ever taken in hand, filled with sexual provocation and provocative poetics. Certainly one of the darker albums of the early days, created before the harmony (snigger) of family life made everything Hunky Dory (though that album has it's own profound moments of gravity and depravity, but that's another discussion for another day.) Not neccesarily the best place to start for the Bowie-curious, but a definite must for those who are already intrigued and/or serious fans. Though if you consider yourself a serious fan and you don't already own this album, you should be ashamed. The pic on the right represents the various and sundry strange covers printed for this album. The infamous David-in-a-frock cover will live forever since it made the Ryko re-release and was neatly mimicked in Velvet Goldmine (our frock pic isn't great, but you get an eyeful of something better). But it's not too hard to find the second two on vinyl - the last one is a rarity. For a closer look at the covers and more info go to the fantabulous Teenage Wildlife hubsite.
One last sidenote: don't know if this happened anywhere else, but when I saw the Outside tour a few years ago, it was only about a year after Nirvana did a wonderful cover of the title track on this album, and apparently there was some kind of odd cultural feud between Nirvana fans and NIN fans, so when Bowie started to play the song, the spotty psuedo-suicidal IGNORANT virgins who were only there to cream over the admittedly very-talented Mr. Reznor started booing. I would've kicked some ass, but I threw out my steel-toed Doc Martins in high school, thank you very much. Songs All songs written by David Bowie The Width Of A Circle All The Madmen Black Country Rock After All Running Gun Blues Saviour Machine She Shook Me Cold The Man Who Sold The World The Supermen Bonus tracks on RykoDisc release Lightning Frightening Holy Holy Moonage Daydream Hang Onto Yourself Width of a Circle David Bowie In the corner of the morning in the past I would sit and blame the master first and last All the roads were straight and narrow And the prayers were small and yellow And the rumour spread that I was aging fast Then I ran across a monster who was sleeping By a tree. And I looked and frowned and the monster was me Well, I said hello and I said hello And I asked "Why not?" and I replied "I don't know" So we asked a simple black bird, who was happy as can be And he laughed insane and quipped "KAHLIL GIBRAN" So I cried for all the others till the day was nearly through For I realized that God's a young man too So I said "So long" and I waved "Bye-bye" And I smashed my soul and traded my mind Got laid by a young bordello I was vaguely half asleep For which my reputation swept back home in drag And the moral of this magic spell Negotiates my hide When God did take my logic for a ride (Riding along) Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh He swallowed his pride and puckered his lips And showed me the leather belt round his hips My knees were shaking my cheeks aflame He said "You'll never go down to the Gods again" (Turn around,go back!) He struck the ground a cavern appeared And I smelt the burning pit of fear We crashed a thousand yards below I said "Do it again, do it again" (Turn around,go back!) His nebulous body swayed above His tongue swollen with devil's love The snake and I, a venom high I said "Do it again, do it again" (Turn around, go back!) Breathe, breathe, breathe deeply And I was seething, breathing deeply Spitting sentry, horned and tailed Waiting for you Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh APRIL 4.19.01__R.A. 2.0 Recommended Allowance 2.0 Iggy Pop Glitter-T Product Type: Clothing Price: $27 (+ sh) Get it: @ Smashing Grandpa What can I say. This is the coolest t-shirt ever made in the history of the world. In real life, Iggy is a thick transfer, and the white and grey sections are all glitter (imbedded/flattened in the transfer, not glued on). The shirt itself comes in a dozen colors, and you can get it in t-shirt, tank, bi-colored t, sleeveless, or long-sleeve. As I've raved before, Smashing Grandpa has tons of kickass merch like this , all about our fave rockers and icons. I picked Iggy cause I think his design is best, and because I do want to be his dog . Don't you?? Oh, just go buy this now! And check out our fashion section for more glam gear and an instruction manual, cuz you need it! [yah, this review is a lot shorter , innit, that's the way these things are gonna go. the cultural shite will have long, hopefully insightful commentary, but the purely material will be straight to the point. cheers!] Here's the song that the Iggy T-shirt sings to me when I rub the plastic: Search and Destroy I'm a street walking cheetah with a heart full of napalm I'm a runaway son of the nuclear A-bomb I am a world's forgotten boy The one who searches and destroys Honey gotta help me please Somebody gotta save my soul Baby detonate for me Look out honey, 'cause I'm using technology Ain't got time to make no apology Soul radiation in the dead of night Love in the middle of a fire fight Honey gotta strike me blind Somebody gotta save my soul Baby penerate my mind And I'm the world's forgotten boy The one who's searchin', searchin' to destroy And honey I'm the world's forgotten boy The one who's searchin', searchin' to destroy Forgotten boy, forgotten boy Forgotten boy said hey forgotten boy 4.13.01__R.A. 1.0 Recommended Allowance 1.0
PERFORMANCE by Nicholas Roeg Product Type: Film/Video Price: $3-$15 Get it: @ your local video store (rent) @ TLA (buy) Nicholas Roeg created three legendary films in his career - The Man Who Fell to Earth (I think you know that one), Don't Look Now (a brilliant, shocking thriller with Julie Christie and Donald Sutherland), and Performance, his directing debut after a reknown career as cinematographer. Performance is a cult phenomenon, with a very very small, fanatical following. It's one of those Movies of Importance your filmschool friends feel superior for recognizing. It's also one of the strangest, most exhilirating, most titillating, and most confounding films ever made.
Performance was created at the literal end of the 60s, 1970, and represents the death and deconstruction of the Swinging 60s in London. The film focuses on two seemingly opposing underground scenes : the vicious criminal underworld, and the deviant bohemian counterculture. Our protagonist, Chas (played brilliantly by James Fox) is a thug hitman for a powerful crime syndicate. We follow him as he performs his job with quite ingenious artistry, and perhaps too much personal enjoyment. He ends up killing someone he shouldn't have, and goes on the lamb. Chas winds up taking a room in the house of young retired rock god Turner- played with absolutely indescribable sexual magnetism by Mick Jagger , looking more beautiful than is humanly possible. Turner, who feels he has lost the violent energy that founded his music, is transfixed with Chas's exuding evil, and he and his lovers (the androgynous Lucy, and the scene-stealing Pherber, played brilliantly by Anita Pallenberg) pull Chas deeper and deeper into identity crisis, decadance and debauchery. The ending of the film is shocking, totally inexplicable, and absolutely perfect. Now, unlike most movies that attempted to be "psychadelic", Performance is NOT CAMPY! The atmosphere here is dark and intense, psychological and psychotropic, with delicious sexual experimentation and genderplay that must have truly shocked the audience at its original release. Performance is widely regarded as the film that most literally appropriates the experience of being on drugs. Roeg's signature cinematography has been liberally pinched by every "hip" director in the world, yet his work still manages to be disorienting and provocative. And to top it all off, the film features what is likely the first "music video" ever made, you will know it when you see it. The song in question is called Memo From Turner, and the lyrics are reprinted here, with a link to an MP3, for your extreme pleasure. If this doesn't entice you, I don?t know what will: MEMO FROM TURNER (Jagger/Richards) Didn't I see you down in San Antone on a hot and dusty night? We were eating eggs in Sammy's when the black man there drew his knife. Aw, you drowned that Jew in Rampton as he washed his sleeveless shirt, You know, that Spanish-speaking gentlemen, the one we all called "Kurt." Come now, gentleman, I know there's some mistake. How forgetful I'm becoming, now you fixed your bus'ness straight. I remember you in Hemlock Road in nineteen fifty-six. You're a faggy little leather boy with a smaller piece of stick. You're a lashing, smashing hunk of man; Your sweat shines sweet and strong. Your organs working perfectly, but there's a part that's not screwed on. Weren't you at the Coke convention back in nineteen sixty-five You're the misbred, grey executive I've seen heavily advertised. You're the great, gray man whose daughter licks policemen's buttons clean. You're the man who squats behind the man who works the soft machine. Come now, gentleman, your love is all I crave. You'll still be in the circus when I'm laughing, laughing in my grave. When the old men do the fighting and the young men all look on. And the young girls eat their mothers meat from tubes of plasticon. Be wary of these my gentle friends of all the skins you breed. They have a tasty habit - they eat the hands that bleed. So remember who you say you are and keep your noses clean. Boys will be boys and play with toys so be strong with your beast. Oh Rosie dear, doncha think it's queer, so stop me if you please. The baby is dead, my lady said, "You gentlemen, why, you all work for me!" Yeah. How you like me now?
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