Fan Fiction - "The Incredible Shrink 'N' Witch" Part 7

CHAPTER 7 - To The Midnight Hour

"They’re all gone now," Frasier said to Zelda as his final party guest departed; the wall clock read 11:15. Daphne had gone to bed, and Martin was about ready to do likewise. "In a few minutes..."

"Just you and I," she replied. Well, not really...

"I’m thinking about going to bed myself," Frasier said. That raised alarms from Hilda.

If he goes to sleep before midnight, Zelly, you won’t reacquire your powers until he awakens. Do you really want to risk several extra hours as a mortal? You never know. In the meantime, something bad could happen to you.

You’ve got a point, sis. But I think I can keep him occupied until midnight... "Frasier, let’s talk for a little bit," she told him. "We really haven’t talked much about us today."

He nodded. "Would you like to go out on the balcony? We’ll have some privacy, and for Seattle in mid-November, it’s surprisingly balmy."

"That would be ideal."

But before they could do so, Martin emerged from his bedroom. "I just wanted to get a final cup of joe while I finish reading my book," he said. "Zelda, ever read real-life police or detective books?"

"Once in a while," she said, which actually meant rarely.

"I’m nearly at the end," he said with a smile. "I’ll let you two lovebirds know how it turns out when I see you at breakfast tomorrow morning." With that, he went into the kitchen to get his coffee.

Frasier turned to Zelda. "I’m really quite sorry if that sounded as if he were casting doubts on the purity of our relationship," he said softly. "I don’t like thinking that other people are assuming what we have is–"

He thinks other people think you’re a slut, Hilda bluntly told her sister. But judging from the 30-second screen, he doesn’t feel that way, so you’re all right.

"Purely physical? I didn’t sense that from your father at all," Zelda replied. "He’s a very sweet man, and I think he’s bright enough to know our affection exists on several different levels." Do you think Frasier wants me to go to bed with him again, she asked Hilda.

Not that I can tell, her younger sister replied. I think his feelings towards you are genuine, and he’s not out for another time in the sack.

That’s good, Zelda said, because if I slept with him again, it’d just be another chaotic 24 hours. Eventually that would catch up with both of us.

Not to mention me in here another day, further spoiling what little life I have, Hilda added.

Martin, carefully holding his cup of coffee, walked past the pair. "Hey, listen," he told Zelda. "I hope what I just said didn’t make you feel unwelcome here. Just as Frasier and Niles have the common decency I always wanted from my sons..."

"Thank you, Dad," Frasier replied.

"...so you, Zelda, appear to embody all the qualities I’d want from a daughter, just as Daphne sort of serves as the daughter I never had." He paused and looked at Frasier. "Don’t ever tell her I said that."

"You have my word."

Zelda smiled and gave Martin a peck on the cheek while grasping his cup of coffee so it wouldn’t fall. "It’s evident from Frasier that you did a great job as a father," she told him, "and for that I thank you."

Martin glanced at his watch. "Heck, it’s past 11:30," he said, shuffling to his room and closing the door behind him.

"Now’s the time," Frasier said, waving his hand towards the balcony and handing Zelda his jacket. "Here, wear this in case it gets chilly out there."

"Still the gentleman, I see." It’s 11:33, Hilda told her sister. Just hold on for 27 minutes more, and you’ll be a full-fledged witch again.

For a few minutes, they simply stared out at the darkened Seattle skyline, without talking; like the night before, there was little to see, though the sounds of the streets below softly resonated through the air. Then, at 11:38 according to Zelda’s watch, Frasier turned to her.

"I don’t think we’ve run out of things to say," he said gently. "I sense we simply haven’t found a way to say it."

She smiled in response and clasped her hands over the railing. "I believe you’re right. There are many things I’d like to tell you, and probably things you want to tell me, but where is the framework for it? What’s the proper setting? We don’t know what it is yet."

"This could be an exquisite relationship," he said. "I’m not ashamed to admit I admire beauty in a woman, but intelligence enhances a woman’s beauty and personality aids it further still."

You’re in a purple dress, and he’s reciting purple prose, Hilda said. You’re not believing all this garbage, Zelly, are you?

Let’s just say I’ll believe what I want to. Don’t spoil this for me.

Zelda looked into his eyes. "Frasier, if I took this job I could be offered and relocated out here, don’t feel I’d be pressuring you to continue this relationship if it isn’t what you want. I like your style, your taste, your intelligence, but above all I want you to be happy."

He smiled at her. "After all these hours you’ve spent with me, it should be obvious that, at times, I’m not the easiest person in the world to get along with."

"The work indeed is challenging," Zelda told him, "but the benefits are amazing." With that, she wrapped her arms around him and planted a few kisses on his face. Fifteen minutes left, Zelly, her sister reminded.

"To borrow a Gershwin title, nice work if you can get it," Frasier said as Zelda nodded. Both feeling slightly awkward, they retreated to their previous positions watching over the city, her hands folded just over the railing.

I sense he’s thinking about living life with you, Hilda told her sister. No, nothing on the screen; it’s just a hunch of mine.

It should come as no surprise to you that I’m doing likewise, sis. Zelda smiled. He and I, married, albeit a few years from now...

If it happened, would you tell him...

...that I’m a witch? Sure, in time. I mean, Ted did it, Zelda replied,referring to their brother and Sabrina’s father, who had married a mortal woman before they ultimately divorced. I don’t think he’d be intimidated by my powers, nor would he try to exploit me or reveal my secret.

And our mother looks nothing at all like Agnes Moorehead, Hilda quipped. By the way, it’s 11:51.

The silence continued for a few minutes more, while Hilda carefully watched the clock near the 30-second device. It was now 11:57, and all systems seemed go before Frasier’s temporary magic would revert back to Zelda.

Still resting her hands on the railing, Zelda turned her head to look at Frasier. "I think I’ve said this at least once since we met," she said, "but just in case I haven’t, I will say it now. I love you."

"And I love you," Frasier affectionately replied, gently kissing her on the lips. "I’m trying to recall the last time I felt so strongly about a woman. Maybe it was Lilith, maybe it was Diane – she was a girl I knew in Boston back in the eighties." He smiled wistfully. "Je t’aime, Zelda."

"Love," Zelda said. "Four little letters, and yet it may be the mightiest word in the language."

Frasier thought about it for a few seconds, and concurred. "Over the centuries, great minds – Freud, Jung among them – have tried to comprehend it, define it, distill it, ultimately without success. Love indeed has an almost magical, mystical power."

Just after the clock reached 11:59 and the day’s final seconds began ticking off, Zelda again glanced at Frasier. "Love is pretty powerful, isn’t it?"

There were about 35 seconds to go before midnight when Hilda looked at her screen, and to her surprise saw only Zelda on the balcony. Where was Frasier? Then she saw something small on the screen fall from a stunned Zelda’s grasp.

Hilda hurriedly pressed the "freeze" button -- and that small item turned out to be Frasier himself. I know where this is going, she thought.

Zelda suddenly heard a "May day, May day" shout inside her psyche. Frasier’s going to say you have him in the palm of your hand, and you’ll accidentally drop him off the balcony! Do something! You have only a few seconds!

"Zelda, if anyone should know about power, it’s you," Frasier said. "I mean, as far as I’m concerned, you have me–"

"I can’t go through with this," Zelda hurriedly told him while also drawing her upturned palms against her body, just in case Frasier magically wound up in her hand. But there he was, still big as life and safe, as she heard chimes in the distance of the still night and felt a familiar power re-enter her body. It was midnight, and she was a witch again.

Whew, that was close, Hilda told her sister while wiping her forehead in relief. But, did you mean what you just said?

Frasier, who apparently didn’t feel a thing from the magic transfer, rested his chin on his fist in thought for a few seconds, and then nodded. "As much as we obviously love each other, I sense you’re doing the right thing," he told Zelda. "This relationship developed in an incorrect way. Like a poorly cared-for houseplant, we gave it too much water at the start, and now it will never blossom to its potential."

"Interesting analogy, that," she replied.

"Also, I don’t think it’s any big secret that when we fall in love, we tend to project unreal, almost fantasy qualities on those we desire."

Tell me about it, Zelda and Hilda simultaneously thought.

"And if you don’t mind my saying so," he added, "you held me spellbound. But, ultimately, this relationship probably wasn’t going to succeed."

Zelda nodded in agreement. "In addition, you have your obligations to Frederick, the son with Lilith you told me about. I have mine, especially to my niece Sabrina as she prepares to become a young adult. And there are 3,000 miles between us, and will continue to be, since if I’m offered that job I’m going to turn it down. Could this work between us? Perhaps in the future, but not now."

"Nevertheless," Frasier replied, "I’m glad we met and shared some wonderful times. I like to think there will always be a magical part of you within me." With that, he hugged her.

"You don’t know the half of it, dearie," she whispered to him.

This is coming off like the end of a comic book, Hilda telepathically told her sister, as if you were Superman and Frasier Crane was Lois Lane. What next? Are you going to wink at the audience?

Hilda, get out, Zelda answered. And using her regained magic for the first time, she zapped her sister out of Frasier’s now-mortal brain and into the bottom of her handbag.

"Ah, another Gershwin reference. This is why I like you," Frasier told Zelda. "Remember when I told you last night I would pay for your cab ride back to the hotel? You’ll be pleased to know that I’m still a man of my word." He took her hand, and they went back into the apartment.

"I can’t believe you gave up on him," Hilda said to her sister in Zelda’s hotel room.

"If I didn’t, he’d have died!" she answered. "Had that tiny body fallen out of my hands, by the time he hit the ground, it would have been past midnight and he would have been mortal again. I had to do it."

"So you saved his life."

"With your help, Hilda." Zelda paused. "It’s interesting when you stop and think about it. In the space of a few seconds, one of the toughest decisions of my life instead became one of the easiest."

"It’s been a long day. Can I get some sleep?"

"Sure," Zelda said, zapping her double bed into twins. "But remember, it’s back in the handbag for you when I check out this morning. I am not going to be charged for two people!"

TO BE CONCLUDED - Click here for Part 8.

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Frasier created by David Angell, Peter Casey and David Lee. Based on the character "Frasier Crane" created by Glen and Les Charles and featured in the NBC / Paramount production "Cheers". Frasier is a Grub Street Production for NBC and Paramount. All Frasier characters are copyright NBC, Paramount and Grub Street Productions.

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