“ Fair enough, I understand.” “ I’m really sorry Nick.” “ Don’t worry about it,” he smiled, “ so can I accompany you back to dinner?” “ Sure,” I stated. “ You’re not going to tell anyone about this, are you?” “ Not at all.” “ Promise?” he asked. “ Promise.” “ Thanks.” “ I’m really sorry for blowing up at you the way that I did,” I said. “ Don’t worry about it,” he said, “ I’m sure I would’ve done the same exact thing if I were you.” Dating back on all the relationships I had, I can’t pen point one that started off with someone telling me that they were falling in love with me.  Just thinking about causes me to wonder whether or not I said the right thing.  It seemed as if I was the one falling head over heels for Nick earlier tonight.  Then there’s Alex who caused me to transfer all my feeling I had for Nick, to him.  Being in a relationship at this moment in time just isn’t in my path.  Sure, it would feel nice to have someone love and care for you.  As for now, I must remain focus on why I’m here.  I can’t get all swept up in love and romance mainly because it’ll only end up as a distraction.  Perhaps once I settle down and my schedule isn’t so on-going all the time, then I might find the time to experience what love really feels like.  Just hearing Nick utter the word  ‘Love’ to  me, caused me to believe that I was hearing things.  It’s quite awkward once you think about it.  Having heard what I heard from a guy that I’ve only known for two days is so unusual to me.  There’s the thoughts of, “ Oh, it’s just a crush he’ll get over it,” or, “ What if he really is falling in love with me?”  I can’t understand how a person can experience such feelings toward a person they barely know.  What ever the reason is, I assume it has to be a good one.  As we sat through dinner, not making a sound, Alex would occasionally glance over at me and smile.  Not know what to say to remove the expression I received from Nick off my face, I simply smiled back at him and kept to myself.  Even though it felt uncomfortable sitting next to the person who just recently announced his feelings toward me lead me to believe that I wasn’t the only one experiencing the same discomfort.  What boggles my mind even more is the fact that I don’t think either Nick or I will see past this.  There will always be the same thought with every encounter we have together. Later that night, with all the symptoms of showing that something was wrong, I discovered that Alex had drawn concerned about what was going on with me. “ Are you ok?” he asked, “ Ever since you returned from the restroom, at the banquet, I noticed that you seemed to be acting differently.” “ How so?” I questioned. “ Just by how you didn’t touch the rest of your dinner and how you didn’t say a single word to any of us at the table.  What’s going on?” “ There’s just some things on my mind right now, I’ll be fine,” I replied. “ I’m here for you if you need someone to talk to.” “ Thank you Alex.” “ Well, I guess I’ll leave you to yourself now,” he said, “ It was a pleasure having you as my date tonight Michelle.” “ I’m sorry if I wasn’t what you expected me to be tonight.  I don’t know what got into me.” I stated, “ But I do know this, I had a great time with you tonight Alex.” “ As did I with you.” “ So I’ll see you tomorrow?” I asked. “ You can count on it,” he laughed. “ Goodnight Alex,” I said wrapping my arms around him, “and thank you.” “ Anything for you Michelle,” he said returning the hug. Wanting nothing more but to be held in Alex’s arms sent the type of feeling only a person in love is allowed to experience.  Having his arms around me, caressing my bare back caused me to want more of his touch. “ Would you like to come in?” I whispered in his ear. “ What?” he questioned. “ I said, would you like to come in.  Just for a while.” “ I can’t Michelle.” “ Why not?” “ Because it wouldn’t be right.” “ What wouldn’t right?” I asked. “ Lets just say that I don’t trust myself with you.” he replied, “ You’re a very beautiful woman Michelle and as much as I’d like to say yes, I’m going to have to say no.  I don’t wanna ruin what we already have, I’m sorry.” “ It’s ok, I understand.” “ You don’t hate me or anything like that because I said no to you, do you?” he laughed. “ No, not at all.  You’re just being honest.” “ Well, I’ll see you later then.” “ Goodnight Alex.” “ Goodnight Michelle,” he said placing a kiss upon my cheek.               Standing with my back against the door, I couldn’t help but to wonder what was going on with my body.  One minute I find Nick to be the center of my attention, while soon after Alex turns out to be all that I care about.  Although, I know I can’t let love in right now, it seems to be getting the best of  me in every way possible.  No matter how hard I try, I can’t help but to think about it.   It appears that that’s all that I think about now and there’s no way possible for me to stop.   Having said what I said to Alex, even questioned me.  Never have I ever utter a statement such as inviting someone in my room.  I can only imagine how I would’ve felt once waking up to Alex next to me in the morning.  There’s a part of me that wants so much to act upon my feelings toward Alex and Nick, then the on the other hand there’s the voice of my conscience telling me not to do so.  I often hear various people quote the phrase, “ Just follow your heart.”  The thing is, I simply don’t understand at all how to do that nor know what exactly my heart is feeling.         Looking upon the beautiful ocean water that stretched along the surface of the earth, to a distance unknown to us. While having the cool, salty, ocean breeze yield before us, allowing the scent to bring a smile upon our faces.  Nothing at all appeared to be more perfect than the scene of God’s well done work.  Through the translucent imagine that formed a cloud on which blocked the highly brightened rays of the sun.  With the exquisite sound of the ocean waves crashing onto the shore alongside the delightful sound of nature taking it course.   Having the wonderful view of heaven peak before me, while gazing upon life itself, sought a whole new reason for me to live.  The astonishing vibe given to me presented an aspect of love before my eyes.  Aside from the wonderful view of earth, the feeling of love and comfort filled every inch of my body. “ It’s beautiful isn’t it?” he asked. “ I’ve never seen anything so divine in my life.” I replied. “ Yeah, it is breath taking.” “ I could sit here for hours just admiring nature.” “ You know what makes it look even better?” he asked.