PS: might be a bit off, i fired my beta-reader for having sex with my sister T_T;
xxx Keith’s POV xxx
Seven fourty-five am. I’m scuttling around my kitchen, a nervous fucking wreck. Brandon and my mom aren’t up yet, and I keep darting back to the bathroom to check my hair and face over and over again (I stole some of mom’s makeup, she won’t notice). I’m wearing the new outfit Lauren bought me; no one mentioned that I didn’t pay for it. I’m wearing my hoodie over it, the black one with the checkerboard hood, because it kept snowing overnight and it’s fucking freezing. I’m also gonna wear the green and grey scarf he came me last night instead of the black and white one he gave me earlier … I should start a collection of his clothes.
Ah … last night. Just the memory makes me feel giddy and nervous and sick and ecstatic, and I don’t know if I want to throw up or grin … it’s a wonderful feeling. We kissed. I fucking kissed him, and he fucking kissed me back, and he fucking likes me and I think my head’s gonna explode if I get any more happy, I swear.
I hear footsteps down the hall, and I look up from packing my bag to see Brandon a few feet away, dressed in nothing but low slung pyjama pants. I grin at him because I’m giddy and nervous and sick and ecstatic. He looks a little caught off guard, even with his hair falling over his eyes, I can tell.
“What the hell’s up with you?” he asks with a yawn, scratching at the dark blonde stubble on his jaw.
“I have a boyfriend.” I say simply, telling the truth because I’d trust him with my life. As long as he didn’t eat it. But I have nothing to worry about, because he grins a huge, rowdy grin, the one I remember since I was five.
“So the redhead finally came around?”
“Yessssssssss,” I coo happily like a little girl and twirl around him and yank his shoulder down to kiss his cheek. Jeez, I haven’t done that in a long time. He rubs the spot where I kissed with a grimace, but I can tell he’s trying to keep from smiling.
“Well, I’m glad you finally roped a good one.” he walks into the kitchen and opens random cupboards, apparently searching for something to eat. “As long as he treats you good, who am I to say anything?”
I glow with pride for my older brother, as odd as he is.
“So … you’re … okay with me being … um, gay?” I ask tentatively. His back’s to me as he stands on tip toe to reach the top of a cupboard where we keep the cereal.
He speaks without turning around. “If I said no, I’d be a bit of a hypocrite, wouldn’t I?”
My eyes widen momentarily, and I think I heard him wrong. “What did you just say?” I ask incredulously, I must have misheard him. He looks over his shoulder to meet my eyes, but he’s blushing which I've only seen him do twice in the history of time. He looks back just as quickly and snatches a box of Fruit Loops from the shelf.
“You’d better get going, you’re late.” he says hastily. Normally I’d stick around and pester him until he clarified, but he actually is right, and I am late. And I can’t be late today … I’m walking with Coy.
“Bye big brother!” I laugh happily and haul my backpack over my shoulder and tie my shoes before skipping out the front door and down the steps.
xxxxx
I’ve never wanted to shout so bad in my life, just anything to break the silence. I walked to his house, he answered the door (silently) and stepped out (silently). We’re not even halfway down the street and I want to rip out my hair, this is so awkward! I keep looking up at him … he’s wearing his heavy dark blue coat with a matching scarf. He’s got three or four black chokers on, and he’s changed his earrings, one of them has a thin chain coming off the hoop and has two blue dice at the bottom. His jeans are black, as usual, but tight. Not usual. He’s staring ahead rather impassively, and it’s bothering me.
I can’t help but notice the bags under his beautiful icy blue eyes. He looks so exhausted, poor baby. I wonder why though, I guess he didn’t sleep last night. The conceited part of my brain thinks that maybe it was because of me … I open my mouth a few times to say something before I snap it shut again because I realize that I have nothing to say.
In a few minutes we’re at the end of the forest clearing, looking out at the fields and the school looming in the distance, wide and only one floor. It looks pretty small, and it is, we’ve only got around eight hundred some students. Good enough for me.
For the first time all morning, he looks at me. We stop walking and he turns a bit like he’s thinking of facing me. His eyes search my features, and I wonder what he’s thinking about. I sigh and realize he’s being awkward and nervous about this whole thing too, and if I ever want a friend or even a boyfriend, this has gotta stop. I have to stretch to do it, but I kiss him gently on the cheek, then quickly move away.
“Do you wa-mmmmh~!” I’m cut off. He moves so fast my head spins, and I never saw it coming. He wraps his arms around me like a leech and pulls me tight against his chest, pressing his lips ruthlessly to mine. It’s not like our first kiss on the street corner, it’s not like our second one last night, it’s different. It’s better.
His palms flatten out on my back, keeping me immobile so that even if I wanted to move, I couldn’t. I move my lips over his, thinking back to any movies I’ve seen, any books I’ve read, just so I know how to do this; I’m as virgin as you can get, but god he’s an amazing kisser. One of his hands raises and starts stroking the back of my neck, and I take a sharp breath through my nose in utter shock. I melt into him, this onslaught of sensations turn me into nothing and everything at the same time. He parts his flawless lips and his tongue flits against me; warm, wet, fucking heavenly. He toys with my lip ring for a moment before pressing my lips insistently, and I slowly let him slip between them. The velvety side of his tongue slides against mine, and I actually gasp and clench my hands in his hair. I’m so easy.
Christ, he’s way to good at this, and I can’t help but wonder if I’m doing a good job. I hope so. I love this feeling, being taken, being dominated, having his body cover mine … All too soon he pulls back, but stays pressed against me, moving to hold my jaw tilted upright so I can look him in the eye. He presses his forehead against mine, and I stare at him from only inches away. There’s a deep flush covering his cheeks, and his lips glisten with moisture. It’s painfully gorgeous.
“Are you coming over after school?” he asks quietly, and it nearly sounds nervous until I notice the malicious glint in his eyes. I’m still too overwhelmed by all this, and I’m so out of it it’s like we just fucked, and all I can manage is a dumb:
“Fuck yeah.”
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
I float through the day in a haze of utter happiness and lust, and it’s only ruined momentarily when Lux stops me in the hallway after third block.
“Keith!” she says my name angrily in her nasal voice. “You have been a horrible boyfriend! I haven’t seen you in three days!” she pokes her finger into my chest. God she’s stupid … I’m wearing eyeliner, a beaded tank top and tight jeans because I’m straight. Well … then again, there are those emo boys you always see with the hot girlfriends, and they look gay, but by some miracle, they aren’t. She’s dumb if she thinks I’m one of those. “What’s with you?!”
I smile, because nothing can ruin my mood, I can still feel Coy’s body against mine, and I don’t think it’ll ever fade. I don’t feel bad about any of this now.
“I’m breaking up with you.” I say passively.
“Are fucking HIGH?!!” she screeches. “Why would you break up with me? You’ve gotta be kidding, right?!”
“Nope.”
“B-but, why?” she starts to look desperate, and her eyes get wide. “What did I do wrong? I-I was perfect! Is it because I didn’t put out …?”
I stifle a laugh; if that’s what she thinks relationships are, I’m not going to be the last guy to break up with her. Though, I’m in such a good mood and she makes me so sick, I’m gonna have some fun with this.
“Yeah, that’s why.”
She chokes and raises a hand to her mouth, as if trying to be delicate. People pass around us and give us some odd looks. I smile a bit, but try not to because this’ll be fun. She reaches her hands out to me, and I take a step backwards.
“I’ll have sex with you!” she pleads, and I actually do start laughing now. She’s such a slut! She steps forward and hugs me. She smells sickeningly like perfume, and her hair gets in my face. Her too-thin anorexic arms twine around my neck, and her boobs are in my face. “Please!”
I try to pry her off and can’t, I think of kicking her, but as girly as I am, I’m still a guy and guys don’t hurt girls.
“Um, excuse me?” A voice that sends shivers down my spine sounds from behind me, and I turn halfway around to see Coy standing behind us with his arms crossed, a smirk on the lips I kissed. “I believe that’s mine.”
My mouth drops open as Lux peers over my shoulder at him. “What are you talking about?” she sneers, and Coy just steps forwards, reaches over my head, and shoves Lux’s forehead. Her arms unlock from my neck, probably more from shock than force, and she stumbles backwards, glaring angrily at Coy. He grabs the back of my shirt and spins me around, giving me a very pointed look … suddenly I get it. I leap into his arms and bury my face into his chest. He smells like manly cologne and fabric softener, it’s heavenly. I close my eyes as he throws an arm over my shoulders.
“This is mine.” he clarifies and pets my shoulder with his blunt fingertips.
“I … I, what? Keith, what’s going on?” Lux doesn’t even address Coy, and that just makes me angrier. I spin around in his grip, letting his arm rest under my chin, and my hands come up to touch it. I grin.
“Oh right, I forgot to tell you. I’m gay.”
Lux stares, glowers at us, then turns around and sprints.
xxx Coy’s POV xxx
The rest of the day crawls by like an ice age, and it seems like an eternity until we’re walking home together. I’m a thousand emotions all at once and they keep crossing over, so I’m basically a whorl of energy, and I can’t stop fidgeting. The snow crunches under our feet as we walk through our forest path, it’s laden with rocks and has turned brown and dirty, no where near as pretty as it was this morning … it doesn’t matter, it’ll melt soon.
I hold the springy branches out of his way as we walk through. We’re both completely silent again, and it’s rubbing every nerve I have raw. He’s barely said two words after I helped him break up with Lux, which makes me think that I shouldn’t have done it in the first place; I was just happy that he was breaking up with her.
We’re at my front door, I have to rifle through my backpack to get my keys. As soon as the door opens, I groan as horrible music meets our ears; Sasha’s home.
“Saaasshaaa?!!” I yell out, throwing down my bag and coat on the floor, Keith does the same. After walking a few wary feet forwards, three girls scamper down the hallway to meet us. One is Sasha, the other two are girls I mildly recognize as her friends, but I don’t remember their names. Some icky girl music sifts in from the living room.
“Jess, Kelsey, this is my older brother Coy.” Sasha swoops her arm and gestures to me like I’m King Kong, so I guess I haven’t met her friends, they still look familiar. Keith shuffles up next to me after kicking off his shoes.
“Aaaand thaaaat …” Sasha looks down at Keith. “… is his boyfriend!”
My stomach kicks me in the liver.
“Ohmigawd, for real?” the taller of her two friends gapes at us, and I already like her less just because of her tone. I risk looking down at Keith, who just grins up at me happily as he laces his hand in mine. I blush.
“Yup!” I say cheerfully and I tug him past them into the living room where we quickly get rid of the CD that turns out to be Hilary Duff. I rifle through the CD cabinet and pick out Bleed American by Jimmy Eat World, flicking to track six.
… There’s no one in town I know, you gave us some place to go … I never said thank you for that … thought I might get one more chance …
“Ahh! Goddammit Coy, turn that shit off!” Sasha runs into the room with her hands clapped over her ears.
… What would you think of me now? So lucky, so strong, so proud … I never said thank you for that … now I’ll never have a chance.
“Go upstairs and I wiiiiill …” I tease and Keith starts to sing along; I know he loves this song.
… May angels lead you in … hear you me, my friend … on sleepless roads the sleepless go, may angels lead you in …
I think he has a gorgeous voice, he just doesn’t know it. Sasha gives up and stomps out of the room, attempting to tug her friends with her. They, however, are watching as I step closer to Keith, putting my hands on his hips and swaying to the gentle music. His singing softens.
… So what would you think of me now? So lucky, so strong, so proud … I never said thank you for that … now I’ll never have a chance …
His hands cover mine on his hips, he’s smiling and his eyes are shining happily as he stares up at me. I sing along quietly as well as the chorus repeats.
… May angels lead you in … hear you me, my friend … on sleepless roads the sleepless go, may angels lead you in …
He laughs quietly and we keep swaying until the song ends, then we turn it down.
“Oh by the way …” I hold his hand again and walk into the kitchen, leaning into the fridge. “… I got you a present.”
I pull out a cherry-bit cake.
He screams.
“Oh my fucking god you got me a fucking cake!!!!” his voice squeaks and he leans into it so close he gets icing on his nose. “JESUS FUCKING CHRIST IT’S CHERRY! OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GOT ME A FUCKING CAKE!” his voice dies down when I put the cake on the counter and move closer, taking his head in my hands and tilting his head up until his neck is arched.
His eyes are a little wide and the icing is still on his nose, so I carefully suck it off. He gives a breathless giggle and sticks his tongue out, so I suck on that too. He stands on tiptoe and forces me into a deep, gentle kiss. I brush my thumbs over his cheeks, surprised at how smooth his skin is, and his tiny hands run over my forearms as I do so. When we pull apart, he looks a little apprehensive, and the grip on my arms tightens.
“Did you mean that …?” he whispers, looking up at me from only inches away.
“The cake? Yeah its all yours.”
“N-no, the other thing … I’m your … boyfriend?”
I kiss his nose again but there’s no icing, I just do it because he has such a cute nose. A little upturned, but not nearly enough to be snooty.
“If you haven’t noticed, I don’t exactly go around doing this kind of thing with everyone …” I don’t go down that path when his look sours. “You’re my boyfriend if you want to be. You’ve been my best friend since we were little, and you mean more to me than anything else … nothing would make me happier if you were my boyfriend too.” I smile down at him, feeling very silly and ashamed. His head is still in my hands, but he stretches up to kiss my cheek. He still isn’t tall enough so his lips bump clumsily against my jaw.
“You’re such a sap.” he laughs and kisses all the way up the underside of my chin to the corner of my mouth, then to my lips. I hug him tight against me, dropping my hands to hold his back. His quiet laughing stops, I fucking love hugging him, I love his smell, his feel, his lips, his taste, everything Keith.
He nuzzles his face into my shoulder.
“So … is that cake really mine?”
“Yup.” I say, completely smitten. “Well, if it’s alright with you, I’d like some.”
He kisses my neck softly. “It’s alright with me.”
xxxxx
We’re sitting on my overstuffed couch in front of the TV watching South Park. I’m against one of the arms with my feet up and Keith’s nestled between my legs, his back is warm and fragile against my chest. My nose if buried in his hair, it smells like some kind of citrus mango shampoo and it’s soft but spiky with gel. When he tilts his head back to say something, his breath smells like vanilla icing and I can’t help but kiss him again, I love the way he kisses, passionate but gentle, delightfully submissive. I’ve figured this out after only a day. His cake’s balancing precariously on his knee, resting on one of our tiny green plates, but he’s not eating it because my arms are wrapped around his middle, pinning his arms to his side so I can keep kissing him. He doesn’t complain, so I assume I’m not horrible at kissing. He certainly isn’t.
The sun is slowly dipping below our neighbouring houses, and only dim rays shine though the many windows in my too-well-lit living room, casting bars on the peach carpet. I like my room better; it’s darker and more personal, but for now this is perfect. Jimmy Eat World is still softly singing around us, and we randomly sing along on our favorite songs.
For the first time in at least two months, I’m completely content.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
We stayed like that until nine that night and we didn’t move from that spot the entire time. Well, once, because I bit the back of his neck and his knee jerked, which made his plate fall on the ground so he had to get it. He wanted to spend the night, but I told him no because we had school tomorrow and my mom was coming home in a few hours. He pouted in mock-anger and didn’t stop until I kissed him (By the way, I’ve been counting. We kissed fifty-two times.)
Now it’s the next morning and we’re waiting near Lauren’s street, she said she wanted to walk with us. Keith’s next to me, bouncing around happily from foot to foot as we wait. His hand’s loosely holding mine and he keeps complaining good naturedly about ‘how fucking cold it is out here’ which is true. It snowed again last night and we’re both wearing coats, scarves and mittens, and we’re both still freezing.
After what seems like forever, Lauren comes around the bend. In one glance she sees our smiles, our joined hands, and how close we’re standing, and she knows something’s happened. We didn’t get a chance to tell her yesterday, I (and probably Keith) expect her to get all squealy and girlish, but she just walks up to us and smacks up upside the head simultaneously.
“FINALLY~!!”
We both gape.
“That fucking took long enough!” she sighs, then does exactly what we expected her too, it was just belated. “Now, lets see you kiss.”
We both have the decency to blush. “No.” Keith answers instantly, and Laur scowls.
“Oh come on, I put up with your bitching and denial for months! This is the least you can do!” she whines.
“Fiiine~” I sigh like this is such a huge task. I turn towards my tiny boyfriend (I still can’t believe it!), pull his arms against my chest and kiss him. I feel him fight a smile as he presses closer to me. My eyes nearly shoot open when I feel him gently tug on my lip ring with his teeth, taking my bottom lip into his mouth and sucking on it. I pull back eventually and he’s a little flushed like he always is after we kiss, and it’s adorable … it almost makes me never want to stop.
Lauren giggles when we look at her.
“Hee … hee hee … you guys kissed!” she breaks down into a fit of giggles and can’t talk anymore, so we start walking away. She follows after us after calming her laughing and begs us to do it again.
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xxx Keith’s POV xxx
Seven fourty-five am. I’m scuttling around my kitchen, a nervous fucking wreck. Brandon and my mom aren’t up yet, and I keep darting back to the bathroom to check my hair and face over and over again (I stole some of mom’s makeup, she won’t notice). I’m wearing the new outfit Lauren bought me; no one mentioned that I didn’t pay for it. I’m wearing my hoodie over it, the black one with the checkerboard hood, because it kept snowing overnight and it’s fucking freezing. I’m also gonna wear the green and grey scarf he came me last night instead of the black and white one he gave me earlier … I should start a collection of his clothes.
Ah … last night. Just the memory makes me feel giddy and nervous and sick and ecstatic, and I don’t know if I want to throw up or grin … it’s a wonderful feeling. We kissed. I fucking kissed him, and he fucking kissed me back, and he fucking likes me and I think my head’s gonna explode if I get any more happy, I swear.
I hear footsteps down the hall, and I look up from packing my bag to see Brandon a few feet away, dressed in nothing but low slung pyjama pants. I grin at him because I’m giddy and nervous and sick and ecstatic. He looks a little caught off guard, even with his hair falling over his eyes, I can tell.
“What the hell’s up with you?” he asks with a yawn, scratching at the dark blonde stubble on his jaw.
“I have a boyfriend.” I say simply, telling the truth because I’d trust him with my life. As long as he didn’t eat it. But I have nothing to worry about, because he grins a huge, rowdy grin, the one I remember since I was five.
“So the redhead finally came around?”
“Yessssssssss,” I coo happily like a little girl and twirl around him and yank his shoulder down to kiss his cheek. Jeez, I haven’t done that in a long time. He rubs the spot where I kissed with a grimace, but I can tell he’s trying to keep from smiling.
“Well, I’m glad you finally roped a good one.” he walks into the kitchen and opens random cupboards, apparently searching for something to eat. “As long as he treats you good, who am I to say anything?”
I glow with pride for my older brother, as odd as he is.
“So … you’re … okay with me being … um, gay?” I ask tentatively. His back’s to me as he stands on tip toe to reach the top of a cupboard where we keep the cereal.
He speaks without turning around. “If I said no, I’d be a bit of a hypocrite, wouldn’t I?”
My eyes widen momentarily, and I think I heard him wrong. “What did you just say?” I ask incredulously, I must have misheard him. He looks over his shoulder to meet my eyes, but he’s blushing which I've only seen him do twice in the history of time. He looks back just as quickly and snatches a box of Fruit Loops from the shelf.
“You’d better get going, you’re late.” he says hastily. Normally I’d stick around and pester him until he clarified, but he actually is right, and I am late. And I can’t be late today … I’m walking with Coy.
“Bye big brother!” I laugh happily and haul my backpack over my shoulder and tie my shoes before skipping out the front door and down the steps.
xxxxx
I’ve never wanted to shout so bad in my life, just anything to break the silence. I walked to his house, he answered the door (silently) and stepped out (silently). We’re not even halfway down the street and I want to rip out my hair, this is so awkward! I keep looking up at him … he’s wearing his heavy dark blue coat with a matching scarf. He’s got three or four black chokers on, and he’s changed his earrings, one of them has a thin chain coming off the hoop and has two blue dice at the bottom. His jeans are black, as usual, but tight. Not usual. He’s staring ahead rather impassively, and it’s bothering me.
I can’t help but notice the bags under his beautiful icy blue eyes. He looks so exhausted, poor baby. I wonder why though, I guess he didn’t sleep last night. The conceited part of my brain thinks that maybe it was because of me … I open my mouth a few times to say something before I snap it shut again because I realize that I have nothing to say.
In a few minutes we’re at the end of the forest clearing, looking out at the fields and the school looming in the distance, wide and only one floor. It looks pretty small, and it is, we’ve only got around eight hundred some students. Good enough for me.
For the first time all morning, he looks at me. We stop walking and he turns a bit like he’s thinking of facing me. His eyes search my features, and I wonder what he’s thinking about. I sigh and realize he’s being awkward and nervous about this whole thing too, and if I ever want a friend or even a boyfriend, this has gotta stop. I have to stretch to do it, but I kiss him gently on the cheek, then quickly move away.
“Do you wa-mmmmh~!” I’m cut off. He moves so fast my head spins, and I never saw it coming. He wraps his arms around me like a leech and pulls me tight against his chest, pressing his lips ruthlessly to mine. It’s not like our first kiss on the street corner, it’s not like our second one last night, it’s different. It’s better.
His palms flatten out on my back, keeping me immobile so that even if I wanted to move, I couldn’t. I move my lips over his, thinking back to any movies I’ve seen, any books I’ve read, just so I know how to do this; I’m as virgin as you can get, but god he’s an amazing kisser. One of his hands raises and starts stroking the back of my neck, and I take a sharp breath through my nose in utter shock. I melt into him, this onslaught of sensations turn me into nothing and everything at the same time. He parts his flawless lips and his tongue flits against me; warm, wet, fucking heavenly. He toys with my lip ring for a moment before pressing my lips insistently, and I slowly let him slip between them. The velvety side of his tongue slides against mine, and I actually gasp and clench my hands in his hair. I’m so easy.
Christ, he’s way to good at this, and I can’t help but wonder if I’m doing a good job. I hope so. I love this feeling, being taken, being dominated, having his body cover mine … All too soon he pulls back, but stays pressed against me, moving to hold my jaw tilted upright so I can look him in the eye. He presses his forehead against mine, and I stare at him from only inches away. There’s a deep flush covering his cheeks, and his lips glisten with moisture. It’s painfully gorgeous.
“Are you coming over after school?” he asks quietly, and it nearly sounds nervous until I notice the malicious glint in his eyes. I’m still too overwhelmed by all this, and I’m so out of it it’s like we just fucked, and all I can manage is a dumb:
“Fuck yeah.”
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
I float through the day in a haze of utter happiness and lust, and it’s only ruined momentarily when Lux stops me in the hallway after third block.
“Keith!” she says my name angrily in her nasal voice. “You have been a horrible boyfriend! I haven’t seen you in three days!” she pokes her finger into my chest. God she’s stupid … I’m wearing eyeliner, a beaded tank top and tight jeans because I’m straight. Well … then again, there are those emo boys you always see with the hot girlfriends, and they look gay, but by some miracle, they aren’t. She’s dumb if she thinks I’m one of those. “What’s with you?!”
I smile, because nothing can ruin my mood, I can still feel Coy’s body against mine, and I don’t think it’ll ever fade. I don’t feel bad about any of this now.
“I’m breaking up with you.” I say passively.
“Are fucking HIGH?!!” she screeches. “Why would you break up with me? You’ve gotta be kidding, right?!”
“Nope.”
“B-but, why?” she starts to look desperate, and her eyes get wide. “What did I do wrong? I-I was perfect! Is it because I didn’t put out …?”
I stifle a laugh; if that’s what she thinks relationships are, I’m not going to be the last guy to break up with her. Though, I’m in such a good mood and she makes me so sick, I’m gonna have some fun with this.
“Yeah, that’s why.”
She chokes and raises a hand to her mouth, as if trying to be delicate. People pass around us and give us some odd looks. I smile a bit, but try not to because this’ll be fun. She reaches her hands out to me, and I take a step backwards.
“I’ll have sex with you!” she pleads, and I actually do start laughing now. She’s such a slut! She steps forward and hugs me. She smells sickeningly like perfume, and her hair gets in my face. Her too-thin anorexic arms twine around my neck, and her boobs are in my face. “Please!”
I try to pry her off and can’t, I think of kicking her, but as girly as I am, I’m still a guy and guys don’t hurt girls.
“Um, excuse me?” A voice that sends shivers down my spine sounds from behind me, and I turn halfway around to see Coy standing behind us with his arms crossed, a smirk on the lips I kissed. “I believe that’s mine.”
My mouth drops open as Lux peers over my shoulder at him. “What are you talking about?” she sneers, and Coy just steps forwards, reaches over my head, and shoves Lux’s forehead. Her arms unlock from my neck, probably more from shock than force, and she stumbles backwards, glaring angrily at Coy. He grabs the back of my shirt and spins me around, giving me a very pointed look … suddenly I get it. I leap into his arms and bury my face into his chest. He smells like manly cologne and fabric softener, it’s heavenly. I close my eyes as he throws an arm over my shoulders.
“This is mine.” he clarifies and pets my shoulder with his blunt fingertips.
“I … I, what? Keith, what’s going on?” Lux doesn’t even address Coy, and that just makes me angrier. I spin around in his grip, letting his arm rest under my chin, and my hands come up to touch it. I grin.
“Oh right, I forgot to tell you. I’m gay.”
Lux stares, glowers at us, then turns around and sprints.
xxx Coy’s POV xxx
The rest of the day crawls by like an ice age, and it seems like an eternity until we’re walking home together. I’m a thousand emotions all at once and they keep crossing over, so I’m basically a whorl of energy, and I can’t stop fidgeting. The snow crunches under our feet as we walk through our forest path, it’s laden with rocks and has turned brown and dirty, no where near as pretty as it was this morning … it doesn’t matter, it’ll melt soon.
I hold the springy branches out of his way as we walk through. We’re both completely silent again, and it’s rubbing every nerve I have raw. He’s barely said two words after I helped him break up with Lux, which makes me think that I shouldn’t have done it in the first place; I was just happy that he was breaking up with her.
We’re at my front door, I have to rifle through my backpack to get my keys. As soon as the door opens, I groan as horrible music meets our ears; Sasha’s home.
“Saaasshaaa?!!” I yell out, throwing down my bag and coat on the floor, Keith does the same. After walking a few wary feet forwards, three girls scamper down the hallway to meet us. One is Sasha, the other two are girls I mildly recognize as her friends, but I don’t remember their names. Some icky girl music sifts in from the living room.
“Jess, Kelsey, this is my older brother Coy.” Sasha swoops her arm and gestures to me like I’m King Kong, so I guess I haven’t met her friends, they still look familiar. Keith shuffles up next to me after kicking off his shoes.
“Aaaand thaaaat …” Sasha looks down at Keith. “… is his boyfriend!”
My stomach kicks me in the liver.
“Ohmigawd, for real?” the taller of her two friends gapes at us, and I already like her less just because of her tone. I risk looking down at Keith, who just grins up at me happily as he laces his hand in mine. I blush.
“Yup!” I say cheerfully and I tug him past them into the living room where we quickly get rid of the CD that turns out to be Hilary Duff. I rifle through the CD cabinet and pick out Bleed American by Jimmy Eat World, flicking to track six.
… There’s no one in town I know, you gave us some place to go … I never said thank you for that … thought I might get one more chance …
“Ahh! Goddammit Coy, turn that shit off!” Sasha runs into the room with her hands clapped over her ears.
… What would you think of me now? So lucky, so strong, so proud … I never said thank you for that … now I’ll never have a chance.
“Go upstairs and I wiiiiill …” I tease and Keith starts to sing along; I know he loves this song.
… May angels lead you in … hear you me, my friend … on sleepless roads the sleepless go, may angels lead you in …
I think he has a gorgeous voice, he just doesn’t know it. Sasha gives up and stomps out of the room, attempting to tug her friends with her. They, however, are watching as I step closer to Keith, putting my hands on his hips and swaying to the gentle music. His singing softens.
… So what would you think of me now? So lucky, so strong, so proud … I never said thank you for that … now I’ll never have a chance …
His hands cover mine on his hips, he’s smiling and his eyes are shining happily as he stares up at me. I sing along quietly as well as the chorus repeats.
… May angels lead you in … hear you me, my friend … on sleepless roads the sleepless go, may angels lead you in …
He laughs quietly and we keep swaying until the song ends, then we turn it down.
“Oh by the way …” I hold his hand again and walk into the kitchen, leaning into the fridge. “… I got you a present.”
I pull out a cherry-bit cake.
He screams.
“Oh my fucking god you got me a fucking cake!!!!” his voice squeaks and he leans into it so close he gets icing on his nose. “JESUS FUCKING CHRIST IT’S CHERRY! OH MY GOD I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU GOT ME A FUCKING CAKE!” his voice dies down when I put the cake on the counter and move closer, taking his head in my hands and tilting his head up until his neck is arched.
His eyes are a little wide and the icing is still on his nose, so I carefully suck it off. He gives a breathless giggle and sticks his tongue out, so I suck on that too. He stands on tiptoe and forces me into a deep, gentle kiss. I brush my thumbs over his cheeks, surprised at how smooth his skin is, and his tiny hands run over my forearms as I do so. When we pull apart, he looks a little apprehensive, and the grip on my arms tightens.
“Did you mean that …?” he whispers, looking up at me from only inches away.
“The cake? Yeah its all yours.”
“N-no, the other thing … I’m your … boyfriend?”
I kiss his nose again but there’s no icing, I just do it because he has such a cute nose. A little upturned, but not nearly enough to be snooty.
“If you haven’t noticed, I don’t exactly go around doing this kind of thing with everyone …” I don’t go down that path when his look sours. “You’re my boyfriend if you want to be. You’ve been my best friend since we were little, and you mean more to me than anything else … nothing would make me happier if you were my boyfriend too.” I smile down at him, feeling very silly and ashamed. His head is still in my hands, but he stretches up to kiss my cheek. He still isn’t tall enough so his lips bump clumsily against my jaw.
“You’re such a sap.” he laughs and kisses all the way up the underside of my chin to the corner of my mouth, then to my lips. I hug him tight against me, dropping my hands to hold his back. His quiet laughing stops, I fucking love hugging him, I love his smell, his feel, his lips, his taste, everything Keith.
He nuzzles his face into my shoulder.
“So … is that cake really mine?”
“Yup.” I say, completely smitten. “Well, if it’s alright with you, I’d like some.”
He kisses my neck softly. “It’s alright with me.”
xxxxx
We’re sitting on my overstuffed couch in front of the TV watching South Park. I’m against one of the arms with my feet up and Keith’s nestled between my legs, his back is warm and fragile against my chest. My nose if buried in his hair, it smells like some kind of citrus mango shampoo and it’s soft but spiky with gel. When he tilts his head back to say something, his breath smells like vanilla icing and I can’t help but kiss him again, I love the way he kisses, passionate but gentle, delightfully submissive. I’ve figured this out after only a day. His cake’s balancing precariously on his knee, resting on one of our tiny green plates, but he’s not eating it because my arms are wrapped around his middle, pinning his arms to his side so I can keep kissing him. He doesn’t complain, so I assume I’m not horrible at kissing. He certainly isn’t.
The sun is slowly dipping below our neighbouring houses, and only dim rays shine though the many windows in my too-well-lit living room, casting bars on the peach carpet. I like my room better; it’s darker and more personal, but for now this is perfect. Jimmy Eat World is still softly singing around us, and we randomly sing along on our favorite songs.
For the first time in at least two months, I’m completely content.
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
We stayed like that until nine that night and we didn’t move from that spot the entire time. Well, once, because I bit the back of his neck and his knee jerked, which made his plate fall on the ground so he had to get it. He wanted to spend the night, but I told him no because we had school tomorrow and my mom was coming home in a few hours. He pouted in mock-anger and didn’t stop until I kissed him (By the way, I’ve been counting. We kissed fifty-two times.)
Now it’s the next morning and we’re waiting near Lauren’s street, she said she wanted to walk with us. Keith’s next to me, bouncing around happily from foot to foot as we wait. His hand’s loosely holding mine and he keeps complaining good naturedly about ‘how fucking cold it is out here’ which is true. It snowed again last night and we’re both wearing coats, scarves and mittens, and we’re both still freezing.
After what seems like forever, Lauren comes around the bend. In one glance she sees our smiles, our joined hands, and how close we’re standing, and she knows something’s happened. We didn’t get a chance to tell her yesterday, I (and probably Keith) expect her to get all squealy and girlish, but she just walks up to us and smacks up upside the head simultaneously.
“FINALLY~!!”
We both gape.
“That fucking took long enough!” she sighs, then does exactly what we expected her too, it was just belated. “Now, lets see you kiss.”
We both have the decency to blush. “No.” Keith answers instantly, and Laur scowls.
“Oh come on, I put up with your bitching and denial for months! This is the least you can do!” she whines.
“Fiiine~” I sigh like this is such a huge task. I turn towards my tiny boyfriend (I still can’t believe it!), pull his arms against my chest and kiss him. I feel him fight a smile as he presses closer to me. My eyes nearly shoot open when I feel him gently tug on my lip ring with his teeth, taking my bottom lip into his mouth and sucking on it. I pull back eventually and he’s a little flushed like he always is after we kiss, and it’s adorable … it almost makes me never want to stop.
Lauren giggles when we look at her.
“Hee … hee hee … you guys kissed!” she breaks down into a fit of giggles and can’t talk anymore, so we start walking away. She follows after us after calming her laughing and begs us to do it again.
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