Helluva Hangover

“Fifteenth squad,” John said, answering the phone in the same cheerful voice he used every day, as if he were oblivious to the gray leaky skies outside the precinct house. “Yes, ma’am. Isn’t that a coincidence? It’s the fifteenth of February, and it’s the Fifteenth squad.” John shot a glance at Detective Sipowicz and rolled his eyes, and was grateful when he grunted his support. John noticed that all the detectives glanced frequently at the clock and at Detective Kelly’s desk. Lieutenant Fancy walked in and greeted everyone.

“Andy,” Fancy said, “where’s your computer?”

“Maybe someone stole it,” Sipowicz replied, shooting a nasty look at the chirpy computer tech who sat next to Greg, coaching him in its use.

“Oh, that looks good for the 1-5,” Fancy smirked, shaking his head.

John gazed longingly at the shiny new computer. Detective Medavoy was having a hard time learning it, and John spent so much more time in administrative duties than the detective. He began building an argument in his head for why he should get the next computer. He knew he could be of great assistance with research, looking up case files, printing documents. And he really wanted the opportunity to contribute much more to the cases and really help these wonderful detectives.

“Lieutenant,” John finally summoned the courage to plead his case to Fancy, “may I have a moment with you in your office?”

“Sure, John. But first, has Detective Kelly called in?”

“No, sir.”

“Would you try to get her on the phone? It’s urgent.” Fancy looked over at Diane, who was also shaking her head.

“Yes, sir,” John looked dejected as he picked up the phone to track down Diane’s missing partner while Fancy disappeared into his own office. He tried her home, her pager, nothing. Finally, he looked over his shoulder to make sure none of the detectives were listening, and made another call. With his hand over the mouthpiece, he asked someone if they had seen Claire yesterday or today. He cringed and tried to hold the phone under his desk, but all the detectives looked over at him as soon as the yelling started and he tried desperately to sooth the person on the phone.

From his office, Fancy could see the detectives’ heads turn in unison, and he stuck his head out of the office to find out what the heck was going on. When John hung up, he turned around and recoiled in surprise when he noticed the entire squad was watching him. Fancy’s phone rang, and he returned to his desk to answer it, keeping his eyes on the squad to make sure he got involved if anything critical happened.