Arwen Evenstarr at The One Ring.net

10. At the beginning of the movie, a receding script would outline the history of the war of the ring.
9. You never heard of Shadowfax? Fastest horse in Middle Earth! He ran from Lothlorien to Fangorn in under eight parsecs!
8. Eowyn would discover that Aragorn is her brother, and would wear a Ringwraith pleasing slave girl outfit.
7. Gandalf would appear to Frodo after he fell into the pit in Moria, but he would be smaller, and transparent, and kind of blue.
6. Weesa Gollum. Weesa your humble servant!
5. Minas Tirith would be floating in the clouds.
4. Boromir would be frozen in carbonite.
3. Frodo would find out that Saruman is his father (that whole Drogo falling out of the boat thing was a clever ruse).
2. Gimli would always speak in sarcastic beeps and whistles.
1. It would all happen a long time ago in a galaxy far, far away.