1. Did you her about the "Aggie" that drove his pickup into the lake?
His dog drowned while he was trying to get the tailgate down.

2. Did you hear about the "Aggie" who was tap dancing?
He broke his ankle when he fell into the sink.

3. Why don't "Aggies" eat barbecue beans?
They fall through the holes in the grill.

4. Why don't "Aggies" use 911 in an emergency?
Because they can't find "eleven" on the phone dial.

5. How many "Aggies" does it take to eat an armadillo?
Two. One to do the eating, and two to watch for cars.

6. Ice is no longer available in the drinks at the cafeterias at A&M.
The senior who knew the recipe graduated.

7. An "Aggies" girlfriend asked him to tell her something soft and sweet.
So he leaned over and whispered in her ear "marshmellow".

8. Why don't "Aggies" eat M&M's?
They're to hard to peel.

9. How do you know when an "Aggie" been using your computer?
Whiteout on the screen.

10. What is the "Aggies" favorite drink?
Perrier and water.


11. Did you hear about the "Aggie" at the stop sign?
Well, he's still there!!

12. How do you confuse an "Aggie"?
Lay down 3 shovels, and tell him to take a pick.

13. Hear about the "Aggie" that was 2 hours late for class?
The escalator was stuck.

14. Then there was the "Aggie" that was so dumb!
His roomate even noticed!

15. How many hours does it take an "Aggie" to screw in a light bulb?
One, but he gets three hours credit.

16. Ya know how to drive an "Aggie" crazy?
Stick him in a round room, and tell him to "tinkle" in the corner.

17. Did you hear about the "Aggie" that broke his leg raking leaves?
He fell out of the tree.

18. How come "Aggies" don't drink kool-aid?
Because they can't figure out how to get 2 quarts of water in the little package.

19. Did you hear about the "Aggie" who won the gold medel at the Olympics?
He liked it so much, he had it bronzed.

20. Did you hear about the "Aggie" who locked his keys in the car?
He couldn't get his family out.


21. Why don't "Aggies" make good pharmacists?
They can't get the pill bottles in the typewriter.

22.Did you hear what happened to the "Aggie" when he found out that 90%
of all accidents occur within 25 miles from home?
He moved.

23.Did you hear about the "Aggie" who tried to swim off an island in the
of the sea?
He swam half way to shore, and decided it was to far and swam back.

24.What is the difference between an "Aggie" and Ricecrispies?
Ricecrispies know what to do in a bowl.

25.Did you hear about the "Aggie" who put snow tires on his car?
They melted.

26.How do you keep an "Aggie" in the shower all day?
Give him shampoo that says lather, rinse, repeat.

27.Why do "Aggies" keep their diplomas on their dash boards?
So they can park in the handicap zone.

28.Did you hear about the "Aggie" who put OdorEaters is his shoes?
He disappeared!

29.Why did the "Aggie" get fired from the M&M plant as a quality control
inspector?
He kept throwing way the W&W's!

30.What do "Aggies" think Cheerios are?
Donut seeds.

31.Did you hear about the "Aggie" who tried to outrun the train?
He was hit by the 24th car.

32.Did you hear about the power outage at the A&M library?
Forty "Aggies" where stuck on the escalator for 3 hours.

33.How do you know if an "Aggie" sent you a fax?
Theres a stamp on it.

34.What do you call 144 "Aggies"?
Gross Ingnorance.

35.What did the "Aggie" graduate say to the UT graduate upon meeting?
Welcome to McDonald's, may I take your oder please?




Okay already!!! I did start it finally as promised!!! Will be adding more as time allows...stay tuned. And again...No offense intended on the "Aggies"...one of my favorites!! Longhorns...look-out, your next! **evil grin**

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