silly songs
Silly Songs
Animal Fair
I went to the animal fair.
The birds and the bees were there.
The big baboon in the light of the moon was combing his golden hair.
The monkey fell out of his bunk slid down the elephant's trunk.
The elephant sneezed and fell on his knees and that was the end of MONKEY!
Ant Song
The ants go marching one by one,
Hurrah, Hurrah.
The ants go marching one by one,
Hurrah, Hurrah.
The ants go marching one by one,
The little one stops to shoot his gun.
And they all went marching,
Along the floor,
Under the door,
Down the drain,
Into the rain,
Zoom, zoom, zoom.
Two by two- to go the loo.
Three by three- to climb a tree.
Four by four- to knock at the door
Five by five- to pick up sticks.
Six by six- to buy a twix.
Seven by seven- to look at heaven.
Eight by eight- to talk to his mate.
Nine by nine- to tell the time
Ten by ten- to buy a pen.
Five Green and Speckled Frogs
Five green and speckled frogs
Sat on a speckled log
Eating the most delicious bugs
Yum-yum!
One jumped into the pool
Where it was nice and cool
Now there are four green speckled frogs.
Four green and speckled frogs...
Pebbles
When Pebbles was a baby, a baby, a baby,
When Pebbles was a baby,
She went like this
squark squark (rub eyes)
Young girl - give me dummy
Teenager - oh ah lost my bra
Got married - dum dum de dum
Was a mother - Tidy up that dirty room
An old woman - oh my aching back
Dead - dig dig
An angel - flap flap
One Bottle of Pop
One bottle of pop, two bottles of pop,
Three bottles of pop, four bottles of pop,
Five bottles of pop, six bottles of pop,
Seven, seven, bottles of pop, pop!
Fish and chips and vinegar,
vinegar, vinegar
Fish and chips and vinegar,
Pepper, pepper, pepper, salt!
Don't throw your trash in my backyard,
My backyard, my backyard.
Don't throw your trash in my backyard,
My backyard's full!
Forty Years on an Iceberg
Forty years on an iceberg
Over the ocean wide
Nothing to wear but pyjamas,
Nothing to do but slide
The wind was cold and icy,
Jack Frost began to bite
I had to hug my polar bear
To keep me warm at night, night, night, night...
Little green frog
"Croak, croak!" went the little green frog one day, (or mmm mme Blink, stick tongue out)
"Croak, croak!" went the little green frog.
"Croak, croak!" went the little green frog one day,
And they all went croak, croak, croak!
But we all know frogs go,
(clap) Tra la la la la la,
(clap) Tra la la la la la,
(clap) Tra la la la la la,
We all know frogs go,
(clap) Tra la la la la la,
They don't go croak, croak, croak.
"Ring, ring!" went the little red phone one day,
"Ring, ring!" went the little red phone.
"Ring, ring!" went the little red phone one day,
And they all went ring, ring, ring!
But we all know phones go,
(clap) Ting a ling a ling,
(clap) Ting a ling a ling,
(clap) Ting a ling a ling,
We all know phones go,
(clap) Ting a ling a ling,
They don't go ring, ring, ring.
"Chuff, chuff!" went the little blue train one day,
"Chuff, chuff!" went the little blue train.
"Chuff, chuff!" went the little blue train one day,
And they all went chuff, chuff, chuff!
But we all know trains go,
(clap) Puff puff puff
(clap) Puff puff puff
(clap) Puff puff puff
We all know trains go,
(clap) Puff puff puff
They don't go chuff, chuff, chuff.
or
And we all know frogs go SQUELCH when you step on them
SQUELCH when you step on them SQUELCH when you step on them
And we all know frogs go POP in the microwave
POP in the microwave POP in the microwave
And well know frogs go WHZZZ in the blender
WHZZZ in the blender WHZZZ in the blender
And we all know frogs go SPLAT in the ceiling fan
SPLAT in the ceiling fan SPLAT in the ceiling fan
Old MacDonald's Farm
...version one:
Old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
And on that farm he had a cow, e-i-e-i-ooh!
With a moo, moo here and a moo, moo there,
Here a moo, there a moo, everywhere a moo, moo,
Old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
...version two:
Old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
And on that farm he had a cow, e-i-e-i-ooh!
With a big cow, little cow, little cow, big cow, Fat cow, thin cow, thin cow, fat cow,
Old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
...version three:
Old MacDonald had a sea farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
And on that sea farm he had an octopus, e-i-e-i-ooh!
With and arm, arm here and an arm, arm there,
Here an arm, there an arm, everywhere an arm, arm,
Old MacDonald had a sea farm, e-i-e-i-ooh!
other verses: crab: pinch, pinch here.... shark: jaws, jaws here.... swordfish: swish, swish
here.... jellyfish: jiggle, jiggle here....
...version four:
Old MacDonald had a farm , e-i-e-i-ooh!
Down by the sea,
Where the water melons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
ÔCause if I do
My mother will say (what will she say?) HEY
Johnny get your gun there's a bear in the garden
Lying on his back with his tummy to the sun
Singing Old MacDonald had a farm, e-i-e-i-oh!
McTavish is Dead
Oh, McTavish is dead and his brother don't know it
His brother is dead and McTavish don't know it
They're both of them dead and they're in the same bed_____
And neither one knows that the other is dead
Bingo
There was a man who had a dog,
And Bingo was his name-o!
B-I-N-G-O,
B-I-N-G-O,
B-I-N-G-O,
And Bingo was his name-o!
alternate Chorus: B with an I, I with a N, N with a G, G with an O, B-I-N-G-O, And Bingo was
his name-o!
Boogie Woogie Washer Woman
Down by the river where nobody goes,
There's a boogie-woogie washer woman washing her clothes,
Scrub, scrub, here, scrub, scrub, there,
Scrub those stains right out of there!
(or she washes them here and she washes them there, that's how the washerwoman washes her clothes)
She goes: scrub, scrub, a-boogie, a-woogie,
Scrub, scrub and a-boogie some more...
She goes: scrub, scrub, a-boogie, a-woogie,
Just a boogie-woogie washer woman washing her clothes! Yeah!
That's where the crocodile swishes his nose
Oohm Plucky Plucky
Chorus: Oohm plucky plucky Oohm plucky plucky Oohm pluck pluck pluck (repeat)
She sat by the river and strummed her guitar
Strummed her guitar, strummed her guitar (repeat)
He sat down beside her and smoked his cigar
Smoked his cigar, smoked his cigar (repeat)
He said that he loved her but oh, how he lied,
Oh, how he lied, oh, how he lied (repeat)
They were to be married but somehow she died
Somehow she died, somehow she died (repeat)
He went to her funeral but just for the ride
Just for the ride, just for the ride (repeat)
He sat on her tombstone and laughed till he cried
Laughed till he cried, laughed till he cried (repeat)
The tombstone fell over and squish squash, he died
Squish squash, he died, squish squash, he died (repeat)
She flew up to heaven and flittered and flied,
Flittered and flied, flittered and flied (repeat)
He went down below her and sizzled and fried,
Sizzled and fried, sizzled and fried (repeat)
The moral of the story is never to lie,
Never to lie, never to lie (repeat)
Three Little Angels
Three little angels all dressed in white
Tried to get to heaven on the end of a kite
But the kite tail was broken
And down they all fell
They couldn't get to heaven so they all wen to...
(repeat with) Two little angels...
(repeat with) One little angel...
Three little devils all dressed in red
Tried to get to heaven on the end of a bed
But the bed post was broken
And down they all fell
They couldn't get to heaven so they all went to...
(repeat with) Two little devils...
(repeat with) One little devil...
Three little leprechauns all dressed in green
Tried to get to heaven on a sewing machine
But the needle was broken
And down they all fell
They couldn't get to heaven so they all went to...
(repeat with) Two little leprechauns...
(repeat with) One little leprechaun...
Don't get excited, don't lose your head,
They couldn't get to heaven so they all went to BED!
Oh You'll never get to Heaven
Leader: Oh the Deacon went down
Response: Oh the Deacon went down
Leader: To the cellar to pray
Response: To the cellar to pray
Leader: The lights went out
Response: The lights went out
Leader: And he stayed all day
Response: And he stayed all day
Oh You'll never get to heaven (echo)
In a bottle of gin (echo)
Cause the lord don't let (echo)
No spirits in (echo)
(repeat without echos)
I ain't gonna grieve my lord,
I ain't gonna grieve my lord,
I ain't gonna grieve my lord no more.
On roller skates, cause you'll roll right past them pearly gates,
In a jumbo jet, cause the lord ain't built no run ways yet,
In a playtex bra, cause a playtex bra won't stretch that far,
In a baked bin tin, cause a baked bin tin's got bake beans in,
In a biscuit tin, cause the lord don't let no crummy ones in,
In so and so's car, cause so and so's car won't get that far,
In a portaloo, cause a portaloo is full of water,
On a Boy Scouts knee, cause a Boy Scout's knee's too knobbly (You never know where his hands might be),
Sheet of glass, cause a sheet of glass will cut your bottom,
On a ping pong ball, cause a ping pong ball is far too small,
On a motor bike, cause half way there you'll have to hike,
In a limousine, cause the lord ain't got no gasoline,
In a rocking chair, cause the lord don't want no rockers there,
In a wicker chair, cause the lord don't want no baskets there,
In an apple tree, cause and apple tree's got roots you see,
In a girl guides arms, cause the lord don't want no feminine charms,
If you get there, before I do,
Then dig a hole and pull me through,
If I get there, before you do,
I'll dig a hole and spit on you.
Well if I get to heaven, before you do
I'll plug that hole, with shavings and glue
That's all there is, there is no more
St Peter said, as he shut the door
Oh there's one more thing I forgot to tell
If you don't go to heaven, you'll go to...bed
Ging Gang Goolie on a Pushbike
Ging gang goolie goolie goolie on a pushbike,
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo,
Ging gang goolie goolie goolie on a pushbike,
Ging gang goo, ging gang goo,
Peddle you've got to peddle you've got to peddle up that hill,
Peddle you've got to peddle you've got to peddle up that hill,
Faster and faster and faster and faster and puncture, puncture puncture...
The Wandering Fly
There was a fly who wanted to roam
So he packed his bags and left his home
Across the road to the grocery store
Where he landed on the ceiling and landed on the floor
He landed on the sugar and he landed on the tea
And if I'd been there he'd have landed on me
Found a Peanut
Found a Peanut,
Found a Peanut,
Found a Peanut,
Just now,
Found a Peanut,
Found a Peanut,
Found a Peanut,
Just now,
- Where d'ya find it?
- In the dustbin
- Did you eat it?
- Yes I ate it
- Did you wash it?
- Yes I spat on it
- Got a pain
- Call the Doctor
- Appendicitis
- Cut her open
- Found a peanut
Boom Boom Ain't it Great to be Crazy
Chorus: Boom Boom, ain't it great to be Crazy?
Boom Boom ain't it great to be Crazy?
Giddy and Foolish all day long
Boom Boom ain't it great to be Crazy!
Way down south where bananas grow
A flea stepped on a elephant's toe
The elephant cried with tears in his eyes
"Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"
Way up north were there's ice and snow
There was a penguin and his name was Joe
He got tired of black and white
So he wore pink slacks to the dance last night!
A horse and a flea and three blind mice
Sat on the kerbstone shooting dice
The horse, he slipped and fell on the flea
Woops! said the flea, there's a horse on me!
I bought a suit of combination underwear
Guaranteed not to rip or tear
I wore them six months and to my consternation
I couldn't get the darned thing off, I'd lost the combination!
Boy and a Girl in a Little Canoe
Just a boy and a girl in a little canoe
And the moon is shining all around
As they dipped their paddles they didn't even make a sound
Well they talked and they talked till the moon went in
And he said you better kiss me or get out and swim
So you know what to do in a little canoe
When the moon is shining all a
boy paddling all a
girl swimming all around
Pink Pyjamas
Tune: John Browns Body
I wear my pink pyjamas in the summer when it's hot
I wear my flannel nightie in the winter when it's not
And sometimes in the springtime and sometimes in the fall
I jump into my little bed with nothing on at all
That's the time when you should see me
That's the time when you should see me
That's the time when you should see me
When I jump into my little bed with nothing on at all
Nosy, nosy what's it to ya?
Nosy, nosy what's it to ya?
Nosy, nosy what's it to ya?
When I jump into my little bed with nothing on at all.
Quartermaster's Stores
There are rats, rats,
Big as blooming cats,
In the store (in the where), in the store (oh yeah)
There are rats, rats,
Big as blooming cats,
In the Quartermaster's Store (behind the door!)
CHORUS:
My eyes are dim, I can not see, I
have not brought my specks with me.
I have not brought my specks with me.
There are mice, mice, mice,
Running through the rice...
There are snakes, snakes
Big as garden rakes,
There are spiders, spiders, spiders,
Swimming in the cider...
There are fleas, fleas, fleas,
Landing on the cheese...
There are bats, bats,
Bigger than the rats...
There are beavers, beavers,
Running from the cleavers...
There are eagles, eagles,
Chasing all the beagles...
There are foxes, foxes, foxes,
Sitting on the boxes...
There are owls, owls, owls,
Eating paper towels...
There are bears, bears, bears,
With curlers in their hair...
There was butter, butter,
Scraped up from the gutter,
There was gravy, gravy,
Enough to sink the navy ...
There were tables, tables,
With legs like Betty gables ...
There were chairs, chairs,
Floating down the stairs ...
There were lice, lice, lice,
packaged up like rice ...
There were ants, ants, ants,
Wearing rubber pants ...
There were kippers, kippers,
That go about in slippers ...
There was cake, cake,
That gave us tummy ache ...
There were beans, beans,
As big as submarines ...
There were eggs, eggs,
That walk about on legs ...
There were turtles, turtles,
Wearing rubber girdles ...
Whooping Cough
I said a way down south
Not so very far off
A jay bird died
Of the whooping cough
Well he whooped so hard
Of the whooping cough
That he whooped his head
And his tail right off!
Cecil
Cecil is a caterpillar, Cecil is my friend.
The last time I saw Cecil he was this big.
I said Oh! Cecil, what have you done.
He said "I've eaten a all the cabbages in the garden, but I've left you one"
Street of cabbages
Town
County
Country
Continent
World
Universe
I've been sick.
The Hippopotamus Song
A bold hippopotamus was standing one day
On the banks of the cool Shalimar
He gazed at the bottom as it peacefully lay
By the light of the evening star
Away on a hilltop a-combing her hair
His fair hippopotami maid
This hipp-o-pot-amus was no ig-nor-a-mus
And sang her his sweet serenade
Chorus:-
Mud, mud glorious mud,
Nothing quite like it for cooling the blood,
So follow me, follow,
Down to the hollow,
And there let us wallow in glorious mud.
The fair hippopotami he aimed to entice
From her seat on the hilltop above
As she hadn't got a ma to give her advice
Came tip-toeing down to her love
Like thunder and lightning re-echoed the sound
Of the song that they sang as they met
His in-am-or-ata adjusted her garter
And lifted her voice in duet (falsetto)
Chorus
Now more hippopotami began to convene
On the banks of the river so wide
wonder now what I am to say of the scene
That ensued by the Shalimar side
They dived in at once with an ear-splitting SPLOSH
And rose to the surface again
A regular army of hi-ppo-pot-ami
All singing this haunting refrain
Chorus
Show me the way to go Home
Show me the way to go home
I'm tired and I want to go to bed
I had a little drink about an hour ago
And it went right to my head
No matter where I roam
Over land or sea or foam
You will always hear me singing this song
Show me the way to go home
Ilkley Moor
Where 'as tha been since ah saw thee, ah saw thee ?
On Ilkla Moor baht 'at ?
Where 'as tha been since ah saw thee, (2x)
On Ilkla Moor baht 'at ? (3x)
- Tha's been a-courtin' Mary Jane
- Tha's ban to get thi death o' cold
- Then we shall have to burry thee
- Then t'worms will come an' eat thee oop
- Then t'ducks will come an'eat oop t'worms
- Then we shall go an' eat oop t'ducks
- Then we shall all have eaten thee !
Mules
(Tune: "Auld Lang Syne")
On mules we find two legs behind
And two we find before; We stand
behind before we find What the two
behind be for. When we're behind
the two behind We find what these
be for; So stand before the two
behind, And behind the two before.
Skips got a head like a ping pong ball
(tune Lone Ranger Theme - William Tell Overture)
Skips got a head like a ping pong ball
Skips got a head like a ping pong ball
Skips got a head like a ping pong ball
Like a piiiiiiiiiiing pong ball
ping pong (seven times) ball
ping pong (6 times) Ball
ping ping ping ping ping ping ping ping PONG
(Second verse is the same only say pong where you say ping
in the first verse and visa versa)
Oh I wish I were
(Tune: "If You're Happy and You Know It")
Oh, I wish I were a little bar of soap,
Oh, I wish I were a little bar of soap. I would slippy,
and I'd sloppy, Over everybody's botty,
Oh, I wish I were a little bar of soap,
Oh, I wish I were a little hunk of mud.
Oh, I wish I were a little hunk of mud. I would ooey and I'd gooey, Under everybody's shoey.
Oh, I wish I were a little hunk of mud.
Oh, I wish I were a little can of pop.
Oh, I wish I were a little can of pop. I'd
go down with a slurp, and come up with a burp.
Oh, I wish I were a little can of pop.
Oh, I wish I were a little slippery root.
Oh, I wish I were a little slippery root. I would sit upon the trail,
And knock everyone on his tail.
Oh, I wish I were a little slippery root.
Oh, I wish I were a little mosquito.
Oh, I wish I were a little mosquito. I'd buzzy and I'd bitey,
Under everybody's nighty.
Oh, I wish I were a little mosquito.
Oh, I wish I were a little bitty orange.
Oh, I wish I were a little bitty orange. I'd go squirty,
squirty, squirty, Over everybody's shirty.Oh, I wish I were a little bitty orange.
Meatballs
On top of spaghetti
All covered in cheese.
I lost my poor meat ball,
When somebody sneezed
It rolled off the table,
And onto the floor,
And then my poor meatball,
Rolled out of the door.
It rolled down the garden,
And under a bush.
And then my poor meat ball,
Was nothing but mush.
And then in the springtime,
My meatball tree grew,
And then there were meatballs.
For me and for you.
If you have spaghetti,
All covered in cheese,
Hold onto your meatball,
'Cos someone might sneeze.
He Jumped Without A Parachute
Tune Battle Hymn of the Republic - John Browns Body
He jumped without a parachute from forty thousand feet
He jumped without a parachute from forty thousand feet
He jumped without a parachute from forty thousand feet
And he ain't gorna jump no more
(Chorus)
Glory glory what a hell of a way to die
Suspended by your braces when you don't know how to fly
Glory glory what a hell of a way to die
And he ain't gonna jump no more
They scraped him off the tarmac like a lump of strawberry jam (3x)
And He ain't .............
They put him in a sardine tin and sent him home to mum (3x)
And he ain't...........
They put him on the mantle piece for everyone to see (3x)
and he ain't........
They spread him on a slice of bread when the vicar came to tea (3x)
and he ain't.....
The Vicar spread him on some toast and said what lovely jam (3x)
and he ain't
The next day in the NAFFI they had strawberry jam for tea
My Uncle
(Tune: My Bonnie Lies Over the Ocean)
(Substitute someone else's name for "uncle" if you wish)
My uncle fell into a pothole
In a glacier while climbing an Alp.
He's still there after 50 long winters,
And all you can see is his scalp.
Chorus: Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my uncle to me, to me.
Bring back, bring back,
O bring back my uncle to me, to me.
My uncle was proud of his whiskers,
To shave them would give him the blues.
They hung all the way to his ankles,
And he used them for shining his shoes.
My uncle had faith in a sailboat
He had built from an old hollow tree.
My uncle set sail for Australia,
Now my uncle lies under the sea.
My uncle made friends with hyenas,
He gave them a ride on his raft.
When a crocodile reached up and grabbed him,
The hyenas just sat there and laughed.
My uncle annoyed his dear parents
They tossed him right out of the bus.
And if we don't mend our behaviour,
Why that's what will happen to us.
Alice the Camel
Alice the camel has five humps
Alice the camel has five humps
Alice the camel has five humps
So go, Alice, go
Boom, Boom, Boom (move hips)
Repeat decreasing number of humps
Instead of zero goto last verse
Alice the camel has no humps
Alice the camel has no humps
Alice the camel has no humps
`Cause Alice is a horse!
Ravioli
Tune: Alouette
Chorus:
Ravioli, lots of ravioli
Ravioli, that's what I like best!
Leader: Do you like it in your hair?
Group: Yes I like it in my hair!
(Replace hair with: shirt, pants, shorts,
socks, nose, mouth, etc...)
Leader: In your hair!
Group: In my hair!
(add on each new verse)
Oh! Ravioli, lots of ravioli...
Tom the Toad
Tune: Oh Christmas Tree
Oh, Tom the toad, oh Tom the toad
Why are you lying in the road?
Oh, Tom the toad, oh Tom the toad
Why are you lying in the road?
You did not see that car ahead
That's why you're marked with tire tread
Oh, Tom the toad, oh Tom the toad
Why are you lying in the road?
Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?
Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?
You did not see the foot ahead
And now your just a spot of red
Oh Bill the bug, oh Bill the bug
What are you doing on the rug?
Oh Fred the fish, oh Fred the fish
Why are you lying on the dish?
Oh Fred the fish, oh Fred the fish
Why are you lying on the dish?
You did not see the hook ahead
And now your head is stuffed with bread
Oh Fred the fish, oh Fred the fish
Why are you lying on the dish?
Oh Froggie Fred, Oh Froggie Fred
Why do you lie there stone-cold dead?
Oh Froggie Fred, Oh Froggie Fred
Why do you lie there stone-cold dead?
You didn't look as you jumped out
A ten-ton truck ran up your snout!
Oh Froggie Fred, Oh Froggie Fred
Why do you lie there stone-cold dead?
Oh, Chicken Cluck you never slowed
As you went running cross the road
Oh, Chicken Cluck you never slowed
As you went running cross the road
Despite the other's evidence
Please tell us why you had no sense
Oh, Chicken Cluck you never slowed
As you went running cross the road
Oh Turtle Ted, Oh turtle Ted
Your shell's all broken - so's your head
Oh Turtle Ted, Oh turtle Ted
Your shell's all broken - so's your head
In the road you thought you'd travel
Now you're ground into the gravel
Oh Turtle Ted, Oh turtle Ted
Your shell's all broken - so's your head
Mrs Brady
Mrs. Brady, she was a lady
She had a daughter, that I adored
I used to court her, that is her daughter
Every Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday at half past four
Jaws
(Tune: Do Re Mi)
JAWS A mouth, a great big mouth
TEETH The things that kinda crunch
BITE The friendly sharks "hello"
US His favourite juicy lunch
BLOOD That turns the ocean red
CHOMP That means the sharks been fed
GULP That will bring us back to
JAWS! JAWS! JAWS! JAWS!
Soap and Towel
(Tune: Row, Row, Row Your Boat)
Soap, soap, soap and towel; towel and water please
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, wash your dirty knees
The Bear Went Over the Mountain
The bear went over the mountain
The bear went over the mountain
The bear went over the mountain
To see what he could see
To see what he could see
And all that he could see
And all that he could see
Was the other side of the mountain
The other side of the mountain
The other side of the mountain
Was all that he could see
Turnip Tops
You get off my turnip tops
And you get off my gate mate
If you don't run I'll get my gun
And then it'll be too late mate
Worms
Nobody likes me, everybody hates me,
Think I'll go and eat worms,
Long thin slimy ones, short fat stubby ones,
Goody goody goody goody worms,
Now the long thing slimy ones slip down easily,
The short fat stubby ones don't,
They stick in your teeth and the juice goes SLURP,
Goody goody goody goody worms,
Woad
What's the use of wearing braces,
Vests and pants and boots and braces,
Hats and spats you buy in places,
Down in bromptom road,
What's the use of shirts of cotton,
Studs that always get forgotten,
These affairs are simply rotten,
Better still is woad,
Woad's the stuff to show men
Woad to scare you foe men,
Boil it to a brilliant blue and smear it on your back and abdomen
Ancient Britons never hit on anything as good as woad to fit on,
necks and knees and where you sit on tailors you be blowed
Romans come across the channel,
all dressed up in tin and flannel,
Half a pint of woad per man'll,
Dress us more than these,
Saxons you can waste your stitches,
Building beds for bugs in britches,
We have woad to clothe us which is,
not a nest for flees,
Romans' keep your armours,
Saxons your pyjamas,
Hairy coats were meant for goats,
Gorillas, yaks, retriever dogs and llamas,
Tramp up Snowdon with your woad on,
Never mind if you get rained or snowed on,
Never want a button sewed on,
Go it ancient B's.
You Can't Keep A Cow In A Council Flat
Chorus:
You can't keep a cow in a council flat,
It's a thing that they just don't allow,
I've been right to the top and the Lord mayor said stop,
So you'll have to get rid of that cow,
A budgies OK in a bungalow,
We don't take objection to that,
But think of the wear and the tear on the stair,
If you keep a cow in a flat,
(repeat chorus)
Why not start a collection of tropical fish,
We'll make an exception for that,
But I've told you before what it does to the floor,
If you keep a cow in a flat
(repeat Chorus)
Three Blind Jellyfish
Three blind jellyfish,
Three blind jellyfish,
Sitting on a rock,
Sitting on a rock,
Three blind jellyfish,
Sitting on a rock,
But one blind jellyfish fell off (ahhh)
etc.,
But one blind jellyfish climbed back on again (hurrah!
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