My boss didn't call. It makes me curious. I wonder if she realized that I didn't do anything.

This morning was good. Went out to lunch w/ Dad after mass. Which isn't really a big change. But for some reason, the ambience was more...I don't know...cherishing? Don't know, silence can have that effect.

This song reminds me of my exgf. Herb asked why. I told him I got kinda...jealous? Haha, which I don't very often. I do, but not like that. So guys...her interest? I shook my head. I'd let her go, you know? But it was hard. I got confused, I started blaming myself. Maybe I should've spent more one on one time with her, given more effort...I could only do so much. We were both busy. I could only do so much. I didn't like them...him. Nero, they called him Nero. His real name was...Paul? Mai didn't either. I saw him once, in front of the school. I saw the cuts on his wrists, I saw that reckless look printed on his face. I saw her admiring eyes as she looked up at him. I remember turning my head away and trying to smile...act crazy Jade, like you always do. She'll never know. Don't let her worry. She probably wouldn't anyways. I felt so selfish. I shouldn't hold on to her like that. She's such a fool, how can she be so blind. How can she adore him for this? She's young, you're young too. It shouldn't be like this...You always get so attached. But I knew...he'd be bad for her. It was bad enough already. I couldn't do anything, I didn't have a say, enough justification. You know how much that hurts? I loved her. Jesus, I loved her.

It was hard for me to tear myself from her. I didn't remember loving any of my exbf's more than her.

Herb told me "don't blame yourself, only learn from yourself." I know, I know. I try.

It ended up her and Nero weren't compatible. I smiled. I knew I could dismiss her memories in peace.

But this song makes me remember.

Let's Play Some Tetris, Cheesecake

Saturday, August 9, 10:01 am
Groove Salad

Went to Cannon Beach with Mom yesterday. We went to a lot of art galleries and shopped. Didn't go to the actual beach though. Mom said "what? we're at the beach and we're not even going to see the ocean?" I told her I'd only go if I could fly a kite, but we didn't have one and I didn't buy one either. But the guy at the shop was pretty cute. Anyhow, we were tired after going down the strip, so we left.

Then I got my naval pierced. It's spiffy. Remember how I always wanted it pierced? Well, I don't think I blogged about that, but some of you know. There's a lot of care instructions, which is expected. It didn't hurt, not like the momentary shock of getting your ears pierced (I used to have mine double pierced, but they closed.) There was just a lot of pressure. The thing that was probably painful was the clamp. But shyeah, it's all good.

Got home from work early today. Apparently, I was supposed to work yesterday, which is really fucked. My boss was telling us how whoever works Saturday doesn't have to on Friday, and how we're going to alternate weekends. This girl, Lauren, and I are the pair that alternate with our hours. Anyhow, I worked last Friday, so I didn't have to yesterday, right? But I come in this morning and Tanya, another one of my coworkers, says not to work until our boss talks with me. I ask why. I guess I was supposed to work yesterday, and neither Lauren or I am supposed to work today. No way, I couldn't believe her. She shrugged, she agreed with me. I don't think our boss told me, cuz I definitely would've remembered. Tanya says my reason is quite valid, but our boss is pretty strongwilled. Anyhow, she's supposed to call, so I'm waiting ever so earnestly.

I think I'll dl more Garbage and Sneaker Pimps.

Mom and I are on quite good terms now, which is good. Still, Abby didn't get to come over tonight. Damn, we're never going to finish Fatal Frame. Anyhow, Mom called me up today and suggested we go to Cannon Beach tommorow. It'll be spiff, I'm sure. I wonder if I can persuade her to let me go to Helen's party thing.

Watched Bourne Identity, which is really good. I'm sorry, but Jason Bourne kicks more ass than James Bond. James Bond has his gadjets while Jason Bourne has...well...nothing?

Quite a busy day. Woke up at 7:30, took a shower, went for coffee with Kimiko, Flo, and Patty. Then we went with Patty while he got tickets for the Aquabats. Then I went to work.

So shyeah, Went to the Aquabats concert this evening. It was intense. I went with Kimiko, Patty, and Lin-sama. We were at the stage for the first few hours, but it ended up with Patty and Lindsay at the back, Kimiko still at the front, and me somewhat in the middle on the somewhat-edge of the mosh pit. The guitarist, Methodist Man, for one of the opening bands, Bad Credit, was really really really hott. I liked his hair (it's black, and gelled up and shiz.) Purr. I also talked to the drummer, Ryan, from another opening band called Fairview. He's crazy like a fox when he's on the drums, but he seemed pretty mellow afterwards. Maybe it's his personality, or probably just tired. Oh yeah, I met another guy. He lives in Mollala (far away from where I live.)

I should probably change the layout soon, seeing Kimiko has been home for a while. Like I said before, I really want to use the Ophelia pic, but our old ass scanner passed away a few weeks back.

I haven't talked to Travis or seen him online for a long time. I hope he's alright.

Made two more fanlistings. Their layouts are done, I just have to do the coding.

Subject's from Lin-sama's shirt.

I'm so fucking out of it.

A few days ago, I kicked it with Kimiko and Patty. I bought my beautiful Gameboy Advanced SP, which I have named Andrew. We played DDR, which Patty kicks nose at. We also watched Johnny English, which I thought was very amusing. I laughed a lot. There were little kids behind us that were like "*gasp* she said a bad word...ass..." Shyeah...They played "A Man For All Seasons" and I started freaking out. I glomped Patty's arm and kept saying "I love this song! I love this song!"

Apparently, we're making a band called FTP. We don't know what type yet. Kimiko wants it to be ska, Patty wants jazz, and me...well, I don't really know/care. It'll be interesting.

Saw FLEETWOOD MAC in concert tonight. I went with Abby (it's her birthday,) her mom, and a pair of her family's friends. Her dad was going to go, but he couldn't make it. So, Abby invited me. The ambience was amazing and contained so much energy. Most of the crowd was my parent's age, but I think that's expected. Stevie Nicks is still Stevie Nicks, Mac has a sweet hat, Mr. Fleetwood is stylin', and Lindsey is just crazy like a fox. There was a chick in her mid-20's at the floor of the stage. You could tell she was a hardcore Fleetwood Mac fan. Her hair was just like Stevie Nicks' and she was just singing and dancing and all that good stuff. Lindsey let her play with his guitar and you could tell she was really syked. There was another chick who jumped onstage and gave roses to Lindsey, but she was pulled off by security. The concert was spifftacular.

I'm pretty awake. I think it's because I had that yummy cappucino a few hours ago. Mmmm, but it was good. This song is good too. I haven't heard a song like it in a long time. It makes me happy. Thank you to Momo.

I'm going to change the layout soon. During summer theatre, I drew a picture of Ophelia from Hamlet on my script. So I'm just going to scan that and make it a layout. It'll be great.

My Blood: The Last Vampire Fanlisting got hosted by Qara. Booyaka! Hosting is spifftacular. That reminds me...I really should buy that bandwidth.

Today was the last day of Driver's Ed...thank God. I feel quite regretful though. There's this one guy named Clayton, and I hadn't ever really thought of him until today. He's very nice, charming and mature. He talks and makes nice conversation. He'd often walk with me on my way about halfway to my bus stop (if I had to use it) to his waiting area. Today (er yesterday actually,) he wished me a good life and I wished him one back. Clayton showed me the salmon handshake. He told me to do it when I saw a salmon, or when I didn't see one. When I got to the bus stop, I pondered if I should've talked to him more or at least give him my email or something. I felt the need to run back and hand him a slip of paper with my contact info. But I didn't. Now that I think about it, I should've. With the way he is...I wonder if he could've been another Peter or Travis.

Speaking of Peter and Travis...Travis called me a couple of nights ago. We didn't talk for very long, he just called cuz he was in San Francisco and waiting for a friend. He was checking up on me and saying how I IMed him and he never got to IM back. He and I think that all that I typed was "hi." Nevertheless, it was sweet of him to see how I was doing.

I'm a bit tentative on talking to Peter again, seeing Mom might track me somehow and be pissed. She's already a tad angry right now. Ever since she heard Peter was at the party, she was in a pretty bad mood. No, she really does not like Peter. I wish she wouldn't assume so much. But there's nothing I can do to swerve her conjectures.

Subject is from Mario and Momo. They called Fatal Frame "Resident Snap!" a few days ago. I was very amused and laughed, while annoyingly hitting them with my jacket because I love Fatal Frame. But it's true...it's kinda like Pokemon Snap!, except with ghosts...Shyeah. But there's no apples or pesterballs- only your body...*cough*

Okay, the gothic thing didn't really work with my aunt. I came downstairs and she says "Jade!!! Are you going to a party? You're all dressed up and have a lot of make up on." Shyeah, that totally caught me off guard. When she went upstairs to my room, she ignored all the weird factors, like how I frame pictures of stuffed animals and stick figures, have an omega symbol drawn on my mirror with lipstick. Instead, she turns around and points to my cloud, star, and moon lights and ask if they light up.

Ironically, we did end up going to a party. I changed my clothes for that. Met a lot of people. They all thought I was in my mid-twenties until I told them my age. They were surprised, which makes me laugh. But it was fun and the people were very nice. We talked a lot. Peter (the older one, not Abby's Peter) was there. You might remember him from my past blog entrees about a year ago. We haven't talked ever since last summer. But I miss talking to him.

Met Mario (not Driver's Ed Mario). Kick ass singer. He's so sweet. I'm guessing he's as old as Peter though.

I left with my Aunt, visited my cousin Ben and his wife. Went out for dinner. When we got home, I went right to bed and passed out.

I was at Fred Meyer with my Mom yesterday when this kid's all like "Hey! Did you go to Outdoor School?!" I look at the kid, and I said "shyeah." He smiled this really big grin and told me how I gave him a special bead for finding a special bead of mine. I asked him if he had fun, he said the most fun he's had. Well, shyeah, he'll be a 7th grader. I invited him and his father to the ODS picnic on the 26th. Wow, I still can't believe that kid remembered me. It was probably the hat. Hehe...magical Starfox hat.

Among the many questions I asked yesterday, I asked if he had a girlfriend. He smiled and laughed his little half-laugh and said "no" with great amusement. Later on, I asked for his phone # (dude, that took a lot of guts) and he did the same smile and little half-laugh again and thought. So I gave him a piece of paper. Andrew gave me his email and AIM sn. He said "I don't talk much" and I said "I know." (so why the point of the phone number) Whee~~! He's soadorable!!!

Auntie Lisa's coming from New York. Bleh. I love her and she's my aunt and all, but she annoys the hell out of me. For the first 2 days, it's alright. But after that...no. It's just too much. When I went to New York, she was telling me I should dye my hair back and stuff about fashion and clothes and blah. I don't know. It was like throwing a bunch of cotton at my face. Anyhow, so I'm dressing Gothic Lolita again. Hehe.

I was reading the manga, Blood: The Last Vampire when I thought of how my Mom would kill me if she found it and flipped through. Shyeah...that yuri hentai would get to her. (nevertheless, it's a really good manga.) I was talking to Abby about it and she did this long rant. "Dude yeah! If your Mom found it, you'd be sooo dead. And if you were dead, I'd be dead too...like, on the floor. DUDE!!! and the WHOLE WORLD would be dead!!! well...maybe not dead...just unconcious...FOR THREE DAYS!!! (Me: Unconcious for three days...?) Yes! Unconcious for three days!" I was laughing all the way through.

Subject comes from an article from the New York Times (May 6, 2003) that Stevie gave me cuz I love quarks so much. I was looking around on my desk when I saw a glimpse of it. I scanned it, but haven't perused it yet.

Kimiko's gone again. She's with Lin-sama in the Comic Con. Have fun!

Shyeah, I'm grounded (again) from the computer for a week cuz I was running late on Monday for Driver's Ed. Stupid reason, but hey, it's my mom who issued the order.

Andrew's doing good. I asked him a bunch of questions today and yesterday. I know odd little details about his life now, like what he ate for dinner, his birthday, his blood type (actually he doesn't know,) his pets, his computer, and other stuff. Shyeah, as my Uncle Eric said, I pick up guys in a weird way.

Shun hasn't emailed for a while. I wonder how he's doing.

I feel like shit. I don't know why. I think I'm going to take a nap.

Strengthen the lyre and sing...

Haven't heard this song in a long time every since I heard it on Abby's computer 2 nights ago. So I downloaded it last night. Wow, it's been a while.

Went to Abby's (again) last night. We made streudal muffins. They were really good. I put a marshmallow on top of mine, tee hee. We also played Fatal Frame. When we started playing after a long time, we were so freaked. In the game, Miku stood in the doorway for 15 mins while Abby and I looked back and forth from the screen to the controller to ourselves. Hehe. But after a while, it was like "haha, a ghost. I think it's hitting on you." Fun times fun times fun times.

I actually talked to Andrew today. Shyeah, that was interesting. He sits by me, so I sucked all my nervousness in and spoke.

Me: Hey Andrew
AndreW: Hey
Me: How are you doing?
Andrew: Fine
Me: That's good. Hey, what's your favorite color?
AndreW: My favorite color? Probably yellow...or blue
Me: Ah, I see. I like green.
Andrew: Green's nice.
Me: Shyeah, it is.

He smiled again. Whee~! So CUTE!!! Then class started. Hey, it was progress.

Went to the Debutante Ball meeting today. Only two families showed up, but that's expected, seeing we're Filipino and it's the first "seeing how it is" meeting. Shyeah, apparently I'm going to show them my graphic design portoflio because they want me to make the programs. I don't know how I got myself into it, but it'll be easy. They'd rather have me make the graphics instead of paying $1000 for a certain guy to do it. Norah, one of the moms, brought down the Hinabing Himig program and I went insane. I opened it immediately to Gabo's picture/profile and pointed to my mom as I laughed. Mom smiled and said to Norah "this is who she wants as her escort." Norah smiled and nodded, saying "Aaah!!! Is he the one under the umbrella you had such a hard time saying good bye to?" I blushed so much and hid behind my mom's chair. I was quite flustered.

It was decided that we do the Debute in April of 2005. 2 years to get everything read- the dress, escort, etc. I really really really really would like Gabo to be my escort, but there's only 5% chance (or less) of him being able to, which totally breaks my heart. He's tall, so if I have those 3 inch heel shoes (hehe) it won't do any harm. He's such a sweetheart, but he'd have to practically live here to dedicate his time. Ay nako...

Kimiko's coming home tonight. Shyeah, I'll be kickin' it with Abby and her family and everyone else. Fatal Frame! Booyaka!

Booyaka! Quill Driving is now hosted by Aradia. Finally, the emancipation of those cursed banners. Hehe, but I'm changing the layout soon. It's going to kick. I finally wrote again after a two month writer's block. Aradia told me I was a "budding Sylvia Plath." It flatters me because Sylvia Plath is such an awesome writer. All her poems have so much power. But it kinda makes me quirk an eyebrow in the way that Plath tried to commit suicide repeatedly and ended up sticking her head in an oven to end it all. I certainly hope that's not my fate to be. But shyeah, I guess our poems do share some similiar themes and styles.

Driver's ed was interesting today. Ugh, during class, most of the girls got into their little "group" and passed notes to every guy in the class. They were giggling and flirting and I wanted to run out of the classroom and scream. It was amusing cuz Andrew (the cute guy that doesn't really talked) was kinda "meh..." and the chick said "hey, we're just trying to make friends" with that irritating smile and voice. Right. They also showed a video that somewhat reminded me of Portal from G4. It was really weird. It was a freaking musical. They kept on singing songs about semi trucks- one "rock and roll," two country, and one rap (no zone, don't stay in the no zone...no zone, don't stay in the no zone.) It was 80% real life and 20% computerized. With that video and the girls, I think I'm traumatized.

But the driving part kicked nose. Today, I had a one hour break because I didn't have to drive today (I drive every other.) I was kicking it with three guys who liked me the minute I introduced myself, partly because I played video games. Shyeah, they thought my name was spifftacular- "Like Jade from Mortal Combat" "Yeah!" "She's the one with the big stick?" Okay, so one of them didn't know it very well. But I got invited by them to watch them drive. So I went and got stuck in the middle (as usual.) Yes, they have names. There's Mario, who's real name is Carl. I don't remember why we called him Mario, we just do. He was an observer as well, and he lives in Deviant's Palace (taken from "Dinner at Deviant's Palace") Then there's Momo aka: Andrew (different from the cute guy I was talking about.) We pondered over his name. We thought about Yoshi, but he didn't have the nose. He just wasn't Toad. I said "Peach" and he was at the wheel when he replied "Alright! Who said Peach?" And Sean (don't really have a name for him yet) said "I know what peach is in Japanese. It's Momo" but then Momo disagreed (apparently he takes Japanese) cuz it was the fruit. But we call him Momo anyhow. He sideswiped a bush. Sean bumped into 2 curbs. We talked about Anime & Manga and everything in between and out. It was very amusing.

If you haven't seen from the tag-board, Kimiko comes back Saturday night. Shyeah, Kimiko-who-hasn't-sent-me-a-postcard.

Shun leaves for Japan on the 25th. I miss him already. Ay, I get attached too easily.

To tell you the truth, I don't know why I've been listening to a lot of BoA lately. I just love this song a lot. It's my fantasy (if you remember from AMH!)- I'd be sitting under the stars, maybe with a candle or campfire lit, with someone(s) playing this song while I sung. Shyeah, so that's one of my fantasies.

Went to Lloyd today with Mom cuz her phone's jacked up. I was going to get my belly button pierced while she waited, but I ended up playing DDR. Well shyeah, you know I would. I played 1.5 games cuz I played "Dive To the Night" and FAILED!!! I don't know how...I just did. So I got really mad and played another round. I kicked ass.

Work has been going very smoothly, though it's freaking hot. But I think that's expected.

Bleehh...I still have more fanlists to join.

Dude, I'm so tired. Slept late last night, woke up early for DRIVER'S ED!!! AAAAAHHH!!!!! Two more weeks, and it's already driving me insane. Yes, there are things that make me laugh...not to mention a really cute guy. Tee hee, he has the cutest smile. BUT! He's really laconic. He'd drive me insane too. Ah well, it's all packaged together in the deal called Driver's Ed. Ed.

Kimiko comes home on the 13th. Shyeah, this Sunday. Then Lin-sama takes her away on the 17th to the Comic Con in Cali. Moo.

The guy I met at Todai, Shun...we've been emailing. It makes me happy! No really, it does. Apparently, he comes to Oregon annually to go skiing at Mt. Hood (he's a ski racer.) He's so sweet. Though, he lives 3 states away, which makes me sad. But we're communicating, which is good.

Shyeah, can't seem to stay away from this song. It's very nice.

Went to Driver's Ed today...wow, that really lacked wang. My "car" in the simulation kept on turning off ^^;; Ummm...yeah. There's a Senior and a Sophomore from my school. But that's pretty much it. Shyeah, the teacher was talking about short answers..."it should be like a miniskirt. Long enough to cover the subject, and short enough to keep it interesting." There was a moment of silence, then snickers and "oh my god..."s from the girls.

Work actually went quite well. Tanya and I were in good humor, though my boss was really tired and Jason seemed upset. There was a lot of shiznit today, since we were closed from the 4th to the 6th.

The guy I met from Todai (Japanese buffet restaurant) emailed me Saturday night a couple of hours after we met. So sweet. I emailed back. I wonder how he got my email, seeing it was on this site. But I asked him that too. I've been impatiently checking my email at every chance I get, but alas, none. What's that idiom for watching boiling water? I forgot. But I guess it's like that.

The performance went extremely well. We presented the Reduced Shakespeare Company's versions of Romeo and Juliet, Titus Andronicus, and all 16 of his comedies put into 1. I was Benvolio and the wall in Romeo and Juliet. I didn't take part of Titus Andronicus, but I was the duke (both of them) and a "fairy" in the 16 comedies. We also performed Tom Stoppard's 15 Minute Hamlet. I played Shakespeare and the ghost. Yes, it kicked ass. You may be asking why I play all these guy roles. Well, seeing I go to an all girls school, there's only 6 female parts...I get stuck into the male category. But it was quite fun. I was so tired though, I fell asleep in the restaurant where we ate dinner afterwards. But it's finished, the rest is silence.

On July 4, we went to a Filipino picnic. Saw Justin there, I think I scared the poor boy. I was telling him about a bunch of Filipinos I know/heard of…and there was that one guy *coughnerocough* that cut himself. As I was speaking, I had raised up my left arm in example. (I drew cuts on the performance last night with Miki’s red pencil. It was so cool!) Justin started backing away.

Me: No no no! It’s just stage make up!
Justin: Sure it is…
Me: Really! I used my friend’s red pencil last night!
Justin: You’re going to start your own cult or something…
Me: Hehe…I kinda already have…it’s the Cult of the Omega
Justin: What? See!
Me: But we don’t do anything! And I’m the only one…
Justin: You’re the only one in your own cult?!?!
Me: Hehe…yeah…

And we both proceeded to laugh. Yes, the Cult of the Omega. Omegas are so spifftacular. I had one on my italian charm bracelet thing, and my friend, Simoney, exclaimed “what’s this?! An omega?! Jade…are you part of a cult of omegas or something.” And I thought about that, and said “sure, wanna join?”

I kicked it with one of my Uncles today. He wants me to design a website for him, and his payment is however much money I ask for (I don't charge much, since I'm still not hugely advance) and web programming books. So, we went to Borders and I got some DHTML and JAVA references. An Uzumaki manga wandered into my grasp (it would,) but I didn't buy it. Perhaps I'll go back sometime and get it.

I spoke with a British accent for pretty much the whole day. I was quite proud that I finally acquired a British accent. I can do German, Italian, sometimes French, sometimes Spanish, and Indian. I really wanted to have British in my list, but for some reason, my tongue couldn't curl around it's melody and beat. After watching Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (with my Uncle,) I snatched on to their rhythm and spoke it until my mouth hurt. Indeed, my mouth started hurting. I'm used to the heavy accents.

Watched Wasabi with a few of my family. It's a French-Japanese made movie. I was quite amused. Yumi kicks the sword.

Celebrated my great granduncle's 100th birthday. At the restaurant, there was this guy....*sighs* oh shyeah, something about him caught my eye. Something about his facial expressions or disposition, perhaps. He was the table across, a little to the right. I don't know, I just know I couldn't take my eyes off of him.

Anyhow, I slipped him my site (yes, this very blog site) on a folded piece of paper as passed our table when he left. He took it and said "thank you." I could feel my heart beating so quickly when he slightly squeezed my index finger as he looked me in the eye. Ay...*bangs head on desk* Get him out of my mind!

It's not going to be 12:06 am when I post this. My grandpa's internet connection is down, but I really want to blog and get stuff off of my chest. So, right now I wonder if that boy had gone to my site, or like many other guys, slipped the paper into his pocket to be washed with his laundry and to never be seen again.

Besides, why would I want to get be interested, in any way, with a guy like that?

Today at work was pure hell. Well, actually, not pure hell- but a part of it, a very intense part. A few nights ago, I tagged an order for Thursday cuz Wed and Thurs was circled on the ticket, but Thurs was X-ed. So I thought she meant Thursday, so I tagged the order for Thursday. Cursed ticket, I should have tagged it for Wednesday just to be safe. Well, what do you know, the guy comes in for his order today. I ask him if he could pick up his order tommorow, and he says no- his wife is going to be on a plane tommorow at 5 am and she needs that order. Thank God Jason and Lauren were there. Together, we assembled everything- though none of the pressing for the materials were finished. (Later, I found out that we could've pressed them. I had thought the presser machines were turned off.) If my boss hears about this little event, she'll be really pissed...and probably fire me. She's a little shizzed already, about pretty much everything.

Other than that, the day went quite well. We celebrated my great grand-uncle's birthday. Yep yep. Theatre camp went quite well. The subject is from one of our plays- the Reduced Shakespeare Company's version of Romeo and Juliet, though I believe this line is actually from the play. We have a performance tommorow. It'll be a blast!

Now I'm hungry...Imagine that, I'm actually hungry. This morning, I wanted to throw up again, but my friends said I was getting into the habit. Shyeah, not good.

Damn, I have a headache. I owe Jason a favor.

Well, today went quite well, which pleases me muchly. Work went very smoothly, unlike yesterday's relm of hell.

My grandparents keep on feeding me, and it's making me sick. They make me eat four (4) freaking meals a day, and I usually eat only 2 during the summer (too busy.) I don't complain, I mean, they're my grandparents. But they're feeding me so much, that just looking at food of any kind makes me want to barf. Indeed, I did today. Before drama camp, I had the urge to get rid of all the food I had eaten for lunch. *cough* Shyeah, so I went to the bathroom and threw up. The finger down the throat actually works quite well, and it didn't hurt. My friends were like "OMG!!! Are you bolimic?" I just shrugged and said "only today." Hopefully only today, cuz I kind of want to do it again...

Probably I won't.

See Kimiko, it does sound like a pick up line.

Apparently, Kimiko also misses me. I feel quite special. *does the Deutchland dance* DEUTCHLAND! DEUTCHLAND! IS THE FAT-UH LAND!

I got the Blood: The Last Vampire Fanlist up on the wired. Yes, isn't that just spifftacular? But the geocities banners are annoying the hell out of me. Anyone care to host me? Shyeah, that's what I thought. Anyhow, go join now.

I heard this song at work today, and I started squealing. So I ran over to the radio and started blasting the song. By then, it was half-way finished, but I busted my groove anyways. Thank God no one else was in the store at that time.

Went TPing last night with my Mom (yes, my Mom) and her friends (note the italics.) We TPed Melanie's house on behalf of her mom. It was quite fun, though I was the only kid there. I was missing Abby.

Not much happened today...went to work. I got myself screwed over somehow. I guess I did the fluff & fold wrong. All I did was fold it and put it back in the bag where it came from cuz I didn't know what to do next. Guess I shouldn't have done that. Ah well.

I have to go mail that letter to Thalia sometime.

I've never read Hamlet before, but ever since my drama class started performing the Fifteen Minute Hamlet by Tom Stoppard, I've had this obsession with the character of Ophelia. There's something about her that's so appealing to me...maybe it's the theories about her madness and death. The mystery that surrounds her ways, her personality...just something. The Ophelia Fanlisting really set me off. I went to all the sites, downloaded all the songs, and looked at all the pictures I could find about her. Now I have a craving to read the whole Hamlet play.

Well, this song's a break from Evanescence. I really like it a lot. The voices and instrumental harmonies encompass the feeling of flowing water and Ophelia's hopeless madness. I suggest you download it now. Here are the lyrics if you want a taste of it. It's such a beautiful song. It makes me want to drown in a river myself. (No, that was not entirely sarcasm.)

I tried to write a poem about her. It's not finished, but it's coming along. I have a feeling that it will be a piece that cannot be completed in one night.

Oh yes, the subject is from one of the lines from her song.

Enough of Ophelia! Let us talk of something else. I'm going to open a Blood: The Last Vampire fanlist soon. Probably tommorow or the next day. It'll be spifftacular.

I dressed up Gothic Lolita style today. (Hehe, it's great to have links to refer to.) It was great. I somewhat modeled myself to that chick from Malice Mizer on the Gothic Lolita fanlist. I added a veil and kept my hair down though, with my side bangs out. Mom did my make-up, which was quite wise. Went to drama class. Everyone made some kind of comment (hey, I don't dress in pure black unless it's a funeral.) Here's some dialogue between Pat, our director, and me;

Pat: Jade...stand up.
Me: *stands up* I brought pants to change in...
Pat: You look like you're going to marry the grim reaper
Me: Hehe...The grim reaper's so hott...hehe
*weird looks from many*
Pat: *knowing nod* Ah, it's the scythe isn't it?
Me: Oh shyeah...I want to touch it...nehehehehe

*cough* shyeah, I didn't mean it to come out dirty like that. But it was fun. I must do it again sometime.

Shyeah...I need to stop listening to this cd. Once in a while, I'll listen to something else for an hour or two, but I just end up slipping it back in my cd player again.

Joined a lot of fanlists. Yes, quite a lot.

My parents cut off my piano lessons for the summer. My piano teacher just called and told me how my parents thought I wasn't as enthused about the piano as before. I started to cry...not sob cry...but tears were coming down. I was so mad, I didn't know what to say. My piano teacher was surprised as well, she was saying how I was really starting to blossom. We hung up and I totally broke down crying. Thank God my mother was asleep.

I love the piano so much...it's like my soul and my parents have snatched it away from me. It was like my lover in a way, I always took my emotions to it and it let my fingers skimmer along it to release everything I had inside of me. I just never liked playing in front of my parents or when they demanded it from me. It felt like they were asking me to make out in front of them. At least, that's how it felt to me. I could play in front of others, but my parents criticized me so harshly on pieces I was just starting that I just didn't want them as an audience. They didn't even know that I practiced when they wouldn't notice so they would just stop.

I'm still angsting about another love. Katie said that I should get a boyfriend to get my mind off of her. Shyeah, I should, but the few guys that I even have a slight interest in live out of state. Not to mention we're not staying in touch very well.

Not in love with any other girls right now, which I guess is alright. Katie also asked if I liked one gender more than the other. I thought about it, and said "no." I told her that there definitely was a differance between the two genders. Guys tend to be pretty stupid and really slow at catching in to things, while girls get really confused and over-analyze relationships When I'm with a girl, I can see through a guy's eyes in what they think of and vice versa when I'm with a guy. Now me on the other hand, sometimes I don't know what to think. Being a girl myself, I like the snuggling that girls enjoy oh so much. Yes, warmth is nice. But it's like there's something stronger in a guy.

Cualquier, I know I'll end up with a guy in the end...probably Filipino.

Subject's from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet. We're doing the Reduced Shakespeare Company's version at my drama class. Seeing there's barely an girls in this adaption (nurse & Juliet) I get to play Benvolio, and he happens to say this line to poor little Romeo (played by Hannah aka: Stevie,) not to mention it kind of fits the blog...which is a miracle in itself. Pat's making me use my Italian accent. I swear, he loves my accents like a fox. "Yes! You can be a hip Italian guy!" Yes, go hip Italian guys. Purrrr...

Ah yes, I love this cd. My favorite song on it is "Tourniquet." Its lyrics are sheer poetic eloquence. I think this is the main misinterpreted song of why people think they're a Christian band. Riiiight...they need to go look up the definition of tourniquet.

Went to two parties last night. First one was a graduation party. That one lacked wang. It was my grandpa's cousin's son's highschool grad party. We only stayed for 2 hours. The second was a baptism reception at the family's house. Yes, little Caitlin. She's so cute! Bust a Groove was a must- though we only played for a couple of hours. Alan's back from Cali. His hair's not orange anymore. It made me laugh...in the inside. It has red highlights. Anyways, we didn't really talk throughout the whole party until when we started leaving. Yep, 3 times, each about 5 mins long. He's quite charming, except for the fact that he was playing DOA Extreme Beach Volleyball. I wanted to burn that game so badly. (Sorry, more digressions.) Our moms have been pairing us up ever since we were 3. The last time I saw him (about 2 years ago,) I couldn't stand him. But that was 2 years ago. Now he's just...Alan.

I gave him this blog URL. I smacked myself up the head for giving him something so personal so soon. But it's okay, cuz he slipped it into one of his jean pockets and probably forgot about it already. He gave me his email, so I emailed him and just said "hi." Literally. I would like to see him again, and talk for more than 15 minutes. Shyeah, that'd be nice. His mom has my phone number, and that makes me laugh...out loud.

Updated Quill Driving. I don't usually post updates, but I just felt like it tonight. If you've never visited my writings' site, it has poems, essays, and short stories- both written and collected.

Notice the new layout? Shyeah, that's what I thought. I stole the image from Penny Arcade, a gaming online comic. It depicts how I feel about Kimiko in Germany *coughsauerkrautcough* Hehe. Yes, I feel oh so alone without her. (I can't tell if that was sarcasm or not. Probably both.) The interesting thing is, we are Tycho and Gabe. Well, not literally. But we act like them a lot. It's not even funny. A lot of their comic strips are actual/would be scenarios of Kimiko (Tycho) and me (Gabe.)

Ah yes...the subject. Before Kimiko left, I was driving her insane cuz I kept on saying "Icht Nicht Mein Hand" without the "da." Hehe...Then I took it a step up and said "Soy Icht Nicht My Hand." She shrieked "there isn't even the word soy in the German language! It has too many syllables!" That made me laugh also.