Tech Support – Computer Humor

Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.

AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard
to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic
bag the mouse was packaged in.

Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective diskettes.
A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along with photocopies
of the floppies.

Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to fax
anything. After 40 minutes of failed problem solving it was discovered
the man was trying to fax a piece of paper by holding it in front of the
monitor screen and hitting the "send" key.

A confused caller to IBM was having troubles printing documents.  He
told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer".
The user had also tried turning the computer screen to face the printer –
but that his computer still couldn't "see" the printer.

An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support couldn't get her
new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring the computer was plugged
in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power
button.  Her response, "I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and
nothing happens."   The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.

True story from a Novell NetWare SysOp:
Caller: "Hello, is this Tech Support?"
Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
period. How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am.
Did you receive this as part of a promotion, at a trade show? How did
you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a
promotional. It just has '4X' on it." At this point the Tech Rep had
to mute the caller, because he was laughing too hard. The caller
had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder.

Another IBM customer had trouble installing software and rang for
Support. "I put in the first disk, and that was OK. It said to put in the
second disk, and I had some problems with the disk. When it said to
put in the third disk - I couldn't even fit it in."  The user hadn't
realized that "Insert Disk 2" meant to remove Disk “1” first.

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