Prologue
She had been crying.
She was about eight.
Mother sighing in the drivers’ seat next to her. “Juri I’m sorry but you can’t go to that house any more.” She spoke of it as though it were a prision or something.
“Why?” He was fun to play with, he was like her best friend and his mother was more than glad to watch them while Juri’s mother was at work.
She hadn’t seen her mother’s eyes, they were narrowed on the road and didn’t glance sideways at her daughter as she drove. “I know you had a good time with him but I just don’t want you around that woman any longer.” Spitting the words as though they were a curse.
But Juri could see her mother’s mouth, drawn into an angry red line. “I don’t want to discuss it, it’s none of your concern. Just stop crying, look I’ll buy you that necklace you wanted.” Her mother sighed, she looked really tired. Where would they go now when she was working?
She didn’t want the necklace.
“But why….she was nice.”
Settled in the back seat, Juri’s sister was swinging her legs back and forth, occasionally hitting Juri’s seat with her foot. She giggled mischivously. She was thirteen, and she knew everything. “It’s because I caught her in the hallway kissing her girlfriend—“
“Hikami!” Their mother almost did turn all the way around, Juri’s eyes widened as she swerved to miss the oncoming cars. “You be quiet! I don’t want to hear you talking about it in front of her, do you understand? Not to your sister. We’ll talk to your father about it when he gets home, alright? Not a word until then.”
“Alright.” Her sister’s voice sounded subdued from the back.
Juri was trying to sort things out…girlfriend…well that was different but…what was the big deal? She’d kissed Shiori on the cheek before and no one got upset. To her mind it certainly didn’t explain why she was getting ripped away from one of her best friends.
“But he lives there and he seems okay, he’s so nice—“ she said, struggling not to cry again.
Her mother sighed, an angry hiss. “That poor child, growing up with a mother like that… I’m sorry Juri you just can’t see him any more. I won’t have you exposed to that.” Her mother shivered…was she cold? “Disgusting. It just shouldn’t be allowed, I’m surprised they haven’t taken him away.” The way she said it made a few fresh tears rush down Juri’s cheeks. She wasn’t, she was nice…
Her mother’s knuckles tightened on the steering wheel. “Hikami….Juri.” She looked right at her again, Juri wished she’d watch the traffic. “Did she touch you?”
Well she was nice…she hugged her and stuff when they came in after school, always smiling and had something for them to eat… but her mother had such a dark _expression Juri figured the best answer would be to shake her head.
“No it wasn’t like that Mom. Really.” Hikami said quietly from the back.
Her mother let out a sigh of relief and concentrated on the road again.
Hikami, quiet for a moment, started giggling from the back, kicking Juri’s seat all the harder. Juri frowned and rubbed her back. She could be so mean sometimes. “Juriiiiii….you’re just are upset because you had a crush on him!”
Her face was burning. “I do not,” she said gruffly, crossing her arms.
“You do too, you so do!”
“I do not!”
“Girls!” Their mother closed her eyes a second and took her hand off of the wheel an instant to cut her hand through the air in a silencing gesture. “I’ve had it. Now we’ve had enough today with that horrid woman I want you both to settle down and behave. Do you hear me?”
Silence, except for the quiet sobbing.
“Juri stop crying. Crying about it won’t solve anything. Look I’m going to put you in a new school, one where you can stay there all the time so I won’t have to find a babysitter for you. You tested so well I was able to get you into one of the best. Ohtori Academy, won’t your father be proud of you when he finds out? And your little friend goes there, Shiori. You can spend time with her.”
Juri sniffed. “Shiori?” she said brightly.
Her mother smiled for the first time since they’d gotten into the car. “That’s right. She’ll be a good replacement for him.”
Juri frowned… it felt like part of her that moment was shriveling up like a dried out apple core, a black place inside of her that wasn’t allowed to breath and live and grow. Little dark place.
“But you said..” she began very quietly. “You said it shouldn’t be allowed. To do that. How can she replace him?”
Her mother looked confused a moment before she smiled indulgently. “Oh Juri it isn’t like that, it isn’t the same thing.” Juri blinked. It…wasn’t? It felt the same, even if that part of it was that dark place she wasn’t allowed to touch.
Reaching over, her fingers ran through her curling orange hair. A comfort. “Don’t worry about it, okay? We’ll talk about it when you’re older.”
That was the last time it was ever mentioned.