| 10. | Roseanne now claims to be alien abductee |
| 9. | Cast of "Baywatch" actually cloned from leftover parts of Cher! |
| 8. | "CBS Evening News" set to replace Connie Chung with a Yeti |
| 7. | Jay Leno says his giant chin is the result of government experiments |
| 6. | "Larry King Live" changing name to "Close Encounters of the Larry Kind" |
| 5. | Mysterious next-door neighbor on "Home Improvement" revealed to be Deep Throat |
| 4. | On "Seinfeld," Kramer finds an alien implant in his hair |
| 3. | Principal Skinner relates an out-of-body experience he had in Vietnam on a very special episode of "The Simpsons" |
| 2. | Regis will look for aliens while Kathie Lee handles the autopsies |
| 1. | Dr. Niles Crane will start setting fires with the power of his mind! |
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