Get your own Free Home PageOkay, so here's the deal. A while back there was a pilot for a sitcom starring Andrew Dice Clay and Ralph "Why am I acting alongside this guy?" Macchio. I don't know much about it, but I do know that it wasn't picked up and fell into television obscurity. Recently, I've received an enormous amount of e-mails ("enormous amount" = "two") from young women who have been receiving self-destructive copies of this tape in the mail. Concerned that some sort of must-see TV stalker is on the loose, they watched the copies and sent me their assessments. Some company is in the process of targeting young women with Andrew Dice Clay sitcoms. Beware! Anyway, here's the scoop on Ralph's short-lived sitcom...
From Bob:
Juliana and Anita summed it up very well. It had a copyright date of 1994 in the closing credits which fits in with the careers of the main actors. Andrew Clay (minus the "Dice") was his name when he attempted to go legit with a family sitcom or two (one co-starring Cathy Moriarty) circa 1995-1997. The script was unbelieveably bad and the laugh track was turned up to compensate for it. Ralph's father and the Italian bakery cook were very bad stereotypes; Clay had a couple of lines of dialogue as the vulgar undertaker (it was a small role); Anita Barone acted as though she were in an after-school production. Only Ralph looked like a real actor, though his character had nothing worthwhile to say. The role could've been played by Scott Baio or Robbie Benson without hurting anything. I was left with the idea that if the actors had abandoned their scripts and just ad libbed for 22 minutes, the show would have been improved. Another TV fantasy: Anita is a grad student and Ralph temps so that he can have "time for his writing." They have a three year old. And they live in a very fine and modern apartment, presumably in New York City. How much do temps make in New York?! The tape does erase as it plays. Had I known about this website, I would've tried to dub a copy as I watched it to send in. They weren't just inflicting this on women ages 18-34 either; I'm an old man of 44 and they coveted my opinions too. Finally, there hasn't been a tweak invented which could've raised this show to the level of a syndicated Suzanne Somers' sitcom; it was really embarrassing to watch.
From Juliana:
Okay, so this company called me and asked me to watch this tape (they sent it express mail) and fill out all these survey questions. So, I get it in the mail, pop it in the vcr, and it's this cheesy but watchable sitcom called "Ties that Bind." It starts Ralph as this 24 year old who's married to this woman and they have a 3 year old. His parents are prominent characters, and his dad owns a bakery. Ralph stays at home to write, and decided he's going to work in the bakery for a while to make extra $$. This is they weird thing, Ralph's cousin is played by Andrew Dice Clay, but he's billed as Andrew Clay. So, I don't know if this sitcom has been picked up by a network or what, but it was definitely interesting. I'm curious to see if it makes it anywhere. I would send it to you, but the tape erases as it plays. Weird, huh?
From Anita:
You seemed interested in news about "The Ralph Macchio Show." I saw one version of it a few weeks ago, and it was called "Ties that Bind". I'm sorry I don't remember a whole lot about it because it was a very forgettable sitcom. A marketing firm sent me a cassette of it for my opinion (as a "woman between the age of 18 and 34"), and the tape was designed to erase itself as it played. Ralph played an aspiring writer struggling to make ends meet with his wife (Anita Barone) and a young child. It seemed to be trying to copy the formula of "Everybody Loves Raymond", but the dialogue was boring and the story was trite. His parents were played by Robert Costanzo and Micole Mercurio, and Dad was trying to get Ralph to give up his dreams and work in the family bakery. The "wacky sidekicks" were played stereotypically by Luigi Amodeo and Andrew Dice Clay. Lots of Italian jokes, some toilet humor, but mostly an attempt to warm our hearts with sappy family values and very conventional themes. Ralph gave a solid performance and can certainly carry a sitcom, so I hope they can "tweak" the pilot enough to make it watchable. I raved about the cast but gave "thumbs down" to everything else about it. They gave no clue about who's behind the show, except I remember Ralph was billed as "executive producer" (or was it "executive consultant"?), and the writer and producers were familiar names from successful sitcoms like "Cheers", but their names escape me now. Just thought you might like to know about it. You're to be congratulated for keeping your site so up-to-date.
Get your own Free Home Page