My Final Poem
(conitnued)

I am starting to not feel right when with Kare Bear,
I feel although I am with her, she isn't exactly there,
I wish I could see all my old friends another time,
Doing drugs is no longer my illegal crime,
I have even stopped partying, I don't drink,
I was an idiot before, I just didn't think,
Phillip and I are no longer brothers,
I now no longer claim my other mothers,
I now kind of keep to myself, and don't say much,
Like how I dream of my death, and such,
Will I ever get to see my friends, before I die?
Will they hurt me again and make me cry?
I am not as tough as I try to be,
No one knows what it is like to be me,
Telling of my suicidalness was a cry of help,
It looks to me like I am going to have cure myself,
Well, now Phillip has become a rat,
I really don't care about that,
A month after Phillip ratted, I am in danger,
All of my old friends, are now just a stranger,
I am going to be go Virginia for Memorial day,
Mike graduates that weekend, but I am not going any way,
I am looking forward to the reunion, for it should be fun,
I will get to see my real friends, who are my number one,
Well, I depart from here come tomorrow,
Hopefully, the events there will cure my sorrow,
I am now back from Virginia, and I am so glad,
I am not dead, but yet I am still sad,
I do have an inner cheer, but it isn't the same,
I am now single, and I feel so much pain,
Inner turmoil, causing change upon my life,
Realizing I will be alone forever, and won't get a wife,
Either my poems or my life will be no more,
I realize without  either of them I can't soar,
My poems relieve my darkness, and stress,
So without writing poems, my life would be a mess,
Yet, without my life I would not be,
I just wish that everyone around could see,
I am nothing, and my life will never be good,
So why not go out and yell at the hood,
Let them end my life, and my pain,
While departing on my eternal journey, it shall rain,
The rain to represent my uncried tears,
Ending all of my dark emotions and hidden fears,
All of my yesterdays will end at dawn,
Making my past and memories, all, gone,
Shaffer, Faye, Dex, Reese, Em, Mon,
The twins, Mike, Phil, Tony, Jon,
Meagan, Amanda, Chris, Andy, Karen,
Bob, Bill, Justin, Ryan, Pam, Darrin,
Lindsey, Emma, Tyson, Kailee, Gary,
Rosemary, Kristy, Amber, Bryan, Mary,
Shawn, Michelle, Tiffany, James, Brandy,
Joe, Dave, Rikki, Onyx, Josh, Randy,
Sarah, Ginny, Tasha, Holli, Rich,
Rob, Jillian, Acacia, Mom, Dad, Mitch,
Those I didn't mention, and all those above,
Just know, you all have an equal amount of my love,
I am sorry ahead of time for what I will do,
Just know wherever I go I will be watching you,
Jason Keller, Daniel Roark, and Uncle Pete,
Just know that soon we shall all be able to meet,
I would have bet my life that I had total control,
Now I realize contrary to popular belief, I didn't at all,
Mental and Physical pain have swallowed me,
So to all those who have ever followed me,
Find another path, for mine leads to an eternal night,
I'm sure you can find a path that has an eternal light,
Don't take my road, for it gives you nothing but pain,
Also insanity, loneliness, and an endless shame,
Spend your life sober, a little serious, but with a lot of joking,
Don't get hooked on the drinking, smoking, or on the toking,
Get together with friends, work hard, study, and succeed,
Keep informed on the world around you, always do a good deed,
Please do not go and take this at all wrong,
For this is a new beginning, not a farewell song,
Depression and suicide shall never get another rhyme,
I conclude my life, in darkness, with the end of this line!