My Final Poem
(conitnued)

I've had a lot of relationships but this isn't the same,
All the others were my fault, I was to blame,
From parties and drugs, to cheating and lying,
Resulting in hating, resulting in crying,
The past has taught me what I need to know,
It revealed it isn't responsible for how my life will go,
I was a cheating, immature, suicidal liar,
I was a psycho who loved playing with fire,
I will stay faithful, and never lie,
I will be happy, and never want to die,
If you think of your death, you can't live a full life,
If you think of happiness, you deal with less strife,
Phillip and I have only hung out once this year,
Losing his friendship, I used to always fear,
Now I just don't even really care,
For now, I have my little Kare Bear,
As I see one friendship come to the end,
I get lucky, and get an awesome girlfriend,
Work has been going really good,
Everything has been going as it should,
i don't think Karen and I will last too long,
The whole situation just feels wrong,
Christianity, I feel, I have taken from a few,
My mind is no good, and I don't know what to do,
My death will be like my life, all alone,
So many things about me will never be known,
My teacher died of cancer, and I wonder why,
Why God chose him, and not someone evil like I,
My life is just like my room a big mess,
I am just dealing with so much stress,
My ex, that I still kind of love, told me to go ahead and die,
It hurt so bad, I about broke down started to cry,
If that is what she wants, than she will get her way,
I am just trying to decide on which day,
Maybe it could be a present on her birthday, March eight,
Us getting married just wasn't our fate,
I am supposed to die young and alone,
I wish I could just go and get totally blown,
Everything that happens is always my fault,
All my secrets will stayed locked up in my vault,
Shaffer took the poem "The day I died" all wrong,
He made sound evil and put me in a little song,
I meant by the poem, he was my only friend,
Who wouldn't let my come to the end,
I guess I was wrong because no one cares if I die,
Everyone says they care, but it is just a lie,
Sarah wanted to know what was in my head,
I didn't tell her of how I might soon be dead,
I will keep everything in until I am no more,
I will keep it in until my insides are sore,
I have never experienced the very rare,
Lover or friend that would actually care,
To all those "friends" I am sorry it is going to end this way,
But my skies have become a permanent gray,
The only person that could brighten my every day,
Has turned her back to me and walked away,
Her attitude started becoming a fright,
Karen and I are going to have time alone tonight,
Karen and I had some good old clean fun,
She is definitely moving up to my number one,
I want to be able to go into her happy little mind,
I want to see what all I will be able to find,
She makes me so happy, that I lose my mind,
i forget about my every single bind,
I have more friends than I thought, I have three,
They are, of course, Myself, ,I and me,
It isn't important to you who they are,
One is my grilfriend, The fallingstarr,
Another is a girl and the other a guy,
For any of those three I would die,
I am not saying i want to be dead,
For Karen is tightening the screws in my head,
She probably doesn't even know,
All I have needed is care and love so,
Care is already there, and I hope love is on the way,
She clears my mind, leaving me nothing to say,
She is the best woman I know, and makes me feel great,
In my heart I am hoping and praying that she is my soul mate,
She's all I ever wanted, and has the personality I need,
She got a quality that makes me want to succeed,
She is so beautiful and body is so wow,
The love I have serarched for, I have found now,