July 26th

I haven't written anything in the journal for a week. Not that I didn't really have anything to say. I've been busy. This is a good sign, I think. I'm attending to my responsibilites, working around the house and garden more, and even recreating a little. I decided to write a sports article for the local paper called "Golfaholics" about the annual golf tournament held in our fair city. I believe however, that it is universally applicable.

Yesterday, I was out on the lake before my doctor's appointment. My friends, Eric and Wendy took us, Jane, Bryn and myself on a 24-foot pontoon boat for a tour of the lake and some swimming. I got to see first hand and intimately what our drinking water looks like. The lake is slightly murky. There are many motorboats speeding around the water leaving oil on the surface. Somehow all the recreation seems counter-productive to keeping drinking water safe, yet there you have it, the classic dilemna of the modern day-how do you have all the freedom and fun you want and maintain an optimum state of health?

After swimming and boating, it's off to the doctor's office for my weekly blood test, wet bathing suit and all. Today they will draw blood from the port in my left arm and then flush the port to be certain there is no clotting or other pernicious thing going on with it. I have made up my mind to ask D. Thai if I can have the port removed. He responds by saying that he'd like to see the results of the blood test first. He is generally in agreement with me though.

I've got it figured this way. Chances are 90% I won't need a second treatment. If I do, there is an alternative way the chemical can be administered. I'm concerned that the port may do some lasting, or at least lingering damage, to the nerves in my lower arm. It's still somewhat numb and tingling at times near where you would take the pulse. I'm willing to take a risk on this.

The results of the blood test come in. More good news! My white blood count is up again. This time it has risen a full point and two tenths. Even still, I am not yet up to what would be considered the low end of normal blood. I'm certainly approaching that however. Every week it seems Dr. Thai has to remind me that it will take several weeks for the blood to regain normalcy. I am impatient. I haven't been off the chemotherapy for three weeks yet.

Dr. Thai agrees, based on the test, that I can have the port removed. He gives me a note for Dr. Keen that says succinctly "May remove port." Those are three sweet words to me. I suppose of all the discomforts and disagreeable aspects of this illness and its treatment, this port in my arm and its side effects has to rank at the top. It will be just fine to have it behind me.

So this is good. Meanwhile, I continue vitamin thereapy, eating well, getting more exercise, visiting with friends, and planning my canoe trip to the San Juan River in southern Utah. See, it's my goal to be well enough by August 22nd to go on this wlderness adventure with my expedition friends. There is a group of four of us, we call ourselves El Groupo Loco, who travel to exotic locales for adventure. In 1989 we went to the jungles of Ecuador to explore a tributary of the Amazon River. In 1995 we went to Alaska within the Arctic Circle and canoed for a week on the pristine Noatak River. And now we want to canoe the rough San Juan. There are many ancient Indian sites in the side canyons that we'd like to see and think about. All of us share a fascination with early American people. This river travels through some of the most dramatic and geologically interesting land this country has to offer. Want to go?

I'm greatly encouraged by the way I feel. I made it through the whole day without a nap, though in the waiting room at the doctor's I certainly could have drifted off if a couch had been handy. I haven't done this since the chemotherapy. Nevertheless, I think it indicates a return of stamina. Not a flood of it, but a trickle. It's the direction of the flow that counts. I expect to get stronger each day.

July 29th