| A gasp when through the room at Catherine's revelation and then stillness settled over them. William looked at his wife confusion written on his face. "Rob could have passed on the recessive gene to cause the heart defect." She said as she took her handkerchief and wiped her eyes. Jackie seeing her distress went to her side. "You don't have to do this now, Catherine," Jackie put her arm around the woman's shoulders. "Yes I do. I lost a child before Garrett was born. It was a congenital heart defect too. The doctor said it could happen again, but I was determined to have a family. Twice I was blessed with two healthy sons after that. But they told me the problem could be passed on in Garrett and Rob. I know I should have said something but when Colby seemed to be doing so well and nothing was said about any problems, I just kept quiet. And now I've lost my grandson. I should have come forward and maybe they could have monitored her more closely and…" She broke down and Jackie led her to the sofa and sat with her as she quietly mourned her loss. "This is absurd." William stood in front of her demanding an explanation. She lifted her face and glared at him. "No it's not William. We both have a history of heart disease. It put our sons and their children at risk. And the added stress that you caused to Colby only aggravated a very serious condition. We're to blame, not Colby." She dabbed her eyes. "No!" William screamed at her. "Yes, William it's time to admit your part in all this." He didn't respond. "I suggest you and Garrett leave. Your presence here is unwelcome." He went to protest by she stopped him. "Leave William. You both disgust me." She lowered her head and William just stood there. In all their years together she had never spoken to him the way she just had, with such animosity. He tried to say something but the words wouldn't come out. He shook his head. There was nothing he could do here anyway. He turned and Garrett followed him to the elevator. Barbara came and sat next to her and asked if she needed anything. Catherine told her she was fine and encouraged Jackie to go to Brian. He needed her now. She came and put her arm around his shoulder. "You okay?" she asked him. He shrugged. "Why? Mom. Why?" "I don't know, Brian. We can't question why. There was a reason for all this, Brian, a greater purpose." He looked at her, his eyes bloodshot from the tears he cried. "How am I going to help her? That baby meant everything to her. She told me so." He sighed. "Brian listen to me. If you love her," he shot his head up, "and I know you do, you will find a way to give her what she needs. And you need to be prepared for her to reject you and your help. This is going to come as a shock and Colby will need time to deal with this grief privately. Just be patient." They went and sat together on the sofa. Brian, with his head lowered in his hands and Jackie there beside him. ~*~*~*~*~*~*~ That mist again, why was it always there clouding her vision. She pushed at it, but it wouldn't go away. Then as if a curtain had been pulled aside it separated and the images were clear. They were walking away from her and she called out but they didn't respond. She called again but the mist began to return and right before it engulfed her she saw the man turn as well as the child holding his hand. They waved to her and disappeared into the fog. She tried to run to them, but voices intruded, they were talking about her. Her head hurt and her body felt it had been beaten. She ached all over. The hours moved slowly. They all took turns going to the cafeteria, but food was the last thing Brian wanted or needed. His mind and heart were with Colby. So he sipped at the cup of coffee as he stared off wondering how they would get through this heartbreak. How Colby would take the news was all he thought about. She would heal physically, but the news of the baby would rock her emotionally. Brian was worried that it could send her spiraling into the depths of despair. He didn't know how he could help. His mother was right. She may withdraw from him and he had to be prepared to face that, but could he. She had become the essence of his life and his future course saw her there with him. Would he be able to let her go? He didn't want to think about it. It was close to one in the morning when a nurse came to tell them that Colby was beginning to wake. The doctor opened the door. A nurse was checking the monitor. "I got paged. Has there been a change?" He asked as he came to Colby's side. He checked her pulse and looked in her eyes. "She's beginning to rouse, doctor. There's been movement and she called out." The nurse ripped the tape from the machine and handed it to him. He nodded his head pleased with the numbers. "Stay with her. I need to talk with the family. I'll be right outside if you need me." The nurse nodded as the doctor walked outside. The three of them approached the doctor, apprehension written on their faces. "Catherine," he nodded at the others, "she's coming to. I don't have to tell you how hard this is going to be. I have no idea how to tell her yet. Two tragedies of this magnitude in one year will be more than she can bear." He took a breath. "I've notified a counselor to be available for her. And all of you will have to use extreme care and give her time to heal." The doctor looked directly at Brian. "And you young man will have the hardest task. It's been known that women push their husbands or lovers away after a loss of this nature. You will need to be understanding of her pain and step back when needed." Brian slowly nodded already dreading the moment when Colby would shun his advances. "Now, if you're ready, we'll…" A blood-curdling scream came from inside Colby's room. She felt the pressure on her wrist. The voices kept fading in and out. She tried to move but the aches in her body kept her still. Images floated through her mind as Colby tried to piece together what had happened. She remembered being in the car. She had been talking to someone and then there was a noise. Suddenly Colby remembered William and the truck and then…. The scream left her mouth as her hand went to her flat stomach. As the doctor pushed open the door Colby was begging the nurse, "Please tell me," she demanded of the nurse. "Please!" The words came out in a screech. She ripped the IV from her arm, blood streaming down to her wrist. She scrambled to get off the bed, wailing as pain tore through her abdomen and chest, as small spots of blood stained her gown. Both the doctor and nurse subdued her and got her back in the bed. "Please my baby, where's my baby?" Tears ran down her cheeks as her family and friends stood by with their own tears in their eyes. "Please," she sobbed, her body shaking, as the nurse tried to tend to her arm. The doctor looked at the nurse. "What happened?" Colby fought against him as he tried to check her sutures. She had torn them and they would need to be repaired. The nurse related what happened. He looked to get confirmation about the baby. The nurse shook her head. Colby still needed to be told. He let out a breath and told the nurse, "One milliliter, stat." The nurse nodded and went to get the medication. "Colby, calm down." He urged her. She tried to push him away but her arm was clamped down to keep the new IV in place. "Please tell me. Where's the baby." Colby grabbed the lapel of his coat with her hand and pulled him towards her. "Where's my baby?" she yelled at him at the top of her lungs. Catherine seeing his distress came to Colby's bedside. "Colby, dear," she said gently holding her own tears at bay. "Catherine, my baby, tell me about the baby. Tell them to bring me my baby." Catherine saw her desperation and it cut through her like a knife. Her eyes filled and she looked at the doctor. Colby had to be told but how. "Colby," the doctor said slowly, "the accident caused you to go into labor but the baby," he cleared his throat as she watched a shadow cross his face. "The baby was in distress and we knew we would have to take him." Colby's face lit up. "I had a little boy?" She turned and smiled at Catherine, "I had a little boy." Catherine nodded holding back the flow of tears ready to spill down her cheeks. "Yes, Colby, you had a boy," the doctor continued. "But," he hesitated and Colby knew there was a problem. Brian and Barbara stood at the end of her bed. Brian's hands were clammy as his nerves wound tight inside him. She needed to know, tell her, he thought as the doctor paused. "But what?" she asked. "Is he in the nursery. Can you get him and bring him to me? I want to see him." Everyone seemed so sad, she thought. Brian and Barbara hadn't said a word just stood there watching and waiting. What was going on? "Colby, he, he was… the stress from the accident and the labor were too much for him and his…" Colby watched the doctor and suddenly those images in her subconscious weren't dreams they was real. Rob, the child, the mist, all of it had told her something. "The baby," tears rolled down her cheeks. "The baby didn't make it Colby. I'm sorry. His heart gave out. We did everything we could." The doctor stepped back and Barbara came to her side. She held her hand as Catherine held the other. "My baby, my baby," she rocked her head back and forth. "Oh God, my baby is…" She let out a deep sob. Brian felt helpless as he watched the three women cry for the loss of Colby's child. Tears rolled down his cheeks too and he slowly slipped from the room leaving them. Brian stood outside the room. He didn't belong here right now. Colby needed family and her close friends. He was neither. He recalled the doctor's words, about Colby rejecting him. He was neither husband nor lover. Brian felt his chances with her slip further away. He heard the door open and Barbara called to him. "Go in and sit with her for a minute. The nurse has given her something to relax her and make her sleep. Go before she won't know you're there." He stared blankly at her and shook his head. "I don't belong here Barbara. She doesn't need me." His voice was filled with despair. "Yes she does. Tell her how you feel. Let her know that you'll be there for her." She took his arm as she opened the door. "How I feel?" His voice grew a bit louder and the nurses at the station put their fingers to their lips. "She just lost her child," he whispered, and "I feel like I lost it too. I love her and I loved that baby. I had hoped that the three of us…" his voice trailed off. "I know Brian. Go to her. Just tell her you care and you'll help her, be there for her." Barbara pushed the door back further and pushed him inside. Catherine looked up and urged him to Colby's side. "She's getting groggy. Stay till she falls asleep." She hugged him and left the room. She looked so small and fragile lying there. Her head wrapped up with gauze and her face so pale. Tears still fell on her cheeks even though her eyes were closed. Brian sat next to her and took her hand in his, rubbing his thumb slowly back and forth. Colby opened her heavy lids. She tried to speak but Brian touched his finger tips to her lips. "Shh don't talk. Rest Colby. You need to rest." His words were barely a whisper. "The baby," she murmured, tears continuing to spill down her face. "I know. I'm so sorry." He brushed the tears from her cheeks and then he brushed his own away. A soft sob shook her body as sleep overtook her again. He sat and just held her hand. His heart aching for her. How long he sat there Brian didn't know. He rested his head on the bed next to her as he listened to her steady breathing. He felt a hand on his shoulder and looked up to see the doctor standing next to him. He told him to go home and get some sleep. Colby would probably sleep until morning and he needed to see to her sutures. Brian leaned over and kissed her cheek and left. As the three of them walked down the hall, Jackie looked up. She stood and went to Brian. She took him in her arms and he cried like a small child. "I'm going to lose her, mom. I'm going to lose her." "Let's go home. You need to sleep." She said goodnight to everyone and she and Brian left. |