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Fox Chase 's own Beatles cover band The Savoy Truffles has decided to terminate their musical union. According to inside sources, the break up is being attributed to the increased presence of Jack Stalin 's (vocals, rhythm guitar) girlfriend, Yolanda Onoralski. "She always fucking calls him on his cell phone when we're rehearsing," said a frustrated Liam Eastman (vocals, bass), "The White Album isn't going to learn itself. " He has asked the press not to make any Yoko factor allusions to the situation, primarily because Yolanda's association with Japanese culture begins and ends with her obsession with "that stupid Sailor Moon show."

Tensions have been running high in the group for at least the past week, ever since Eastman discovered a copy of DJ Shadow 's "The Grey Album" in Stalin's car. Also, Eastman has been campaigning for the group to return to its "original basic rock sounds" while Stalin insists that the ir status as a garage cover band pretty much implied all they will have is a basic rock sound. Harold Garfield (lead guitarist) expressed sorrow over the band 's breakup. "I haven't been this broken up since our original bassist Stewie died." He then resume d inhaling the cloud of marijuana smoke hovering in his parent 's basement.

The group formed in late 2001 when Eastman and Stalin met in study hall. Sharing their mutual hatred of the artsy, innovative music currently saturating the market, they decided to form a band of their own that would emulate that "classic sturdy" sound the Beatles perfected. Eventually, they decided it would be easier to simply do covers. After recruiting Garfield and Simon Wurst (charismatic drummer) from going nowhere punk bands, they began their music career turning out such brilliant CD-Rs as "Cover of Beatles Song For Sale For Free," "Pistol," "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Punks Club Band," and "Let It Beep," a misguided attempt to give the Beatles a techno edge.

The group toured heavily in their own and surrounding neighborhoods early on, but were forced to stop when Wurst 's mom sold her van, leaving them without a safe way to transport their minimal but capable equipment. Their last known performance was on the roof of Garfield's house appr oximately a month ago, which was not so much a signal of rebellious artistic expression as it was a side effect of being really, really stoned.

There is speculation that band members will move onto solo cover bands. "I don't know if I'm ready for Wings yet. I might just dabble with McCartney's solo songs. I really like that one from the Vanilla Sky soundtrack," reported Eastman, "As for that fuck-o Jack-o, I guess he can call his first solo album 'Still a Virgin.'" Ownership of the group's record label, Applecore, will most likely fall to Eastman as most of its business is conducted in his one bedroom apartment. Fortunately for fans, the group will have one posthumous release, the "Ringo Road EP," featuring covers of both Ringo's notable songs with The Beatles and all of his substantial solo work. Perhaps guitarist Garfield summed up the Savoy Truffles' legacy the best, "I am the walrus, dude!" His comment was then followed by an inexplicable fit of laughter.