People Whose Hair Will Take Over the World
Note: This list is by no means complete! If you have discovered someone in on Jane's evil plots and have the hair to prove it, please let me know! (My email is below)
* Jane Seymour
Okay, I love the actress dearly. But did you see the size of her hair in the Pimpernel? I mean, does she really expect us to believe that that's normal?!?
I only hope that the loss of that monstrosity means that she has since reformed.
* Anthony Andrews
And I'm not even really talking Pimpernel here. You want to see Anthony with hair? Watch "Sparkling Cyanide". You'll be laughing really hard... until you realize just what all that hair means...
* Ropespierre (A & E)
Okay, do I even need to explain this one?
* Chauvelin
Okay, this is an odd one. I think, for the most part, Chauvie is Miracle-Gro free. I mean, despite the fact that he thinks he can win against Percy, he does seem to be extremely intelligent. The only thing bringing him into question is the musical Chauvie. In the words of the ever immortal Doug Sills, "Yes, and Tarzan here will be collecting donations in the lobby..." Make your own conclusions.
* Justin Timberlake and Britney Spears
Check out the pop music section for this one. I really don't feel like explaining it again.
* Elijah Woods
If you've ever seen the movie "Deep Impact", you'll know what I'm talking about...
* Armand Assanti
When we had to watch "The Odyssey" in English, Mlle Sills and I were most delighted to see that there was someone in it named Armand. Until we noticed his hair... *Duh, duh, duh...*
* The Cowboy from the Store
You probably shouldn't ask about this one. All I'll say is to beware of men wearing cowboy hats (to cover the afros) and buying ice cream in small stores. Mlle. Sills and I learned this the hard way...
Okay, in truth, we didn't. But we could see the gleam in his eye that he really wanted to offer us some tasty green candy. I bet he just didn't have any on hand...
We were lucky to escape with our lives, babe!