In This Life
by Jennifer
Episodes 1 - 5
A continuing alternate Jack and Jennifer story, which starts in October 2000... While this borrows some of the elements from the show right now, the storyline will go in a vastly different direction that what is currently being played out. Because this is an alt story, I've taken many liberties with their backstory during the years 1993-2000, so forget everything that happened once Matthew Ashford stopped playing the role of Jack...
Special thanks to Denise, who has helped me tremendously by being my sounding board, idea generator, and proofreader :-). I couldn't possibly put out these installments without her help!!! Thanks, Denise!!!
EPISODE 1
SCENE 1
EXT. THE HORTON HOUSE - NIGHT
JACK is sitting in a rented car, parked from across the house. He has just driven from the airport and has been rehearsing what he will say to JENNIFER once they come face to face again. They have not seen each other in almost a month because Jack had been away, and when he had come home to their house in Capetown, he had discovered that JENNIFER had disappeared with ABBY.
He gets out of the car and walks slowly towards the house, then rings the doorbell.
JENNIFER (VO): I got it, Grandma...
The door swings open and JACK and JENNIFER come face to face, neither able to say anything for a few moments. He is relieved to see she is all right, but then remembers how he had felt when he realized she and ABBY had left, and he becomes angry again.
JENNIFER: (flustered--she is surprised to see him) Jack... What... what are you doing here?
JACK: Don't you think I should be the one posing that question, Jennifer? You're the one who-
JENNIFER: Would you please keep your voice down?
She slips outside and shuts the door behind her.
JENNIFER: Abby is sleeping already, and I don't want you to wake her and get her all upset!
JACK: You don't want... (laughs incredulously) You disappear with my daughter one night without telling me and you're telling me to keep my voice down? How the hell am I not supposed to be upset-
JENNIFER: Jack, please! Stop it--she's going to hear you! Do you want her to wake up crying?
JACK: No... Of course I don't want to make her cry...
JENNIFER: (quietly) Thank you. (beat) How did you know I was here?
JACK: How do you think? I was frantic in Africa--no one there knew where you were, not even your father! I called everybody we knew and thank God I got a hold of your grandmother. If it hadn't been for her, your father and I would have rounded up the entire Capetown police force looking for you two.
JENNIFER takes a shaky breath and tears begin to form in her eyes.
JENNIFER: I'm sorry, Jack, I shouldn't have--I shouldn't have just left like that and worried you and Dad... I was going to call you, but I just needed some time-
JACK: (doesn't want to hear her explanation right now) Is Abigail all right?
JENNIFER: Yes... Yes, of course, she's all right, Jack. I would never let anything happen to her--you know that.
JACK: I want to see her. (realizes that may have sounded harsh, tries to soften his tone) First thing tomorrow morning-
JENNIFER: (cutting him off with a nod) Fine. You'll see her. But Jack, there is a reason I left. Maybe I shouldn't have run off the way I did-
JACK: Maybe?
JENNIFER: Look, I know I shouldn't have let you worry like that, all right? But listen to me--we have problems, Jack. Big problems. We tried it your way, we ran away to Africa to leave the past behind, but you know what? It's still there. The past is still there, and things are going to have to change. (beat) For Abby's sake.
JACK feels guilty, seeing that he has hurt her deeply--again.
JENNIFER: We can't keep doing this, Jack. This same old dance we always do, it can't keep happening. It is hurting our daughter, don't you see that? And I won't let anyone or anything hurt her...
JACK tries to say something, but can't.
JENNIFER: You'll see her tomorrow. But things... they are going to have to be different from here on out.
JENNIFER goes back inside and JACK watches her, feeling like his whole world has just collapsed.
SCENE 2
INT. JENNIFER'S BEDROOM - LATER
JENNIFER hears a faint knock at the door. After a few moments, the knock comes again, more urgent this time.
ALICE (VO): Jennifer Rose?
JENNIFER smiles and goes to open the door.
JENNIFER: Hey, Grandma... Come on in...
ALICE hesitates at first, but JENNIFER takes her hand and gently leads her in.
ALICE: I didn't wake you, did I?
JENNIFER: No, of course not, Grandma! (beat) I've got a lot on my mind. I doubt I'll be getting to sleep tonight anytime soon...
ALICE: (knowing JENNIFER is talking about her encounter with JACK) Oh darling... I'm sorry to have interfered with you and Jack by telling him you were here, but he was so out of his mind with worry, I just couldn't let him go on like that-
JENNIFER: No, no, you did the right thing, you did... I'm glad you told him...
ALICE: But?
JENNIFER: (smiling because her grandmother knows her so well) But him being here... It complicates things.
ALICE: Darling, I thought you were angry at him for being away in Africa? And now he's here--isn't that what you wanted?
JENNIFER doesn't know how to answer her.
SCENE 3
IN PROGRESS
ALICE has just asked JENNIFER why she isn't happy that Jack has come back when this is what she had wanted.
ALICE: Isn't this what you wanted all along, darling? For him to come home?
JENNIFER: (softly) Oh Grandma, I wish it could be that simple with Jack... (beat) But with him, nothing ever is.
ALICE: You didn't answer me, Jennifer Rose. He's finally back--so why are you still so angry?
JENNIFER: I'm not angry, Grandma, I'm... sad. I'm frustrated, I'm disappointed...
She catches a glimpse of her wedding ring. She is still wearing it, even though they had not gotten around to getting married again after JACK came back. She remembers when he asked her and ABBY to move to Africa with him.
FLASHBACK - FIVE YEARS EARLIER
INT. JACK AND JENNIFER'S HOUSE - DAY
JACK and JENNIFER have finally worked through their problems and gotten back together, nearly a year after JACK returned. JACK has just made a bold suggestion about their future that takes JENNIFER by surprise.
JENNIFER: Jack, I don't know... I don't know if we're ready to do this, I mean, we just... we just got back together... Don't you think that we might be rushing into this?
JACK: (smiling to reassure her) Well it's not like we've always done things the traditional way, Miss Horton.
JENNIFER: (grinning back at him) That's Mrs. Deveraux to you. I never did change my name back.
JACK: I stand corrected. (beat) Jennifer, this is our chance to start over again. It's our chance to wipe the slate clean and leave all the pain and mistakes behind us... Don't you want that too?
JENNIFER: Of course I do, Jack, but-
JACK: (cutting her off before she can protest any further) We'll be working together just like the old days. And we'll take this slowly, as slowly as we need to. And when we feel it's the right time... (says the next thing carefully, because he's not sure how she'll react) we'll get married again... You--you know, I mean-
JENNIFER laughs at his nervousness. She smiles at him to let him know he didn't say anything wrong.
JENNIFER: I like that idea.
JACK: (relieved) And we'll be a family. We'll be a family again.
JENNIFER: (softly) That's all I've ever wanted.
JACK moves in closer and brushes the hair out of her eyes, then cups her face in his hands.
JACK: God knows I've made my share of mistakes. I know... I know how lucky I am that you saw past all of them, Jennifer. Any other woman would have left a long time ago, but you stuck around. You... you stuck by me-
JENNIFER: I'm stubborn, remember? Always have been, always will be.
JACK: (smiling) Thank goodness that never changed.
JENNIFER: Famous last words.
JACK: (leans in and whispers) I am going make this up to you. I promise, Miss Hort--Jennifer... I promise I will never leave you and Abigail again. I will never hurt you two like that ever again.
BACK TO PRESENT DAY
JENNIFER: I really tried to make this work, Grandma. I did. When Jack came back, I was angry at first, but I knew I loved him and wanted him back in my life. And I wanted Abby to have her father back again. So against my better judgment, I just ran away with him. I really thought it was going to work, that we were going to put our marriage back together.
ALICE: But, darling, I thought you had finally worked things out between you two? Abby was healthy, Jack had dealt with his guilt, and you two were going to be together again, as a family...
JENNIFER: I thought so too...
JENNIFER turns to look at ALICE and catches a glimpse of the ivory brush that Jack had bought her in Kenya. She swallows hard to keep from crying.
JENNIFER: I thought it was really going to be forever this time, Grandma. The way it was supposed to be for us. And it was at first. Those first few years in Africa, it was wonderful. We were happy, Abby was happy... But then things started to change again...
ALICE: In what way?
JENNIFER: (hastens to change the subject because she doesn't want to talk about this anymore) Grandma, the bottom line is, he let me and Abby down. Again and again. How much more of that do I take before I say enough is enough?
ALICE: Answer me one question, Jennifer Rose. Do you still love him?
JENNIFER: (softly) Yes. I'll always love him. That's never going to change, but-
ALICE: No buts, darling. If you love him, then you hang onto that and you two will find a way to make things work. You always have.
JENNIFER: Grandma, love isn't enough. (surprised to hear herself saying these words) Yes, I love him--and I will love him till the day I die, but that is not the issue here.
ALICE: You loved him enough to work things out before--what's different now?
JENNIFER: You know what, Grandma? If it were just me, I would go back to him right now. I would run to him and I would tell him none of this matters and I'd let him back into my life just like I always do. But Grandma, it isn't just me anymore. I have Abby to think about, and I won't let her be hurt because her parents just can't seem to get it right.
ALICE: Oh darling, you don't mean that-
JENNIFER: Yes, I do... I don't want to have to be the one to tell her that her daddy cancelled their safari trip because he's away in God knows where and I have no idea when he'll be back. I won't be the one to look at her face when Jack decides to leave again without telling us where he'll be, and I won't be the one to hold her when she cries herself to sleep because she misses him so much. I can't do that to her anymore.
ALICE: Jennifer Rose, at least talk to Jack. Tell him all this-
JENNIFER: Grandma, it's too late. If he doesn't know this by now--if he hasn't learned yet to put us first in his life, then I can't play this game anymore. It's only going to hurt Abby...
ALICE takes JENNIFER in her arms and lets her cry.
JENNIFER: It hurts right now, but I know it's for the best... I can't let Jack Deveraux back in my life again. I won't...
EPISODE 2
SCENE 1
INT. VERN'S KITCHEN - DAY (THE DAY AFTER EPISODE 1)
JACK is sitting at the table with his head in his hands. VERN comes up behind him.
VERN: You look like hell, Jack.
JACK: (annoyed) Why thank you for your brutal frankness, Vern.
VERN hands Jack a mug with, don't believe everything you read, written on the side of it. VERN laughs.
VERN: It was a gag gift.
JACK gives him a sarcastic laugh and takes a sip of the coffee. He tries not to grimace when he tastes how watered down it is. He sets the mug back down and begins to rub at his temples.
JACK: Well I suppose it's only fitting that I look the way I feel right now.
VERN: Didn't get much sleep last night, did you?
JACK shakes his head.
VERN: Yeah I guess you'd still be jet-lagged after traveling all day yesterday.
JACK: (not very convincingly) Yes. Jet-lagged...
VERN: Hey, why don't you go back to bed, huh? Jenny-girl will understand if you go there a little later, I'm sure-
JACK: No! (instantly feels guilty for having snapped at VERN) Look, I haven't seen my daughter in four weeks and I want to be there as soon as she wakes up. (beat) I don't care if I do feel like a semi just ran over me.
VERN holds up his hands in surrender.
VERN: All right, boss, sheesh! Just trying to be the good host and all.
JACK: (muttering) I'm sorry... I don't suppose I'm being the world's easiest guest right now, am I? (he sees VERN smiling and looking like he's about to say something) Don't answer that.
VERN: Look Jack, we're friends. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here.
JACK immediately gets defensive and arches an eyebrow at VERN.
JACK: What makes you think I need someone to talk to?
VERN: Even though you're a pain in the rear on a normal basis, (JACK takes offense at this statement) you've been even more of one since you got back. It doesn't take an investigative journalist to figure out something is wrong with you and Jenny-girl, so let's just say I took a wild guess. (beat) All I'm saying is I'm here if you need to get something off your chest.
JACK looks up at VERN and considers his offer.
SCENE 2
INT. HORTON HOUSE - SAME
JENNIFER is sitting at the kitchen table alone, having pancakes. ABBY has woken up and comes in through the door.
ABBY: Mommy?
JENNIFER: (a little startled, but happy to see her daughter) Well hey there, Sleepyhead... Grandma went with Uncle Lucas to shop for a costume for Will, so would you care to join your mom in a breakfast for two?
ABBY: (enthusiastically) Sure!
JENNIFER scoops her up in her arms. She is still a little shaken from her confrontation with JACK last night and is grateful ABBY doesn't seem to have heard any of their heated argument.
JENNIFER: Look, I made your favorite--chocolate chip pancakes.
ABBY: Ooh, with peanut butter?
JENNIFER wrinkles her nose and laughs.
JENNIFER: Peanut butter? (gets a jar from the cupboard) Sure, here you go...
ABBY takes the jar from JENNIFER and smiles, revealing a missing front tooth. JENNIFER suddenly remembers that she has forgotten to play Tooth Fairy and neglected to leave money under ABBY'S pillow.
ABBY: (dejectedly) Still nothing from the Tooth Fairy...
JENNIFER feels very guilty now.
ABBY: Maybe she can't find us--what if she thinks we're still in Africa with Daddy, and she doesn't know we came here? I think we should take out an ad in the newspaper to let her know we've moved.
JENNIFER: (amused at her daughter's thought process) Well that's very resourceful of you, Abby. Sweetie, I made sure to leave a change of address for her, though. And for the Easter Bunny and Santa too. They'll find us, I promise.
ABBY: Did you leave one for Daddy, too? He has to know where to come for my birthday, right?
JENNIFER is taken aback by ABBY'S question.
SCENE 3
CUT TO: JACK and VERN
VERN has just told JACK that he's there for him if JACK needs to talk. JACK briefly considered talking to VERN about his problems, but now decides not to.
JACK: I appreciate the offer, Vern, but there's nothing much to say. Jennifer left me and I want to make sure I don't lose my daughter. End of story.
VERN: (under his breath) Yeah right...
JACK: (having heard him) What was that?
VERN: (trying to be dismissive) Oh nothing, nothing... It's just that it looked like you guys were finally going to make it this time.
JACK: Well what can I say, Vern, as usual I managed to mess it up.
JACK grows uncomfortable with this conversation, but VERN does not let up.
VERN: I don't believe that for a second. When you came back, you said things would be different-
JACK: Obviously I was wrong, all right? (beat) Can we drop this, please?
This has hit really close to home now, and JACK does not want to talk about this anymore.
SCENE 4
CUT TO: JENNIFER and ABBY
ABBY has just asked JENNIFER if she told JACK where they would be. JENNIFER feels guilty and tries to think of a good answer. She does not want ABBY to think JACK is irresponsible, but is scared that ABBY will come to that conclusion on her own if JACK keeps coming in and out of her life the way he has.
JENNIFER: Sweetie, I'm sure Daddy will try his best to be here...
ABBY: Are you mad at Daddy?
JENNIFER is shocked that ABBY would ask her this. She laughs nervously to try and stall until she can think of what to say.
ABBY: Is that why we left Africa, Mommy? Are you mad at him?
JENNIFER: (smiling weakly, as she begins to play with ABBY'S hair) What would make you ask such a silly question, baby?
ABBY: (seems to pick up on her mother's attempt to downplay things) You were sad in Africa. Whenever Daddy would be gone, you would cry...
JENNIFER looks at ABBY in shock, horrified to learn that her daughter had seen her crying over JACK.
JENNIFER: Abby, come here... (she reaches over to take ABBY and place her on her lap) You know, sometimes even grownups get a little sad. Sometimes they cry too, but it's really nothing to worry about.
ABBY: You missed Daddy too, didn't you?
JENNIFER: (looking at ABBY, noticing for the first time just how much she looks like JACK) Yeah, baby, I did.
ABBY: And that's why you were mad at him?
JENNIFER: Abby, I don't want you to worry about whether Mommy or Daddy are mad at each other, okay? The only thing I want you to remember always is that Mommy and Daddy love you very, very much. And we don't want you to be sad ever. Do you understand?
ABBY nods. JENNIFER smiles, in part to reassure ABBY, but also in part to cover up her own sadness. She kisses ABBY'S forehead and thinks of how she and JACK will possibly move on from here.
SCENE 5
CUT TO: JACK and VERN
JACK is growing uneasy with VERN'S questions about him and JENNIFER. He wants to change the subject NOW.
VERN: I'm just curious--things seemed to be going so well for you guys the last few years. You and Jenny-girl were even working together again, just like the old days.
JACK realizes he has to pounce on this chance to switch topics.
JACK: Yes, those series of freelance articles we did on Dr. Horton's program were very well received, indeed...
VERN: I know, Jack, we ran them in The Spectator and they were a huge success.
JACK: (relieved that VERN finally got the hint) Syndicated in thirty-three newspapers around the globe... (suddenly feels sad when he remembers who helped him get this success, quickly tries to cover up his sadness) You know, Time Life wants us to do a book based on these articles. They're offering quite a sizable advance, as a matter of fact.
VERN: That's fantastic!
JACK: Yes...
VERN: Hey, maybe it'll be enough to buy back The Spectator after all these years, huh buddy?
JACK isn't listening to him; he is still thinking of JENNIFER.
VERN: Jack? Hello? Earth to Jack Deveraux...
JACK: Hmm? (suddenly realizing VERN is talking to him) Oh, yes... How is the old rag these days, anyway?
VERN: Jack, it hasn't been the same since you and Jenny-girl were on board. Kate hasn't exactly showered us with her attention over the last few years. The Chronicle has long caught up to us and then some.
JACK: (still bitter over KATE KIRIAKIS'S betrayal seven years ago) Yes, well I didn't think Kate would waste her time on it once she got Titan. Once she got her hands on the big prize, why would she need to bother with a small-time paper?
VERN: (taking offense) Small-time paper? Jack when you were running the show we were a well-respected, award-winning newspaper-
JACK: -that struggled to stay afloat the entire time I owned it-
VERN: -that attracted talented journalists and top-notch advertisers-
JACK: (sarcastically) Those that weren't afraid to be associated with the Deveraux name, that is.
VERN: Oh come, on, give yourself some credit. It was a damn good paper, and you know it.
JACK: (smiling) Yes... I guess it was... (beat) Well as much as I've enjoyed heading down memory lane with you, Vern, a certain fair damsel by the name of Abigail awaits and I do not want to waste a single minute more--no offense, of course.
VERN: (amused) None taken. (beat) You really love that little girl, don't you?
JACK: (softly) She's my whole life. The only truly good thing I've ever been able to do.
VERN: Aww, come on, Jack, you've done a lot of good-
JACK: (getting up to leave) Thank you for your hospitality, Vern. I shall be out of your hair tonight. It seems today is the last day of the wildly exciting accountants' convention, so the Salem Inn should have rooms available for tonight.
JACK is at the door, but stops when he hears VERN'S voice.
VERN: You're welcome to stay here, Jack--really...
JACK: Nonsense, Vern. I won't impose on you any further-
JACK turns to leave again, and just as he gets ready to turn the knob, hears VERN say his name once more.
VERN: Jack?
JACK: (frustrated that he can't seem to leave) What, Vern? I really do have to go...
VERN: (worried about JACK) I just... I want to make sure you're all right. (beat) You're all right--right?
JACK: (sighs in exasperation) Aside from feeling the normal effects of traveling across several time zones in one day and trying to survive this endless conversation with you, yes. I am fine. May I go now?
VERN: Yeah, yeah, go see your daughter. I'll talk to you later.
JACK: (rolling his eyes) Yes. I'll be sure to check in with you later, Warden. (he pauses at the door, then turns to look at VERN again) Uh, Vern?
VERN: Yeah?
JACK: Thank you.
VERN smiles, and JACK expects him to make a wisecrack, but he doesn't.
VERN: You're welcome.
EPISODE 3
SCENE 1
INT. HORTON KITCHEN - DAY (SAME DAY AS EPISODE 2)
JENNIFER has been reassuring ABBY that whatever problems she and JACK are having, they will never change the fact that they will love ABBY forever. ABBY is still sitting on JENNIFER'S lap, and JENNIFER gently pats her on the back.
JENNIFER: Baby, your pancakes are getting cold.
ABBY scoots back to her own seat.
JENNIFER: Do you feel better now?
ABBY: Uh huh... What about you, Mommy, do you feel better now too?
JENNIFER is amused, but touched by ABBY'S concern. She reaches over to cup ABBY'S chin.
JENNIFER: (smiles) Now that you're feeling better, I couldn't be happier.
The doorbell rings, interrupting them.
ABBY: (starting to get up) I'll get it-
JENNIFER: Nice try, young lady, but you stay put and finish your breakfast. I'll get it.
ABBY: (sighs dramatically, then breaks out in a mischievous grin) Okay, Mommy.
JENNIFER smiles at the fact that ABBY seems to have inherited both her parents' deviousness.
She goes to open the door. JACK stands there and an awkward moment passes between them as both remember their fight last night.
JACK: (tries to be cheerful) Good morning.
JENNIFER: (softly) Hi, Jack...
JACK clears his throat and sticks his hands in his pockets. JENNIFER notices he is wearing the dark blue suit that is her favorite, and she can't help but smile.
JACK: Uh... Jennifer?
JENNIFER gets embarrassed and tries to regain her composure.
JENNIFER: Yeah?
JACK: I know we've had many a conversation at doorways, and in fact, we're rather good at them, but... I was hoping you'd let me in this time...
JENNIFER: (suddenly realizing they hadn't moved from their spot, laughing nervously) Oh, right, of course... I'm sorry...
They come in, and both are nervous, not wanting to have another blowup like the one last night, but both also still angry at the other over the events of the last few weeks.
JACK: Abigail's not still asleep, is she?
ABBY is finished eating her breakfast and is coming into the living room to see who was at the door.
ABBY: (seeing JACK) Daddy!!!
JACK'S face lights up when he sees her. He bends down and holds out his arms, ready for an embrace. ABBY runs over to him and nearly topples him over with her momentum.
ABBY: You're here!!
They regain their balance and JACK keeps holding onto her tightly, as if he's afraid she'll vanish if he lets go. His eyes are closed and he is content to savor the moment.
JACK: (whispering) Abigail... I've missed you so much...
ABBY: (pulling away slightly so she can look at his face) I've missed you too, Daddy. I knew you'd find me! I knew you'd be here! You wouldn't miss my birthday!
JACK: No, there's no place else I'd rather be. I wouldn't miss your birthday for anything in the world, Abigail.
ABBY: Really?
JACK: (smiles and taps her on the nose) Really. Cross my heart.
ABBY throws her arms around JACK again.
ABBY: Good. Because I'm not going to let you go ever again, Daddy!
JACK feels guilty for having been gone too often in the last few months and wishes he hadn't had to be away so much. He does not want to disappoint ABBY again.
JENNIFER is watching them, letting them have their moment. She is torn because she can see how much JACK loves ABBY and she wants ABBY to have a good relationship with him, but she is also afraid that JACK will leave again sooner or later and ABBY will keep getting hurt and may grow to resent JACK.
She remembers the last few months with JACK being gone all the time and she gets angry once again, but doesn't say anything.
JACK: So don't tell me you've already got the gala of the year all planned out. There's still some things left for me to do, right?
ABBY: Sure, Daddy-
JENNIFER: Uh, sweetie... Don't forget, we promised Hope we'd go see Shawn-D's basketball game, remember? She and Bo will be picking us up in an hour, so maybe you should get dressed, huh?
ABBY nods and starts to go up the stairs.
JACK: (to JENNIFER, so ABBY does not hear) You didn't tell me I'd only have an hour with her.
JENNIFER: (to JACK) You didn't ask. (noticing that ABBY has stopped and is watching them) Go on, baby.
ABBY: You won't go anywhere, will you Daddy?
JACK: No, of course not, Abigail. I'll be right here until you come down. Promise.
ABBY: (smiling) Great, I'll be right back. Don't go anywhere!
JACK watches her go up the stairs, then turns back to JENNIFER.
JACK: Thank you. For letting me see her. It means the world to me, Jennifer...
JENNIFER: She loves you, Jack... (feeling guilty for not telling him about the basketball game) And, look, why don't you come with us to the game? That way you'll get to spend some time with her?
JACK: (grateful) I'd like that. (beat) I've really missed her.
JENNIFER: She's really missed you too. She's been waiting to see you for almost a month now.
JACK: So have I--I've been dying to see her-
JENNIFER: (starting to get angry again, remembering how he would be gone all the time, cuts him off) But you were gone all this time, yes, I remember. (looks upstairs and sighs, then gestures towards the kitchen) I don't want her to hear us.
JACK follows JENNIFER into the kitchen. He knows the walls between them are back up and they are back to where they were last night.
JACK: I'm not here to argue with you, Jennifer. I'm here to see our daughter.
JENNIFER: Oh, well I'm glad you remember her, Jack...
JACK: (defensive) What is that supposed to mean?
JENNIFER: It means this was the fifth time in six months that you had pulled this disappearing act, Jack. This time it was three weeks, last time it was two weeks, one time it was six weeks-
JACK once again feels guilty for having been away so often.
JACK: (softly) You know you two mean more to me than anything in this world-
JENNIFER: Oh really? Is that why every time we turned around, you were gone?
JACK: It couldn't be helped. (beat) I had important things to do-
The comment feels like a slap in the face to JENNIFER.
JENNIFER: More important than your family?
JACK: (knowing that came out the wrong way) Don't put words in my mouth, Jennifer. That's not what I am saying at all!
JENNIFER: (letting loose all the frustration of the last few months) And don't make me look like a fool, Jack Deveraux. You promised! You promised it would be different this time around, that you would never leave us again, and-
JACK: And I kept that promise. (quietly) I did. (beat) We were in Africa together, as a family, and I swear to you I did everything in my power to keep in that way!
JENNIFER: Yeah, in the beginning, maybe... But you then started pulling away from me--even before these disappearing acts, Jack. It was like ten years ago all over again, and when I tried to talk to you, you would just push me away. (she is crying now) What was I supposed to think?
JACK: (softly) I never wanted to hurt you and Abigail... (this is killing him to see her cry) I promised you I'd love you both forever, and I kept that promise...
JENNIFER: You know what Jack? Someone wise once told me that love just isn't enough sometimes.
JACK is hurt and surprised that she would use his words against him like this. JENNIFER instantly feels guilty for doing so.
JACK: Look, I know you're angry that I had to go away sometimes, but you have to trust me when I tell you I had a good reason-
JENNIFER: How am I supposed to do that, Jack? You want me to trust that you have a good reason, but you can't even trust me to tell me what it is...
JACK: I know it's asking a lot-
JENNIFER: Yes, Jack, it is. It's asking too much. It took everything in me to get past you leaving us the first time. (beat) Please don't ask me to keep doing it.
JACK sees that she is still deeply hurt over what him leaving seven years ago and he wishes he could undo all the pain he's caused her.
JACK: (quietly) It's always going to come back to that, isn't it?
JENNIFER doesn't say anything. She thought they had worked through this already, and she too is surprised that she brought this up again.
JACK: Are you going to keep me from seeing Abigail?
JENNIFER can not give him an answer.
EPISODE 4
SCENE 1
EXT. A CEMETERY - NIGHT (SAME DAY AS EPISODE 3)
JACK has come to visit STEVE'S grave. He stands in front of the headstone and notices a bouquet of yellow roses. The sight of them brings back all the awful memories of seeing his brother die ten years ago this month. He looks on the flowers somberly, sadly, then kneels down.
JACK: Hey Johnson... Bet you've been wondering what took me so long to come visit you here, huh?
He laughs, feeling strange talking to a headstone, but he knows he needs to do this. He needs his big brother right now, and he hopes that somehow STEVE can hear him.
JACK: It's been a while since I was here. I'm sorry for not having come here more often, but I've been out of the country--you understand. (laughs) You know me, always off trekking somewhere on some adventure or another... Of course more often than not, I needed you to save my hide, but I've had to learn to make due since... (quietly) since you... died...
He gets up, not sure if he can do this after all since he feels very silly. But he can not bring himself to leave.
JACK: (resorting to humor as always) This is a bit awkward, isn't it? Well, it's not like you were a great conversationalist when you were alive, either, so I suppose I shouldn't feel so odd monopolizing the conversation... (he sighs, then slips his hands inside the pockets of his trench coat) The thing is, Steve, I really could use your help right now. Because I've really made a mess of things again, and... and I really don't know what to do...
He is uncomfortable and begins to pace, then finally stops and sits down again in front of the headstone.
JACK: I've lost Jennifer, Steve. I... I really think I've lost her this time...
He suddenly realizes STEVE never had the chance to see so many milestones in his life, including his marriage to JENNIFER and ABBY'S birth.
JACK: I guess I should fill you in on a few things first, huh? (smiles as he thinks of JENNIFER and ABBY) Well Johnson, this is going to come as a shock to you, but Miss Horton and I finally did make it to the altar. Not without several hurdles along the way, of course--and rather large ones at that--but considering the bride and groom, I suppose you couldn't really expect anything less, can you? (to himself) And those weren't the last of our hurdles...
He begins to think back on the day he came back to Salem after having left JENNIFER and ABBY.
FLASHBACK - SIX YEARS EARLIER
EXT. THE CEMETERY - DAY
JACK has come back to Salem after hearing about TOM HORTON'S death. He has been deeply affected by TOM'S death, realizing that leaving JENNIFER and ABBY, however noble or honorable his intention, was a mistake and he wants to be back in their lives.
He attends the funeral to pay his respects to TOM. This is the first time he and JENNIFER have come face to face since he left a few months ago.
The funeral is over and JACK tries to talk to JENNIFER, but she runs away from him, and he chases after her.
JACK: Jennifer, please... I just need you to hear me out...
JENNIFER: (finally stops running, turns around to look at him) What are you doing here, Jack? How can you pick this day of all days to do this?
JACK: Dr. Horton treated me like a grandson, Jennifer. I wanted to pay my respects too.
JENNIFER softens when she hears this, but is still too angry and hurt to let him in, even though she really needs consolation right now.
JACK: I'm sorry, I... I know this day is hard enough for you and I never intended to upset you by being here-
JENNIFER: You never intend to hurt anyone, do you, Jack?
JACK is hurt by the comment, but he knows she has every right to be bitter towards him after what he did.
JACK: (quietly) How is Abigail?
JENNIFER doesn't answer right away, and JACK isn't sure if he has upset her again by mentioning their daughter.
JENNIFER: She's good...
JACK: (afraid to get his hopes up, but has to know for sure) So she's... are you saying...
JENNIFER: (nodding) The bone marrow transplant worked. She's completely free of the Aplastic Anemia...
JACK sighs in relief, feeling as if a heavy burden has finally been lifted off his shoulders.
JACK: (murmuring to himself) Thank God... She's going to be all right...
JENNIFER wants so badly to reach out to him at this moment. She has been so lonely in the last few months and even though she had been overjoyed at ABBY'S recovery, a part of her has been sad that she did not have JACK to share that happiness with. But she is too hurt over everything that has happened.
JACK: (seeing how much he's hurting her and wanting her to have this day to grieve): Thank you... for letting me know... I've thought about her everyday since I've been gone. (beat) Look, I don't want to make this day any harder for you than it already is, so-
JENNIFER: Jack...
JACK stops and looks at her. JENNIFER knows one moment won't undo everything that's happened, but she really needs for him to hold her right now. She walks up to him and gently lays her head on his chest. JACK is surprised, but doesn't say anything. Slowly he brings his arms up and he holds her as she cries.
JACK: It's going to be all right... You'll be all right... (whispers to himself, but he doesn't know that JENNIFER hears) I'm never leaving you again... Never...
BACK TO PRESENT DAY
JACK: (clearing his throat) But I guess I just don't do well with happy endings, do I? I've managed to make a mess out of this too... (beat) Jennifer's really angry at me right now, Steve. She's so angry with me, and I guess deep down, I don't really blame her. She's right, I was pushing her away again. I told her I'd never do that again, and yet I did it. And I suppose in the end, it doesn't really matter what my reasons were. The fact is, I hurt her again.
He feels guilty, knowing that he has hurt so many people in his life, even though he never intends to.
JACK: (quietly) I seem to have this bad habit of hurting the ones I love the most... (beat) And I do love her. I love her and Abigail more than anything in this world, and even though I hate hurting them, I always end up doing it somehow. Even when I don't even intend to. Even when it's all out of my hands... like it is... right now... I know what you'd say, Johnson, you'd say, 'Why the hell don't you just tell her everything? Tell her why you were pulling away from her, why you had to go away all those times?' But I... can't. Not yet. Not until I know for sure if...
He absently reaches for a rose from the bouquet, and turns it over and over in his hands.
JACK: She won't come back to me now, and maybe that's for the best anyway. But Abigail... No matter what Jennifer may think, I love my daughter and I don't want to be apart from her. Not ever. And I know you'd tell me that it doesn't make sense for me to want to push Jennifer away right now and still want to hold on to Abigail at the same time, but it's because she's so little and she wouldn't understand any of this... Jennifer... Jennifer would understand. Once she knows everything, she'd understand... But Abigail...
He takes out a picture of ABBY from his pocket and lays it on top of the bouquet. He looks at the picture with extreme love and pride.
JACK: I wish you could have seen her, Steve. I really wish you could have been a part of her life. (smiles, imagining what it would have been like for STEVE to be around ABBY) She would have loved you, you know--and you would have loved her. She's the most perfect child in the world, after all--just like Stephanie, of course. But you understand, don't you? You understand why I had to do what I did, why I have to do what I have to do? God, I wish you could tell me what to do right now... I really wish you could tell me...
SCENE 2
INT. BILL'S OFFICE - NIGHT
JACK comes up to the door after a few minutes of being unable to decide whether or not to knock, he finally does. BILL answers the door.
BILL: Jack, I didn't think you were going to come.
JACK: (laughing to cover up his nervousness) Well to tell you the truth, Dr. Horton, I--I wasn't going to...
BILL: I'm glad you changed your mind then. (gestures towards the chair) Why don't you have a seat?
JACK feels very trapped right now. He has been dreading this meeting for a while now, but after seeing ABBY, he knows he has to do it.
JACK: Uh, thank you...
BILL: (giving him a knowing smile) You're nervous.
JACK: Nervous? No, no, no, not nervous--not nervous at all... This is all old hat now, isn't it? It's like riding a bicycle--one never forgets-
BILL: Jack...
JACK: (clears throat) Yes, Dr. Horton?
BILL: Son, I know we've never really been particularly close, but we're family. And what's more, I'm your doctor. It may be a little awkward, but I want you to feel comfortable enough to talk to me. To tell me how you're feeling. I know... this can't be easy for you dealing with this.
JACK looks away, then notices his and JENNIFER'S wedding picture on BILL'S desk.
JACK: (quietly) I'm coping.
BILL sees that JACK is looking at his wedding picture and knows he's thinking of JENNIFER.
BILL: She should really know, Jack. (beat) I know this is none of my business and you have to do what you feel is best, but... don't you think she has a right to know? Jack, she's going to find out sooner or later...
JACK: I'd rather it be later.
BILL: And what about Abby?
JACK: (all of the sudden gets scared) Abigail mustn't know about this, Dr. Horton. That is one thing I won't budge on-
BILL: It's all right, Jack, you don't have to worry about me saying anything. As your doctor, I will respect your wishes completely. He set his pen down, then leaned forward, looking more serious. But as your father-in-law-
JACK: Well, technically-
BILL: As a friend, I hope you'll reconsider keeping this from them, Jack.
JACK: I do appreciate your advice, and I thank you, but I haven't changed my mind about this.
BILL: (doesn't want to force JACK into doing anything he's not comfortable with) All right. I won't push you on this. (beat) So... can I assume that you've come here today because you've made a decision?
JACK: Yes, yes, you assume correctly, Dr. Horton. I've uh... made my decision.
BILL: Good, I'm glad to hear that, Jack. And I hope it's what I think it is.
JACK: (laughs nervously) Column A or column B--it wasn't exactly a fun choice either way. But yes, I have made up my mind. I am... going to do it, Dr. Horton. (beat) I will go through the chemotherapy.
SCENE 3
INT. JACK'S HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT
MONTAGE - JANN ARDEN'S "HANGIN' BY A THREAD" IS PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND
JACK walks in his room and throws the keys on the dresser. He sits down on the chair and fishes out his wallet and takes out a picture of him, JENNIFER, and ABBY when ABBY was still a baby.
When I cry, I close my
eyes
And every tear falls down inside
And I pray with all my might
That I will find my heart in someone's arms
When I cry, cry
When I cry, when I am sad
I think of every awful thing I ever did
When I cry, there is no love
No there is nothing that can comfort me enough
When I cry, cry, cry
CUT TO: JENNIFER AND ABBY
JENNIFER is tucking ABBY in. ABBY asks her to read her a story.
CUT TO: JACK AT HIS HOTEL ROOM
JACK sinks down onto a chair and looks at the picture of him, JENNIFER, and ABBY.
The salt inside my
body ruins everyone I come close to
My hands are barely holding up my head
I am so tired of looking at my feet
And all the secrets that I keep
My heart is barely hangin' by a thread, hangin' by a thread
CUT TO: JENNIFER AND ABBY
JENNIFER has finished reading the story, and watches as ABBY falls asleep.
Oh look at me, at all
I've done
I've lost so many things that I so dearly love
I lost my soul, I lost my pride
Oh I lost any hope of having a sweet life
So I cry, cry, cry
CUT TO: JACK AT HIS HOTEL ROOM
JACK is still looking at the picture. Tears begin to form at the corners of his eyes.
Oh the salt inside my
body ruins everyone I come close to
My hands are barely holding up my head
Oh I'm so tired of looking at my feet
And all the secrets that I keep
My heart is barely hangin' by a thread, hangin' by a thread
I miss you all
I wish I was
With you now
I wish I was
As the song plays, fade to black.
EPISODE 5
SCENE 1
EXT. SALEM PLACE - DAY (TWO DAYS AFTER EPISODE 4)
JACK is standing outside of Ballistix, calling someone on his cell phone and looking very impatient as he waits for someone to answer.
JACK: (mumbling to himself) Come on Vern... Where are you?
Several people walk past JACK and give him strange looks, and JACK responds with a mind your own business grin.
The phone continues to ring. JACK waits for VERN'S voicemail to pick up, but finally he hears a voice on the other end.
VERN: Spectator, Vern Scofield speaking.
JACK: (overjoyed) Vern! You are there!
VERN: Jack?
JACK: Of course it's me! Who else would be calling you? Listen, I have a job for you...
VERN doesn't say anything. JACK wonders if the battery on his phone went dead. He pulls the phone away from his ear and looks at it, then puts it back on his ear.
JACK: Uh, Vern? Hello? Are you there?
VERN: (grunting) Yeah, I'm here.
JACK: Oh good. For a minute there I thought my phone had gone dead. (laughs) You weren't saying anything.
VERN: Oh well, I'm sorry, it's just that I thought I heard you say that you had a job for me-
JACK: I did say that.
VERN: Goodbye, Jack-
JACK: (panicked) Wait, wait, wait! Don't hang up... Please?
VERN reluctantly stays on the line.
SCENE 2
IN PROGRESS
JACK has just brought up a mysterious "job" for VERN, and VERN is dreading hearing what this could possibly be.
JACK: Vern? You, uh, you didn't hang up, did you?
VERN: (to himself) I should... (to JACK) No, I'm still here. (he sighs)
JACK: Good, good...
VERN: But you've got one minute to convince me not to hang up on you again, Jack. You're not my boss anymore and there is no reason for me to ever get involved with another one of your crazy schemes-
JACK: I swear, this one does not involve any fire trucks, or drivers named Rodney, or-
VERN: I thought his name was Bradley?
JACK: -or any Dalmatians. (beat) Although it does involve a certain four-legged creature-
VERN: (doesn't want to hear any more) That's it, Jack, goodbye--leave me out of this one!
JACK: Wait, won't you even hear me out?
VERN: All right, thirty seconds, Jack-
JACK: Thirty seconds? You gave me a full minute before-
VERN: Jack, I mean it! I've got a budget meeting with Kate in fifteen minutes, and-
JACK: All right, all right, I'll cut to the chase... (clears his throat) Well as you know, Vern, my child's eighth birthday party is coming up...
VERN: Yeah, I think you told me about that. It's this Saturday, isn't it?
JACK: Yes, this Saturday. It's quite a fete, in fact. But you see, her mother has already made most of the arrangements and left me with very little to do, so I decided that with the very little I have, I would make the most out of it.
VERN: (cautiously) So where exactly do I fit into this? And don't even bother to say anything if the next words out of your mouth involve me dressing up as some sort of cartoon-
JACK: No, no, no! Would I ever make you do such a thing?
VERN: Is that a rhetorical question?
JACK: (not amused) Vern, will you please stick with me here? (beat) You see, when Abigail turned three, it was her first birthday in Africa, and all she wanted me and Jennifer to give her was a pony. The entire week leading up to her birthday all we would hear day and night was how she wanted a pony for her birthday. It was all she would talk about. Unfortunately, there is a dearth of ponies in the particular village we were staying at the time, and well, let's just say I've never been able to forget the disappointment on my daughter's face when we couldn't produce the much requested pony...
VERN: (relieved now that he's figured out what Jack is doing) I think I know where you're going with this, Jack.
JACK: I thought you might, Vern... So, you'll help me?
VERN: Um... well if you're asking what I think you're asking, which is to get a pony for Abby's birthday party, then sure...
JACK: (annoyed) Well, what else would I be asking?
VERN: (thoroughly exasperated) Jack, has anyone ever told you that you have the lousiest ways of saying thank you?
JACK: (laughs in embarrassment) I--I meant... Thank you for helping me with this, Vern. It would mean the world to Abigail, and... it would mean a lot to me...
VERN laughs at JACK'S attempts to thank him.
JACK: (wondering why he's laughing) What?
VERN: (amused) Nothing, Jack. You're welcome, really. Abby sure is one lucky little girl to have you for a dad.
JACK: (smiling to himself) You mean that, Vern?
VERN: Forget it, Jack--that's all you're getting out of me!
JACK: (rolls his eyes) So you'll call me when it's all set?
VERN: Will do. I can't wait to see Abby's face when she sees the pony.
JACK: (quietly) Neither can I, Vern...
JACK and VERN hang up. JACK thinks back on his what JENNIFER said to him the other day, and feels guilty for having hurt her and ABBY.
JACK: (to himself) God knows I've let you down enough times, Abigail. But I won't disappoint you this time. I promise.
SCENE 3
INT. HORTON HOUSE - LATER
JENNIFER has asked JACK over so they can talk. As she opens the door, she is surprised at how run-down he looks and can't help but worry. Her first instinct is to reach out to him and ask him if he is all right, but she does not know if she can with things the way they are between them.
JENNIFER: Thanks for coming, Jack.
JACK: Well, thank you for having me... (realizes how that sounded, nervously tries to correct himself) I--I mean, thank you for, um... asking me to come over...
JENNIFER, having noticed the slip, and smiles to herself.
JENNIFER: We've got a lot to talk about-
JACK: Yes, yes, we do... (looks around, then upstairs--he thinks he is here to talk about ABBY'S party, so he doesn't want her to hear) Is the child out of earshot?
JENNIFER: (confused as to why he's acting so strangely) Yeah, she's... she's upstairs playing...
JACK: Good... I wanted to make sure she wouldn't hear us...
JENNIFER: (wonders if this discussion will get heated again) No, I wouldn't want that either...
They go into the living room. JENNIFER sits on the couch, and by force of habit, JACK sits down next to her. They look at each other awkwardly, and JACK laughs, embarrassed. He gets up and moves further down to the other end of the couch.
JENNIFER: I've... had some time to think about what you asked me the other day.
JACK: (confused) What I asked you?
JENNIFER: (confused now too) Yes... About you seeing Abby?
JACK: Wait a minute... that's why you asked me over here?
JENNIFER: Of course it is, Jack. What did you think I asked you to come over here for?
JACK: I thought... I thought we were going to talk about Abigail's birthday party.
JENNIFER: Her birthday party? Look, Jack, you don't have to worry about any of that, I've taken care of everything-
JACK: (smiling) Well... not everything...
JENNIFER: (with suspicion) What do you mean, not everything?
JACK: Well, there's one thing I thought of... the piece de resistance, if you will... It's going to be the show stopper of the event.
JENNIFER: Why do I get the feeling I won't like this very much?
JACK: Oh ye of little faith, Mrs. D- (he catches himself before he can finish the name, and smiles sheepishly)
JENNIFER smiles, having heard the slip too.
JACK: (trying to cover) Not only will you love it, but you will thank me from the bottom of your heart and congratulate me on my thoughtfulness at having had the foresight to plan this!
JENNIFER: Oh I can't wait to hear this...
JACK: (noting her sarcasm, smirks) I'm sure you can't.
JENNIFER: All right, Jack, let's hear it. What's the big surprise?
JACK: You mean you haven't guessed already? (sees he is getting under her skin and is enjoying teasing her) All right, I'll give you a hint. What did the child bother us incessantly about, day and night, for almost a week on her third birthday?
JENNIFER'S eyes widen as she realizes what he is talking about.
JENNIFER: Oh no, Jack... No, no, no... You are not going to bring a pony here, aren't you?
JACK pretends to look hurt.
JACK: Wait, are you saying you don't want one for the party? After all the trouble I've gone through to get one?
JENNIFER: Do you know how much trouble an animal like that can be? Grandma would freak-
JACK: What if I promised to clean up after it? (thinks about it further) Well, Vern will clean up after it-
JENNIFER: No, Jack, absolutely not-
JACK: So you're telling me you don't want to see the look on our daughter's face when we've made her fondest wish come true?
JENNIFER is annoyed that he's using this tactic on her.
JENNIFER: (voice cracking) Don't you dare try to make me feel guilty about this, Jack Deveraux-
ABBY has come down the stairs and hears JENNIFER mention JACK'S name.
ABBY: Daddy?? Is Daddy here?
JENNIFER stops cold and looks at JACK, and mouths the words, not now, to him. He agrees and nods, much to JENNIFER'S relief. ABBY comes into the living room and sees JACK. She is overjoyed at seeing him and runs up to him. They fall back onto the couch, laughing. JENNIFER notices how this seems to take the wind out of JACK.
JENNIFER: Abby, sweetie, maybe you should take it easy, ok? Daddy's-
JACK: (cutting her off sharply) Daddy is just fine. I'm used to rough-housing with my daughter. (to ABBY) Right, Abigail? (he begins to tickle ABBY, and she giggles and squirms in his arms) Right? Is that a yes? I believe that's a yes...
JENNIFER watches them and begins to feel guilty about what she's about to tell JACK.
JENNIFER: (she hates having to break this up, but needs to talk to JACK) Baby? Daddy and I need to have a grown-up talk right now... Can you-
ABBY: (gives her mother a knowing smile) You don't have to explain, Mommy. (turns to JACK and gives him a wink) I know you have to talk about my party...
JACK and JENNIFER exchange amused glances.
JACK: Our child is just too exceptional for us to pull the wool over her eyes.
ABBY: I'll be upstairs. (starts to go up the stairs) And I promise I won't listen!
JACK: What an insightful little girl we have...
JENNIFER: (smiling) She is pretty amazing, isn't she?
JACK: (nervous to bring up the subject) So, you, uh... you said you wanted to talk to me about something...
JENNIFER: (not really sure anymore if she's about to do the right thing) Jack, I've really agonized over this, and I want you to know I did not make this decision lightly... (she looks at his face intently to watch for his reaction) I think it's for the best... if I retain full custody of Abby. You'll have visitation, of course-
JACK: (visibly angry) That's not good enough, Jennifer.
JACK gets up from the couch and walks over to the fireplace. He sees ABBY'S baby picture on the mantle and takes it and looks at it.
JENNIFER: Jack-
JACK: No!! (spins around to face her) I am not going to let you keep me away from my daughter, do you understand?
JENNIFER: (angry now too) Our daughter. Our daughter, who you've barely seen in the last six months! So don't you dare start acting holier-than-thou on me, accusing me of trying to keep her away from you when you were the one who was gone all the time!
JACK: I am here now, Jennifer. I am right here and I'm not going anywhere-
JENNIFER: Yes, you're here now, Jack. But for how long? How long before you pick up and leave again, huh?
JACK decides he has to leave now before this argument gets any further because he knows they'll both say hurtful things to each other if they don't stop now.
JENNIFER: Where do you think you're going? (grabs his arm as he reaches for the door) Don't you walk out on me-
JACK: (snatching his arm away from her grasp) I want joint custody, Jennifer. Not paltry visitation rights, but joint custody. You may not respect me or think much of me as a father, but I love that child. I love her more than life... life itself, and... (looks upstairs) I will not settle for anything less than joint custody.
JACK storms out of the house, and JENNIFER watches him leave. After she is sure that he is far enough from the house, she slumps against the door and cries.
Chapters 1 - 5 *** Chapters 6 - 10 *** Chapters 11 - 15 *** Chapters 16 - 20 *** Chapters 21 - 25 Chapters 26 - 30 *** Chapters 31 - 35 *** Chapters 36 - 40 *** Chapters 41 - 45 *** Chapters 46 - 47