When they reached the pearly gates, St.  Peter took them to their
mansion which was decked out with a beautiful kitchen, master bath suite
and Jacuzzi.

As they "oohed and aahed," the old man asked Peter how much all this was
going to cost.

"It's free," Peter replied, "this is Heaven."

Next they went out back to see the championship golf course that the
home backed up to.

They would have golfing privileges everyday and each week the course
changed to a new one representing the great golf courses on Earth.

The old man asked, "What are the green fees?"

Peter's reply, "This is heaven, you play for free."

Next they went to the club house and saw the lavish buffet lunch with
the cuisine's of the world laid out.

"How much to eat?" asked the old man.

"Don't you understand yet?  This is heaven, it is free!" Peter replied.

"Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods?" the old man
asked timidly.

"That's the best part...you can eat as much as you like of whatever you
like and you never get fat and you never get sick.  This is Heaven."

The old man looked at his wife and said, "You and your darned bran
muffins!  I could have been here ten years ago!"