Chapter 2
Living with a Stent

Chapter 3
Living with Palliative Care

1)
Introduction
Background
Endoscopy
2)
Initial Diagnosis
3)
Telling the family
4)
First Appointment
Taking the tests
5)
Second appointment after tests
6)
Treatment -Chemotherapy and Radiation
7)
Remission
8)
Coping at Night
Coping with Fear
9)
Relationship with Doctors
Keeping Track of Medications
10)
Deciding on a Stent
Conclusion

Last Revised, 05-Nov-2002
Copyright © 2002

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Telling the family

        We decided to keep our sons and the rest of the family up to date on the diagnosis and my prognosis as it unfolded. Be aware, friends and even some relatives will immediately launch into the latest horror story of a friend of a friend who had the “same thing” you have and how they went through absolute hell with it. Depending
on my mood and who the other person was, I sometimes reacted with amusement. At other times I gently reminded them that I would sooner not hear any cancer horror stories at this time, and some had to be told emphatically what they could do with their stories! In most cases these horror stories are told by people not with malice but with lack of
thought or common sense. Once I reminded a person that I did not want to hear the stories and they persisted, I made it clear that I would not put up with it.

        Notwithstanding the above, most people react with sympathy to your news and do their best to help.

        At first I found it difficult to accept help from others (being a big tough man!) but as time went by, I had to accept more help. I found that accepting help not only made things easier for both  my wife and myself, but also made the friend feel that he was of real help. One thing is for certain, many people are upset about your news and will forget what you said or told them on the phone or get it all wrong. I even had one call
expressing sympathy for my heart attack!

        It is important to follow up phone calls with a letter or if possible with e-mail, otherwise rumors run rife causing more pain for all! Although I sometimes found it hard to tell my sons and close friends about the cancer, I found that in the long run it
was best for all.
 
 

Contact
livingwithec@yahoo.com

Note: This email address is only occasionally checked, and due to volume, I am unable to respond to all messages. Nevertheless, feel free to send your thoughts, experiences, or comments.