Nothing is happening. Not a damn thing. I recently read a good quote that would be appropriate to mention right now, but I don't quite remember it or who said it. Nevermind, here it is:

"The amount of satisfaction you get from life depends largely on your own ingenuity, self-sufficiency, and resourcefulness. People who wait around for life to supply their satisfaction usually find boredom instead."
- Dr. William Menninger

Originally distributed by MikeysFunnies.com, sent to me for some ungodly reason by my mother.

So I'm still hooked on Nyquil, I take like 8 doses a day in fact, mostly to ease the pain of work.

I got a ticket to Ozzfest, baby! Lots of good bands this year. I think I'm going to go with (give a ride there to) my drunken co-worker Butch and his also drunken 15-yr-old friend "Jimmy" or something. Although, since I refuse to stay to watch Ozzy (and suffer the horrible traffic afterwards) he insists he'll be taking a cab home (yeah right). Ozzy's daughter is sooo cute. I totally want to hook up with her even though she's 14 or something. She's Ozzy's daugher, too! MTV Cribs (good show) did a second Ozzy-house-tour thing since Ozzy and family are moving. This time instead of Ozzy giving the tour it was just his 2 kids, both of whom went from being little preppyish hipsters to uber punk rockers. Unfortunately, the girl kid (the cute 14-yr-old one) put on a little weight, but not too much I guess.

I've been on a little Blockbuster binge lately, so here are my too little (and way too late) and very important and relevant opinions on each of the movies I've rented this week:

SHAFT
	JAY'S RATING: ENTERTAINING(but terrible) Shaft is a terrible movie by most standards (plot, acting), but watching Samuel L Jackson be a bad-ass for 90 minutes is just damned entertaining. However, even in the 'bad-ass-cop do-gooder in evil world' category this is nowhere near as entertaining or good as films like LA Confidential or [any Jackie Chan movie]. I recommend renting it if you're bored and have nothing better to do.
ROAD TRIP
	JAY'S RATING: REALLY GOOD Funny, entertaining, etc.
CECIL B. DEMENTED
	JAY'S RATING: FUCKING UNWATCHABLE I only watched the first 15 minutes, but those 15 minutes were really goddamn boring. The acting is terrible, the set/costumes are hideous and there were no detectable subplots (just one big stupid wacky "plot" crawling along). If you're a fan of horrible B movies, this is a must-see. I'm not. I suspect this isn't the first time Artisan has fucked me out of a few dollars. Don't be fooled by pretty boxes and exciting trailers!
UNBREAKABLE
	JAY'S RATING: REALLY GOOD - (annoyances) Despite some annoying cinematography (that I eventually grew accustomed to), a stubborn refusal to show me one particular scene that I swear was in the trailer and a damned child actor (I hate kids in movies, except the Jerry McGuire kid of course) this turned out to be a pretty damned good movie. A little slow-moving, so you might want to get intoxicated beforehand, but definately worth a watch.
LITTLE NICKY
	JAY'S RATING: REALLY GOOD + (excellent soundtrack) Really good, funny, wacky (and yet cool), excellent soundtrack, excellent cast of entertaining characters, etc.
DOWN TO EARTH
	JAY'S RATING: NOT WORTH WATCHING (but you probably already knew that) Chris Rock is fun to watch, and the movie does have its moments, but Down to Earth sucks overall. It's a light-hearted, watered-down feel-good movie.

Nesby, my cat, is dead.

I'll miss her very much. She kept me company when no one else would. She was in all ways a pleasant and loving little friend.

May she rest in peace and, wherever she is, have access to all the drink, food and sunshine she could wish for.

Guess what! I do NOT have any pictures of Heather Havrilesky (although I did quote her one time and I've also attempted - in vain - to find pics of her). Ken Layne claims to hang out with her...ask him to take a picture of her (and send me a copy).

Also, I've never tried Heelys, let me know if they're as fun as they look.

Anyway, the new "design" is up and I've finally started archiving this crap (so the main page isn't 40Kb). I'm still working on the Links page. Of course, no one looks at my stupid journal on purpose so it doesn't matter :P.

Did I mention The Lovely Marla (an important character in the "old" version of this journal who I was completely infatuated with for a few months) is moving to Arizona to live with some guy she used to date? Sad, but true. I guess it doesn't make much difference to me since I never see her anyway, but it makes this stupid little town seem that much more empty.

Also, JT got his own apartment (no more rich roommate) and Kat is planning on moving to Florida to go to film school at the end of the summer.

I dropped my math class today (152 / calc 2). I slept through a week of class and didn't have the motivation to cram for the exam today (and struggle through the rest of the quarter). So now I'm only taking one class (world civ 3) for the second quarter in a row and generally not making much progress in life. Of course I'm still struggling with the What-The-Fuck-Do-I-Major-In dilemna. Life sucks.

Oh, and my Mom decided that we're all (Mom, [step-dad] Mike and me) going to "sit down and talk" sometime next week (about how things are going to be or something). In other words I have to become motivated or something. Idunno. I'm sure it will end in disaster (for me, that is).

I really have no idea what I'm going to do with my life. I have no friends, no cash, a really shitty job and none of my interests even vaguely translate into a career path. All jobs sound about the same, and they all have the same creepy social aspect and all industries (like every corner of the world) are infested with the same fucking filthy idiots.

All my clocks are fucked up, which is probably the cause of all my problems

I'm sitting in my boxers in front of a fan. It's kind of hot here (in central Ohio) and it's making me groggy (the heat, that is. Along with the half-dose of Nyquil I took a few minutes ago).

Ted Rall is a great political cartoonist/columnist.

Latest Cartoon: "The Resistance Continues...with President-In-Exile Al Gore!"

Talented bastard Ken Layne (one of my fave writers) had lunch with the infinitely lovely Heather Havrilesky (the best writer EVER)! He describes her as "charming", but doesn't say whether or not she's "hot".

Hurry up and buy Ken Layne's book already!

I think my parents are trying to starve me. There's never any fucking food in the cupboards. By the way, I'm 20 yrs old and live with my parents. But they still OWE ME FOOD!

I've had a "cold" for 3 fucking weeks. I've been on NyQuil/DayQuil for a solid week-and-a-half. I've come to the conclusion it's a sinus infection from snorting Special K.

I went to the doctor Thursday; he said I'm "running" a slight fever and have some phlegm in my lungs and gave me anti-biotics. The nurse seemed a little annoyed that I couldn't describe the buzz of Special K.

Fave Onion story: Doctors Find New Way To Prolong Meaningless Existence

I forgot how fun it is to torture my cat. I'll have to do it more often.

The Story That Ends With Horrible Disease Covering My Tongue

Two weeks ago I was hanging out with my quasi-friend Kat, having a typically unremarkable time (I'm not a very fun guy), when (I think) I mentioned that I had a headache. She said she (illegally) had some prescription liquid tylenol-with-codine-type stuff that would both get rid of my headache and give me a little "buzz". And then she was like, "oh, and I have a shitload of Special K that's been sitting around my apartment for a long time". So I was like "yeah, that would be okay. Let's do that" since I was bored, rarely do drugs and had done Special K in the past and had barely been affected by it.

It turns out Special K is a pretty fucking hardcore drug, so we both snorted lots of it and got pretty wasted... and then had unprotected sex. [typical post-sex story goes here]

blah blah blah

Anyway, the K gave me a sinus infection (which I still have 3 weeks later) which (unless some other horrible disease is doing this) resulted in my tongue having nasty dry little bumps, my tongue feeling like it's been burned and a bad taste in my mouth.