I sat and watched as one of my best friends and surrogate older brother said his vows, his voice crumbling with emotion and his eyes advertising to everyone in attendance how happy he was to be marrying the woman he had loved and worked so hard to keep loving for over 7 years.
Would I ever be that happy? Would I ever find a woman who wanted to be with me, wanted to be with Nick Carter, 20 year old computer game freak and water lover? Would I always have to wonder if the woman at the bar who bought me a drink was doing it because she wanted to get to know me better because she thought I was good looking or was it because she saw the dollar signs attached to my ass.
My best friend Brian would be the next to walk down the aisle and kiss his lonliness and years of dating frustrations good bye. AJ was already looking at rings and with all certainty he would probably follow Kentucky's Finest Cousins down the aisle shortly.
I had always imagined playing the field, showing up at a different event with a different woman on my arm each time. The truth was I didn't want all the tricks and emotions that went along with the games that women played while they tried to pull me in. I saw how my friend's lives had changed when they found their soul mated .I wanted that. Was it asking too much to find a woman with a beautiful heart and an understanding personality.
Howie nudged me "Nick, they kissed, stand up, they are leaving"
Back to my world of loneliness.......
I cringed slightly and rolled my eyes as Kevin broke down as he toasted Kristin. I know I should be happy for him but holy hell I was on true love overload. I sipped my champagne and pleaded silently for the night to be over so I could go home, sit on my boat and let the soothing waves and rocking motion send me into a deep sleep.
"Nick are you okay?" My best friend stood over me, his hand on my shoulder, his face knotted in an expression of concern and worry. Brian, the one who totally understood my mood swings and has been my saviour since the day I walked into Trans Con and was introduced to him.
"I'm fine, just tired" I brushed him off.
"Nick I know this is hard but this will happen to you, maybe not as soon or as smoothly as you want but it will happen"
I looked at Brian and said a silent prayer that he was right.
~~**~~
I stripped off my tuxedo and left it on a heap on the floor. All I wanted to was walk down the path to from my house, hop on my boat and forget about the wedding and all the true love shit that had been floating around me, mocking me. I glanced at my blinking answering machine, it was probably my mother or Brian so I ignored it and walked outside
~~**~~
My legs dangled over the edge of my boat. The cool air made goosepimples appear on ,y bare arms but at that moment nothing seemed more right then to be staring out into the darkness and being soothed by the peacefullness of the night.
Why was it so hard for me to find someone? It seemed that all of the guys had met their dream women and then BAM fell in love, whereas I was left to brush off slut after slut who were more interested in stroking my wallet then me. I know I sound brutal and ungrateful but if I had only known that being named one of People's 50 Most Beautiful People would have left me feeling this lonely and depressed I might have been content with staying in school and being a normal guy.
"Jen where is the file on the new client? Willaford and Carter or something like that?" Avery looked at the fabric swatches that cluttered her already messy desk and sighed. She knew that if she ever became big she would need to hire more designers but this was her baby and the idea of sharing it with anyone else urked her. On a more proffesional level her reputation was impecable and she was petrified of someone else tarnishing it.
Avery Sims was 24, a recent graduate of Boston U, where she studied architecture and interior design science. She had moved to Orlando right after graduation and bought a studio, cheap, in a seedier area of town and so became Avery Sims Design and Consulting Firm. She worked long hours and sometimes could barely make rent but recently things had picked up and she could now afford to relocate to a bigger studio and finish decorating her loft.
The only thing that left her from being completely happy was the fact that her husband, soon to be ex Jeffrey wasn't signing the divorce papers she had server him with. They had been married at 20, right out of university. He had studied law and now had one of the biggest law firms in Orlando. He had signed the loan for her studio and business and had encouraged her. He had swept her off her feet for the first years of the marriage but had sent her crashing back to reality when it was discovered that he had been cheating on her since 2 months into the marriage. He was a ladies man with an insatiable appetite for sex. Avery had been devestated and kicked him out and had been single ever since.
"Here it is" Jen, her petite personal assistant, exclaimed, handing her the file. "The address and everything is here, your appointment is in 50 minutes, it's a long hike so you may want to leave now"
~~**~~
Avery stood impatiently on the step, waiting for someone to answer the bell, which she had rung 4 times. "Screw it" she mumbled as she walked towards her car but stopped when she saw a sleek mercedes pull into the laneway. "Are you Mr Carter?" she asked, slightly annoyed, to the very handsome tattooed man.
"No I am AJ MacLean, my friend Nick owns this place. IS he not here?"
"Not that I see, I have an appointment wit him" Avery's voice dripping with displeasure.
"I bet he is at the dock, I don't know why he doesn't sell the house and move out there for all the time he spends there" AJ led her down the steep slope, offering her his hand to ensure she didn't slip.
"Nick you have a visitor?"
I looked up and saw my friend standing in front of me with a very attractive, but obviously ticked woman. "Can I help you?"
"I am Avery Sims, from Avery Sims Designs. We had a 3 pm appointment to discuss some image repair to your house."
I looked at her strangely and then it hit me "Was this appointment made by a Miss Willaford?'
"Yes, I am not sure I understand what the problem is?"
"Typical, she was prepared to spend more of my money. I am sorry Miss Sims, but my ex girlfriend made that appointment and since we are no longer together and I am happy with my house I am in no need of your services. I will have my accountant send you a check to cover your inconveniance" God I sounded like such a rich and snobby prick. I looked at her and hung my head, fiddling with the coal pencil in my hand.
Avery stared at me, her eyes filled with contempt "Do me and all the other working people a favour Mr Carter, next time you dump one of your bimbos make sure you clean up after her. I can't be traipsing around town chasing dead end appointments. Some of us have bills to pay" Avery flicked her business card at me and walked quickly off the dock.
Bone and I watched her struggle up the hill with her fitted business suit and heels "Should I help her?" I asked.
"Are you insane? Did you see her temper, I bet she is one of those women libbers who would rather die then have a man help her, I won't ever see you again if she goes apey on you." AJ teased.
I sat on my boat staring out at the water. AJ had left about 20 minutes ago and now I was left with trying to figure out how to apoligize for being so prima donna with Miss Sims, who had only been trying to do her job.
AJ told me I was really brash with her but really I don't remember. I don't tend to remember a lot anymore when it comes to my emotions. I have been on the no emotion kick since Mandy left me 2 months ago. I always deep down knew she would tire of me and move onto the next big thing but I tricked myself into caring for her, I had needed someone to love me so bad that I had turned to her.
The fans think they want to be my soul mate, well believe me when I tell you my love isn't all it's fucking cracked up to be.
Flowers, flowers ought to mend any hard feelings. I reached for my cell and placed an order.
~~**~~
"I take it the meeting didn't go well" Jen observes as Avery walked into the office, her face on fire, her hands clenched.
"He was such a prick, apparently his little "Fuck Friend" ordered my services without consulting him and now they are no longer doing the twisted sheet tango which means my ass is out the money that would have helped pay for the loan" Avery looked at Jen who was near laughter at the image that Avery had put in her head. "So instead of letting me down gently he gets all snotty with me so I got pissed off"
"NO...not you..imagine that" Jen said sarcastically.
"Anyway so I gave him shit, threw my card at him and walked away. All the way back here I have been trying to figure out a way to apoligize, the guy is obviously connected, shit you should see his house. The last thing I want to do is burn bridges." Avery sank into her high backed leather chair and looked up at the ceiling "Can you send a guy flowers?"
"Cheeeeeeeeeeeesy" Jen replied.
"Fruit basket?"
"You really don't want me to respond to that, right?"
"What the hell do I send him then?" Avery looked at the pencil on her desk and it came to her. "I am going out for a few, be back soon" she quickly walked out of the office, leaving Jen standing in the office.
~~**~~
"Thanks" I handed the delivery guy a tip and took the huge basket into my living room. I sat down cross legged on the floor and opened the card
"Mr Carter
I am apologizing for my unprofessional conduct this afternoon. I am not sure if it was the long ride out to your house or just poor control of my temper but either way I am sincerely sorry for yelling at you.
If you ever do reconsider remodelling I would be happy to offer you a discount as another apology for the way I acted
Truly
Avery Sims"
I grinned "Great minds think alike" I said as I tore open the gift. I was speechless as I took in what was in front of my eyes. Avery had filled the basket with new drawing pencils, sketch books, pads and sunblock. On the bottle of sun block was a note "I saw that you were getting a little crispy while you were drawing"
I smiled and went to call Brian.
~~**~~
"Ave there is a delivery for you" Jen called from the front office.
"Bring it in" Avery said absent mindedly.
"Someone likes you" Jen teased as she carried a huge bouquet of wild flowers. "Someone has a secret admirer"
"Yah sure, it is probably the Matthews thanking me for finishing the house early" Avery opened the card and her mouth fell open.
"Miss Sims
Please take this as an apology for the harsh manner in which I ended our conversation.
I hope that you will consider this a peace offering
Yours
Nick Carter
"How do I always let you talk me into these things?" I groaned as AJ, Amanda, Howie and I entered the crowded bar. I was really not a club person, I was more at home in front of a computer game, watching television or sailing on my boat. I hated crowds and with the level that my self esteem was at, one rejection and I might lose what little dignity I had.
"Come on Nick, there are plenty of fine looking honies ripe for the picking, though hands off this little peach" AJ kissed Amanda "Have I mentioned that I could eat a peach for hours...with no hands?"
I groaned and walked over to the bar, scoping out the action on the dance floor. I saw a familiar face and tried to hide my smile when she walked towards me. It was Avery. Her short brown hair framed her face, her bangs pinned behind her ears, making her huge eyes stand out. She wore no makeup except for the gloss that painted her lips. The thing that made her over the top attractive was the way she carried herself. She was a chubby girl but she had a beautiful and proud posture and her full hips swayed confidently. She was wearing a low cut, fitted black shirt and fitted charcoal pants. I blinked and tried to clear my head as she made her way to the bar. I hung my head and tried to avoid contact with her, unsure if she had fully forgiven me.
"Hello Mr Carter" her soft and bubbly voice entered my mind above the pulsating music.
"Hi Miss Sims"
"Now that the formalities are over I am Avery" she smiled and took my hand " I loved the flowers, most men would send roses but your selection was perfect, nothing phoney or pretentious about wild flowers"
"I am glad you like them. They remind me of my nana;s country home so I try to buy them whenever possible." "You goof" I scolded myself. "Thank you for the art package. That was the most thoughtful and personal gift I have ever received"
Avery beamed and I could tell she was sighing with relief "I was so worried you would think it was cheesy. Can I buy you a drink, or will that ruin your manly image" She teased.
"Hell you can buy me a drink, I have no pride when it comes to a beautiful woman buying me a drink" "IDIOT BOY" I screamed inside.
"I see you have the charm oozing tonight" Avery giggled and ordered our drinks.
"Who are you here with?" I asked.
"Friends from college. Once a week we get together, this week was this meat market..lucky me. I HATE these places. If one more guy cops a feel or talks to my tits I swear I am going to go postal and start talking to their non existent dicks"
My mouth dropped open and I guess it was visable as Avery started to laugh "Guess you aren't used to women speaking their minds huh? Here's to big mouthed women. May you find one that will blow your....well blow your mind"
Avery and I toasted and laughed, both in our own world. Avery looked at her watch and saw her friends gesturing "Oh goodie, they are sick of this place can't wait to see where we are going next. It was a pleasure to meet you on better circumstances Nick"
"Have a great night" I shook her hand and watched as she held her glass above her head as she worked her way through the crowd and left giggling with her friends, winking at me as she left.
Avery looked over her shoulder one more time at the blonde man, she had been prepared for him to be cocky and full of himself like he was on the dock but she was surprised at how nervous and almost shy he was. "Nice to know that second impressions are better then the first"
~one week later~
"Are you still staring at that business card?" Brian flopped down beside me and ripped the card out of my hand. "Avery Sims, President" he made a face and laughed "You know looking at her card isn't going to make her call you out of the blue. Bite the big one and here's a concept...call her. Tell her you have reconsidered and want to hire her" he looked at me as
I raised my eyebrow "As your decorator idiot boy" he laughed.
I grinned "you know I really do hate that pasty pink shit that Mandah painted my bathroom, it reminds me of cotton candy, I get a tooth ache everytime I take a shit, hand me that card"
"Avery Designs"
"May I speak with Avery Sims please" I tried to sound calm and collected instead of nervous and shaky.
"I am sorry she is out of the office, may I take a message?"
"I am interested in striking a contract with her to re decorate my house" I looked at Brian and tried not to laugh as he batted his eyelashes. The guy might be 25 and almost married but he could still be a wise ass.
"May I have your name please"
"Yes, of course, I am sorry. It's Nick Carter"
"Mr Carter?" she asked, her voice full of disbelief.
"Yes, she was out to my house last week and after some thought I have decided to consult with her. Will she be returning my call today?"
"I will make sure she gets your message when she calls in. Have a wonderful day Mr. Carter" and she hung up.
"She wasn't there, but I think she talked about me"
"Really?"
"Yes, the woman on the phone damn near fell off her chair when I told her who I was. Guess she knows about our little run in, what time is Leigh expecting you home?"
"She is working late" Brian knew what I was implying and grabbed the basketball that was sitting beside the couch "Aren't you going to wait around for her call?"
" I did learn something from AJ's babbling, he always said never sit around and wait by the phone for some to chick to call" I grabbed my sweatshirt "besides I gave her my cell number"
Brian grinned and followed me out to the court.
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