"You didn't," Nick was laughing, listening to her tell about playing soccer in elementary school.
"Yup!" She nodded, and snuggled tighter into his arms. They were sitting out on the beach, Chris sitting between Nick's legs, leaning back against his chest, but the sun had gone down long ago and it was getting cold. "As the goalie, I kicked the ball right over my head into my own goal."
"You were terrible, huh." He grinned.
"Not made to play soccer, that's for sure." She smiled, turning to look at him.
"What?"
"Nothing," she shrugged. "Just wanted to look at you." She'd been trying to get a look at his eyes, but it was too dark to see them well. He was smiling from ear to ear though, that much she saw.
"Want an autograph too?" Nick joked.
"What would it say?" Chris asked, grinning.
Nick bit his lip and took a deep breath. It was now or never. "Chrissy, we're real. Love, Nick."
Chris stared at Nick, speechless. Did that mean what she thought that meant?
He bent down and pressed his lips to hers, gently, sweetly kissing her. It only lasted an instant, but he was still breathless when he pulled away. "We are." Before she could speak, he stood up, pulling her up with him. "It's getting cold out here, you're shivering."
Chris noticed that indeed she was. She wasn't sure if it was from the cold though. She walked back to her bungalow with Nick holding hands, a thousand things going through her head. What was Nick doing. What was SHE doing? They walked into the bungalow and sat down on her couch, cuddling up together.
Nick cupped her face in his hands and kissed her again, with just a teeny bit more pressure than before. His lips slid their way down to her neck, his hands moving down her back.
"Nick," she said breathlessly, "we shouldn't."
Nick continued kissing her neck, and whispered into her ear, "I love you, Chrissy."
"Nick..."
He stopped and looked into her eyes, blue eyes wide. "I think you love me too."
Her eyes filled with tears as she looked at him. Of course she loved him. "I do, Nick, but that's not all there is here."
He took her hands, surrounded them with both of his. "Right now, Chris, that's all there is." He bent down and kissed her again, his tongue tentatively exploring her mouth, feeling her tremble slightly before pulling away. "You like that, I know you do. Why fight this?" he pleaded. "We belong together Chris."
"The cameras..."
"Aren't here." Nick finished her sentence. "I have thought about this long and hard, and fact is, we're alone, without cameras, until Monday. When the cameras come back, we can go back to the way we were. But until then, I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone in my life, and I love you more than I've ever loved anyone. I've wanted you for 5 months, Chris, I don't want to wait anymore. Please tell me you want me too."
A tear ran down Chris' cheek, "I want you, Nick," she said in a voice she didn't recognize, her hand reaching up to pull his head down to hers.
Nick's eyes glassy with desire, he gladly complied, covering her mouth with his. She opened her mouth, moaning when she felt his tongue flicker over her teeth. Nick's hand made its way around to Chris' stomach and began creeping up her shirt.
"Nick, are you sure?" Chris pulled away slightly, looking at him closely. "This feels wrong, still."
"I have never been more sure of anything in my life," he said gruffly, standing up. He picked her up and carried her into the bedroom, gently setting her down on the bed.
Chris lay there, looking up at him, amazed this beautiful man could want her. She reached her arms up and he bent down to kiss her, gently settling his weight on her body.
"I don't want to hurt you," he said softly, tracing a line down her face, following his finger with soft kisses.
"You won't, Nicky," she looked into his eyes, her heart stopping when she saw the lust in there. She ran her hands down his back, searching for the bottom of his shirt.
Guessing what she wanted, Nick sat up slightly and pulled his shirt over his head, grinning when he saw her reaction. "You like?"
She just reached up and ran her hands over his chest. "I don't see you shirtless often enough." She bent her head and licked his nipple, hearing him gasp in reply.
Nick pulled Chris' tank off, and deftly undid her bra, flinging it to the side. "You're beautiful," he murmured, running a finger lightly across her nipple, smiling when he saw it harden.
"Oh, Nick," she breathed, kissing him deeply, her tongue diving deep into his mouth, trying to take all of him in. Her hands dug into his hair, pulling his head as close to her as she could.
His hands were everywhere, much as she'd remembered from the Haunted House. Her hair, her stomach, her chest, playing with her nipples until she moaned. Nick broke the kiss, breathing heavily, and fell on her neck, licking the sensitive area until she was squirming beneath him. "I could keep doing this forever," he whispered.
Chris needed more, and soon. She reached down to his shorts, and pushed them down along with his boxers, sliding over the soft skin of his butt. He groaned when her hands found his shaft, running up and down the length, stroking him softly.
"No, Chris," he gently took her hands and placed them back on the bed. "I want to go slow."
"I want you, Nick," she slid off her shorts and underwear, throwing them across the room. She may not have been sure about this before, but now she wanted nothing in the world more. She pulled him to her, kissing him.
"All in time," he grinned, before bending his head to take her nipple in his mouth. He was rewarded with a cry from Chris, her hands returning to his hair. His other hand made its way to the crevice of her thighs, her legs involuntarily parting at his touch.
"Nick," she moaned as one of his fingers slipped inside of her, another tracing lazy circles around her button. "That feels so good."
"I love you, Chrissy," he whispered as he started kissing his way down her stomach, his fingers never stopping their movements below. His tongue flicked into her navel, and her back arched in response, no pain this time. He lay between her legs and took her into his mouth, sucking on her deeply. As she cried out, his tongue licked her up and down, slowly, deliberately.
"Oh god," she gasped, feeling his hands grab hers and hold them down. Her hips were bucking into his face, her body no longer hers. "Nick."
The sound of his name on her lips made his heart soar, her voice full of passion. Nick had to let her hands go to hold her hips down, since he had no intention of stopping. He sucked and licked and listened to her carefully, slowing down when her cries got too loud. He wanted this to take as long as possible, he had never wanted to pleasure another person so much in his life. Finally, his mouth getting tired, he took her over the edge, hanging on while her cries turned to screams, then pants as she tried to regain her breath.
"Wow." Chris pulled him back up, kissing him, tasting herself on his mouth. "That was amazing."
"I'm not done yet," he grinned.
"I should hope not," Chris reached down to stroke him again, noticing that he'd managed to grow even larger since she'd felt him before. "I want you inside me," she rasped. "Now."
Nick looked into her eyes and kissed her, "I love you." Spreading her legs gently, he slowly pushed inside of her, trembling slightly. He'd never felt such a need to be so gentle, so tender. Everything had to be perfect.
Chris pushed up against him, wanting more, all of him inside of her. "More," she gasped, pulling his lips down to hers, capturing him in a passionate kiss.
Nick began moving in and out, their bodies slowly finding a rhythm. His hands found her nipples again, teasing them, listening to her gasps as he went. He couldn't believe how hot and wet she was, how incredible he felt inside her. It was like she was a perfect fit, so tight. He felt her muscles clench around him and cried out.
She dug her nails into his back, desperate to feel him deeper inside of her. "Harder," she moaned, looking into his eyes. She saw such love, such passion there, such tenderness. And with him inside her, she felt complete.
Nick happily obliged her request, his movements becoming a little rougher, pushing deeper and deeper inside of her with each thrust. "Keep your eyes open," he said breathlessly, looking at her. "I want to see your face when you come."
That was the most erotic thing Chris had ever heard, and she struggled to keep her eyes open. Staring into Nick's blue eyes, she felt so joined with him, feeling him moving inside her. "I love you," she whispered as she strained up against him, wanting even more, needing more.
"I love you too," Nick gasped, pushing into her with all his strength, feeling her body tightening around him. She was almost there. He quickened his thrusts, hanging on as long as possible, her cries in tune with his. With a final push they both went over the edge, her cries of his name and the spasms inside of her setting him off, lost in each other's eyes.
They lay there, Nick's head on Chris' chest, trying to regain their breath. "Wow."
"Yeah. Wow." Chris said softly, running her hands over his back, pulling him close.
"Now THAT was real," he grinned.
Chris kissed him deeply, her hands moving down his body. "I think we both need a lot more reality."
"I think so too."
A Day in the Life Of... Day 128 St. Maarten CAMERAS OFF
"Here I'd been thinking we wouldn't see you until Monday." Julia walked into the kitchen, surprised to find AJ holding a cup of coffee. "And please tell me you didn't make that?"
AJ laughed, and shook his head. "Leighanne did. And as for the rest," he winked, "I wore the poor girl out."
Julia poured herself a cup and pointed towards the pool. "I'm going to take this outside, care to join me?"
"Naw, thanks," he held up the cup, "gotta bring some of this back to the lady. I think Leighanne's still out there though, and Howie was around here somewhere."
"Have fun," she waved, and let herself out. "Morning!"
"Aren't you in a wonderful mood," Leighanne greeted her. "You've been a ray of sunshine since we came down here."
Julia settled into a chair and sighed. "Yeah, I think I just really needed to get away from everything for a while. Being down here has been fantastic."
"It's only Saturday, not over yet."
"Yeah." Julia looked at Leighanne. "You know, I've seen you since we've been here, but I don't think I've seen Brian once. Has he been having fun?"
Leighanne blushed. "He has. He's, um, sleeping now."
Julia laughed. "Nothing to be embarrassed about, chickie, enjoy yourselves."
"I think something's going on with Kevin and Kristen, though." Leighanne said in a near whisper.
"Going on?" Julia tried not to react at all.
Leighanne shrugged. "I don't actually know anything. But Brian's been acting really strange, I'd thought it would be fun to go out to dinner with Kevin and Kristen tonight up at the restaurant, get all dressed up? He wants nothing to do with Kevin. And you know how close they are normally, it's weird."
"Maybe he'd just rather spend the time alone with you?" Julia offered. So Nick had told Brian about her and Kevin, sounded like. No way was she going to tell Leighanne, enough damage had been done already.
"Nope, he suggested we invite Chris and Nick."
"That should be fun, dinner with the perfect couple who won't admit they're the perfect couple." Julia snorted. "I swear, if I have to rip their clothes off myself and throw them together myself..."
Leighanne laughed. "Brian and AJ had a long talk with Nick yesterday when they went diving. The way Brian put it...Nick had decided he'd waited long enough."
"So last night?"
"Dunno." She shrugged. "Haven't seen either Nick or Chris yet today."
Julia grinned. "That's a good sign, then, Chris still without coffee this late in the morning, something's gotta be distracting her."
***************************************************
Distracted would be an understatement. Nick was once again proving how much he loved 'taking it slow,' moving in and out of her at an excruciatingly slow pace, laughing as she squirmed and writhed beneath him.
"You're a bastard." She dug her nails into his back and tried to pull him closer to her.
"I love you," he smiled. Last night, this morning, it all felt like a fantasy. He'd woken up to her mouth wrapped around him, her hands running across his chest. She'd told him that it was payback for not letting her do it last night, and didn't stop until she'd sucked him dry. He'd promptly flipped her over and taken his revenge, and was enjoying it immensely.
All she could do was moan as he slowly increased the pressure of his thrusts, her legs wrapped around his back. "Please, Nick..."
He obliged with a smile, finding her rhythm and following it, pushing deeper and deeper inside of her with each thrust, crying her name as he felt her melt around him.
"Good morning.." He held her close, feeling her body trembling in the afterglow.
She smiled and kissed him deeply, running her tongue into his mouth. "Good morning."
He hugged her tight, and looked into her eyes. "Wanna stay here all day?"
She laughed. "You asked me that yesterday, too."
"It's a little different today." He grinned.
Everything was different today, Chris thought. She felt like an entirely new person. Happy, loved, and god, the sex...they'd gotten very little sleep the night before, it seemed like every time one of them dozed off, the other's hand or mouth would start wandering, and then they'd be at it again. They'd explored each other's bodies all night long, learning what each sound, each movement meant, getting to know those subtle signs that made everything so much better. Nick was right, damn the consequences. This was better than any drug in the world.
"Come back," Nick kissed her gently, pulling her head close to hers. "What were you thinking?"
"Just how amazing you make me feel." She stretched out next to him, her body pressed up against his. "And how amazing you are."
"You're the one who's amazing." He smiled, tracing a line down her face. "And you make me feel amazing too."
Chris shuddered as Nick's finger continued down her neck, making its way towards her breast, "We really should get out of bed."
"I guess so." He sighed. "You probably need your coffee."
Chris grinned and kissed him. "Yeah, I do."
"How about I show you that diving cove?" With a final kiss, Nick got out of bed and looked around for his clothes.
"Sounds good." She laughed at him standing naked, searching the room with a confused expression on his face. "I think I threw your pants somewhere over there," she waved.
"We had fun last night, huh," he laughed, looking at the pieces of clothes thrown all over the room.
"Yeah." She grinned and got up, pulling the sheet around her. "I'm gonna go take a shower. Meet you at the main house?"
"Ok." He pulled her in for a final kiss, kissing her deeply. "I will get that shower with you before we leave here."
"Ok." She smiled. "Gotta save something for later, ya know."
Nick found his pants and pulled them on as he made his way to the door. "Wear a bathing suit this time too, wouldya?"
"Yeah, yeah."
***************************************************
Chris poured herself a cup of coffee and walked out to the pool, waving when she found Julia and Leighanne there, working on their tans. "Morning, ladies."
"Afternoon, Chrissy darling." Julia snickered. "It's 1 in the afternoon, in case you haven't noticed."
Chris sat down and tried to hide her blushing face. "Oh."
"So where have you been all morning?" Julia asked pointedly.
"I slept late." Chris took a gulp of her coffee.
"Sure." Leighanne laughed. "With?"
Chris nearly choked on her coffee. "Damn Julia, you're a bad influence on Leighanne."
"No, she's fine," Leighanne grinned. "So?"
"So, Nick and I slept late."
"Right." Julia walked over to Chris' chair and sat down next to her, snatching her coffee cup out of her hands. "I'm not giving this back until you spill."
Chris protested and reached for the coffee, but Julia passed it to Leighanne out of her reach. "Come on."
"Spill!"
"Ok, ok. It was amazing." Chris couldn't help the grin that covered her face as she remembered.
"Oh my, full on fuck face," Julia pointed to Chris' face. "Leighanne, that's the sign of someone who's had really good sex. A lot of it."
Chris nodded and held her hand out for her coffee. "Can I have it back now?"
"No!" Julia reprimanded. "I've been waiting for this moment for a long time, ya know, I want details."
"Like what." Chris sighed, and looked at her coffee in Leighanne's hand wistfully.
"How many times?"
Chris laughed. "He's 20. I'd forgotten what that means."
"And exactly what does that mean?" Julia raised an eyebrow.
"He, um, comes back quickly." She giggled.
"So how many times?"
"I have no idea, Julia, really, I wasn't counting." Chris rolled her eyes. "Anyway, it wasn't like anything I'd ever experienced before, it was a lot less of an act, and a lot more of just...I dunno...I already knew Nick SO well..."
"..the only way possible to express how much you love the other person." Leighanne finished Chris' sentence. "I felt like that the first time Brian and I were together," she explained. "Still feels like that, actually." She finished with a smile.
Chris nodded. "I was all scared, it felt so wrong, right up until we actually started really doing it...Then everything just felt perfect, like it was meant to be."
"Damn Chris, only you would be terrified to kiss Nick Carter." Julia laughed. "You can have your coffee back now."
Chris accepted her coffee with a grateful smile. "I need this, I didn't get much sleep last night."
"I can imagine." Julia's tone became serious. "Now, I've asked you this many a time, and you've always refused to answer. I have returned your coffee, so now I want an honest answer. How big is little Nicky?"
Chris gasped. "Julia!"
"Come on, I gotta know, you know what those fan sites love to say."
"What."
"The youngest...is the largest."
"Oh, I'm huge, baby." Nick made his way over to them, laughing at Julia.
"How long have you been listening!" Julia glared at Nick. "No fair, listening in on girl talk."
"I didn't hear much," Nick sat down next to Chris on her chair, kissing her hello. "You got your coffee?"
Chris nodded, extremely embarrassed. "Sorry about that."
Nick grinned and hugged her. "I know girls talk about everything, don't worry about it. I have sisters, remember." He looked at Julia, "And I'm not LITTLE Nicky."
Julia choked on her coffee and stared at Nick.
"So," Leighanne jumped in to save the day. "You and Chris going to come to dinner with Brian and me tonight?"
"I forgot to ask Chris last night," he smiled, "other stuff, um, came up."
Chris laughed, yeah, 'little Nicky' came up alright. "Ok, so ask now," she looked at him. "Dinner?"
"Yeah, a nice dinner up at the resort, we can get all dressed up and stuff?"
"Sounds like fun." She smiled.
"Ok, I'll get Brian to make the reservations." Leighanne got up. "I should go see if he's awake, bring him some coffee."
"You're just going to wear him out some more," Julia laughed. "See you later, I'm going to go check out the gym."
Chris kissed Nick after the girls left, hugging him tight. "I could get used to this."
"So could I." He held her close and buried his head in her hair. "I ordered box lunches, so we can take them to the diving cove. Sound good?"
"Sounds wonderful." They held each other, swaying slightly for a while, "I guess that means we should get up."
"Yeah." He made no effort to move, just rubbed her back, feeling the straps of her bathing suit underneath. "Hey! You're wearing a suit!"
Chris laughed, "We're going diving, right?"
"Yeah." He stood up, pulling her with him. "Ok, let's go."
**********************************************************
"Fine. Don't tell me what's going on. Then spend this vacation alone, understand?" Kristen slammed the door behind her as she left the bungalow, Kevin yelling after her to stop. She KNEW something was wrong, he hadn't been acting right for the last few weeks. If only he'd tell her what it was, then she could help him. But she wouldn't put up with lies, she knew him too well for that.
"Kristen?" Brian was on his way to the beach, towel and chair in hand. "Are you ok?"
She shook her head, "Kevin's being a jerk again." Brian dropped the stuff he was holding and hugged her. "You know Kev, he loves you more than anything."
Kristen shook off the hug. "We're married now, I shouldn't have to put up with this bullshit. He's been acting like another person the last couple of weeks, and I don't like it."
"Want me to talk to him?" Brian offered.
"I don't know if it would help, but I guess," she shrugged. "We have a stocked bar in the main house, right? I'm going to go find it and sit by the pool."
Brian watched her walk away and looked towards Kevin's bungalow. He saw Kevin watching Kristen leave, and him slam the door. Shaking his head, he went to find Leighanne, he'd talk to Kevin later. Watching Kevin's marriage fall apart, he loved and appreciated what he had with Leighanne more than ever, and intended to make sure she knew that.
********************************************************
"This is beautiful," Chris breathed as they made their way towards the cove. It was a little section of beach with rocks overhanging it above, where the boys had such fun diving yesterday. You could climb the rocks fairly easily, it almost looked like steps had been built in. With the clear blue water and white sand below, it looked like a little piece of paradise. Not another soul to be seen for miles, and nothing but ocean in front.
"Yeah, isn't it cool?" Nick set their stuff down on the sand and pulled his shirt off. "Want to go in the water?"
Chris grinned and ran her hands over his chest. "I guess."
He laughed and kissed her deeply. "Unless you'd rather do something else, we are very much alone here."
She shivered, and pulled away. "Naw, I want to go diving." She pulled off her shirt and shorts, and took his hand. "Let's go."
They climbed up the rocks and jumped into the water, laughing when they landed. Chris immediately started searching the ocean floor for coral, swimming around underwater. The two goofed around in the water for hours, trying to best each other with dives from the rocks, hunting for the best seashells, until their eyes were bright red and their skin was all shriveled.
They finally ran out of the water, lips chattering, the sun starting to go down. "You like to swim as much as me," Nick laughed, handing Chris a towel.
"My parents called me a fish when I was a kid," she shook the excess water off of her hair. "I literally would spend all day in the water every summer, between swim team and dive team."
"I definitely love you." Nick pulled her close and kissed her.
"I love you too," She whispered, returning his kiss eagerly, her hands running through his hair. "Make love to me, Nick."
She didn't have to ask twice.
***********************************************
Chris stood in the shower, trying to clean sand out of all those nasty places sand seems to end up when you're lying naked on a beach. They'd rolled around on the beach for far too long, and Brian and Leighanne had been waiting for them when they got back, it was time for dinner. She quickly washed her hair and stepped out of the shower, toweling herself off. She still couldn't believe this was her life. She'd just made love on the beach at sunset with a man who loved her. People did that in movies, not in real life.
Checking the closet, she pulled on her black dress. She slipped into a pair of black sandals, ran a comb through her wet hair, put on a tiny bit of makeup, and she was ready. She walked out of the bungalow, finding Nick, Brian and Leighanne waiting for her.
"Wow, look at you," she kissed Nick, looking over his suit and tie. "You look great."
"You too." He put his arm around her shoulders. "We're going to walk up the beach to the resort, that ok?"
"Sure." She took off her sandals and held them up. "No problem."
"I'm doing the same," Leighanne held up her shoes. "Much easier."
Chris grinned. "Let's go, I'm starving."
The couples walked the beach, hand in hand, chattering about how much fun they'd been having. Brian and Nick hadn't been spending as much time together lately as they were used to, and they jabbered away, catching up on anything and everything. Leighanne found a pretty coral to show to Chris, and the girls hung back, getting some time to talk alone.
"Julia only asked you about the sex," Leighanne said softly, walking slowly behind Brian and Nick. "How are you doing? Overall?"
Chris smiled. "I feel absolutely wonderful. Like everything is right with the world."
"And Monday?"
Chris' face fell. "I don't know." She walked for a while, kicking sand with her feet. "Nick said we should live in the moment. That we can go back to the way we were when Monday comes."
"Can you?"
"I don't know," she looked at Nick walking in front of her, bouncing as he went, joking around with Brian. "It's weird, it's not like we didn't spend every spare moment together before, right? We just weren't having sex."
"It's not the sex, Chris. It's that you two weren't talking about how you felt about each other." Leighanne swung her sandals for emphasis. "He DID finally tell you that he loves you, right?"
Chris nodded. "I love him too."
"Of course you do." She laughed. "We've all known that for a long time. It was the two of you who were too stubborn to admit it."
"You're making it sound like this was bound to happen."
"You said yourself it feels perfect, doesn't that mean that it was?"
"I guess. But then how do we go back?"
Leighanne sighed. "I don't think you can, sweetie."
"The cameras come back when we step off that plane Monday morning. This can't...oh god..." Chris' voice broke off. She couldn't imagine what would happen if her and Nick were 'a couple' on camera. Bad things, that's all. She would cease to be Chris Johnson, Executive Producer of a show for MTV, and become the girl who was sleeping with Nick Carter, Backstreet Boy. The 'dirty older woman,' even.
"It won't be so bad, Chris," Leighanne reassured her. "You get used to it, after a while." She'd certainly had her share of hate aimed at her for dating Brian.
Chris pushed all bad thoughts out of her mind. "Monday's going to be a very hard day. But it's Saturday, and I want to have fun until then." She looked at Nick and her heart dropped. "This might be our only time together, like this."
The girls caught up with the guys and linked arms as they walked into the main resort. "Oh man," Brian looked at the casino and drooled.
"Oh no," Leighanne grabbed him and pulled him towards the restaurant. "We're going to eat."
"Definitely need food." No argument from Nick, who dragged Chris away from the board advertising boat rentals she'd been staring at.
The four were seated in no time, and raising glasses of wine to toast the trip. "To MTV!" Brian laughed. "Without whom none of this would be possible."
They all clinked glasses and drank, laughing over how MTV could do such good. They enjoyed a long, relaxing dinner by candlelight, fueled by lots of good wine, good food and good talk. Nick and Brian entertained with stories of 'Frick and Frack,' and Chris told of some of the strangest things she'd ever caught on camera. When the restaurant started closing around them, it was time to go.
"God, how late is it?" Leighanne clung slightly to Brian for support. They had gone through a number of bottles of wine, and all of them were feeling it.
"Late." Brian put his arm around her, holding her up. "I think we should get a ride back."
"I want to walk," Chris pulled on Nick's arm. She was drunk too, but she loved to walk on the beach at night, and this would be fun. "Come walk with me."
"Gotta do what the lady wants," Nick grinned. "See you two tomorrow!" he waved as
Chris pulled him out of the restaurant.
"Enjoy dinner, did you?" he laughed as she skipped down to the beach, sandals in hand.
"Yes." She spun around to face him, grinning ear to ear. She reached her arms out to him and he pulled her into a big hug. "Good company."
"Very good company," he captured her lips with his, his tongue finding its way into her mouth, playing with hers. His arms slid down her back and cupped her butt, pulling her hips into his. He was rewarded with a moan from Chris, and pulled away, smiling. "I've been wanting to do that all night."
"All you had to do was ask," Chris pulled his head back down to hers, sucking on his bottom lip, her tongue exploring his mouth. She ran her hands through his hair, kissing him as deeply as she could. She finally pulled away, breathless, and began walking down the beach, leaving Nick behind.
"Hey!" He called after her, running to catch up. "You just gonna leave me?"
Chris turned to look at him, smiling. "I figured we'd better start walking, or else we're never gonna get back."
"So?" Nick tackled her, ending up on top of her on the sand. He grabbed her arms and held them down, sitting on her hips to keep her from struggling. "I'm quite content right here," he bent down and licked around her mouth, kissing both of her eyes lightly. "Could stay here forever," he nuzzled the side of her neck, licking around the back of her earlobe, hearing her gasp. "You don't want me to stop, do you?"
"Sand..." she struggled against his grasp, but he was too strong, she couldn't move. "Sand gets in bad places."
"Oh?" Nick sat up, still holding her arms down. He pushed his hips into hers, grinning down at her. He bent down to lick her lips, his tongue flicking in and out of her mouth.
Chris could feel how excited he was through her dress, and froze as a wave of panic went through her. His tongue pushing up against her mouth...tasting his saliva, her eyes went wide with fear. "No," her terror apparent in her voice, and Nick let her go in surprise. She sat up quickly, burying her head in her hands to hide the tears that came to her eyes.
"Oh god, what'd I do?" Nick scrambled to her, eyes wide. He reached out to her, staring at her when she pulled away. "Chrissy?"
She just stared at the sand, shaking, repeating to herself that this was Nick. Not the idiot who attacked her. This was Nick. Her Nicky. She loved Nick, he loved her. He would never, ever hurt her, she knew that. Just...feeling him like that, his tongue...the similarities were too much to bear. She pushed her hand into her mouth as another sob threatened to shake her, and turned her face away from him.
"Please, baby, talk to me," He touched her hair gently, desperate to know what he'd done wrong. "What happened?"
"Nothing," Chris mumbled. Standing up, she wiped off her eyes and picked up her sandals. "We should get back. It's a long walk."
"No," Nick grabbed her, not letting go when she fought against him. "Chris, we only have one more day together here. I will not let us spend it with anything between us. You've been hiding yourself from me for far too long, please, let me in."
Chris sat back down, hard, and buried her head in her hands again as tears threatened to spill from her eyes. Why was it she was so scared to tell Nick what she was feeling? She normally told him EVERYTHING. What was wrong with her?
Nick sat down next to her and put his arms around her, pulling her close. "Baby, talk to me. What are you thinking? What happened?"
"I'm scared." Chris said softly, snuggling against him as his arms tightened around her.
"What are you scared of?"
"Everything." She blinked quickly, determined not to cry. "I'm feeling all this stuff I've never felt before, feeling happier than I think I've ever felt in my life, and then in the middle of all of it, there was this asshole who tried to take that from me. And he's still there, this shadow hanging over everything."
"He's not here now," Nick murmured into her hair, his hands rubbing her back consolingly.
"He is." Chris sighed. "That's what happened before. When I felt you...it was like..."
Nick gasped as he realized what she was saying, and turned her face to his. "Chris, I would never force you..."
"I know," she looked away from his eyes, she couldn't look at them right now. "I don't know why I keep feeling this way."
"Chrissy," Nick put his arms around her, encouraged when she didn't pull away. "It's going to take a while to get over what happened to you."
"I just want to put it behind me," she whispered, looking out at the ocean. "Forget it ever happened."
"I know, baby," he kissed her lightly, lips closed. "Let me help you forget."
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