~~**~~
JC and Lance were sitting on the couch waiting for Freddi when she got back from the meeting. "Well if it isn't the return of the teenage dread" she muttered as she flopped down between them. "I am beat, Johnny sure can talk, Marta had to nudge me a couple of times to make sure I wasn't sleeping"
Freddi laid her head on Lance's shoulder and rested her feet in JC's lap.
"Freddi would you ever date a younger guy" JC blurted out.
Her eyes remained closed "It depends, are we talking illegal young or almost a man young" she teased.
"We are talking about legal but very mature young"
"Let me make this easy for you, tell Joey that dating him would be like dating Nick Carter, I would spend more time babysitting and going to clubs then actually talking and carrying on a relationship"
Lance and JC looked at her confused "JOEY?"
"You guys didn't think I was that dumb did you..I may be blonde from the roots in but I can put two and two together. The way he licks his lips when he sees me, the party that takes place in his pants whenever I walk towards him, it was easy to figure out that the Italian pony has a crush on me, now excuse me but the tub and I have a rendezvous" Freddi flicked her hair over her shoulder and turned back to the boys "Do me a favour and let him down gently"
They watched her walk away and then spoke "Where the hell did that all come from...Joey?" Lance muttered. "Joey...where the hell did she ever get that idea?"
~~**~~
Justin was tired of listening to Chris sweet talking Dani on the phone so he threw aside the remote and decided to go bug JC and Lance. He was walking down the hall when he ran into Freddi. "Oooof. Sorry Freddi" Justin mumbled.
"No I am, I was off in my own dream world" Freddi mumbled "I guess I had the date with my bubbles on my mind"
"Is that your pet name for Howie?" Justin asked sarcastically.
Freddi felt the anger creep into throat and without thinking she pushed Justin up against her door "Look, bubba, I am not seeing Howie, we are friends...F..R...I...E...N..D...S... did that spell it out clearly enough, though I am sure you wouldn*t know about having friends, jesus if you jump to conclusions like you do with me, its a wonder that the guys havent thrown your ass out to the teenies." Freddi was shaking as she yelled "Now that the Howie topic is settled excuse me while I go and take a bath...maybe I will get some peace and quiet from the bar of soap" Freddi opened her door and walked inside "Tell me Justin, why are you so damn interested in who I am dating...have I ever once asked you if the rumors between you and the silicone sweetie are true?" and slammed her door shut.
"Brilliant job Brainiac" Justin cursed himself, he needed some strong coffee and a quiet place to think so he walked down to the hotel restaurant and settled into the booth at the back of the restaurant.
~~**~~
Freddi reached for the towel and started to dry off. She had just spent the last 45 minutes letting the hot water pelt down on her as she tried to find a reason for her sudden outburst on Justin. It wasn't like her to lose control like she had and she wanted desperately to relive that 10 minutes again.
She walked out into her room and looked at the clock, it was past midnight and she knew that she wouldn't be able to sleep without clearing her head.
She caught a glimpse of the brochure advertising the restaurant in the hotel lobby and decided to grab a herbal tea and a bagel while she tried to calm down.
~~**~~
Justin looked up as she walked into the restaurant. "Shit" he mumbled as she walked towards him.
"Curly" Freddi stood in front of him wearing an apologetic expression "I am sorry for my outburst" and she started to walk away.
"Freddi....wait" Justin stood up and grabbed the table tightly "Apology accepted...There was no need to apologize but thank you." Freddi smiled and continued walking.
"You are down here now, why don't you join me for a late night cup of coffee"
"Coffee will stunt your growth JUJU" Freddi grinned and slipped into the booth across from him. "So tell me something, why the hell is everyone so interested in whether or not Howie and I are dating."
Justin lowered his head and took a breath "I guess we were just concerned that if you were dating him that your mind would be on him and not us" he lied.
Freddi looked at the young man and reached across the table for his hand
"Curly, I would never forget about you."
~~**~~
"Freddi tell me about your life, I mean tell me about yourself, you know pre NSYNC" Justin and Freddi had spent the last 2 hours talking about everything but the topic that was weighing heavily on their minds.
"Why?" Freddi asked surprised by the request. They had been joking about the day in the record store, when suddenly Justin had gotten serious and asked her.
"Freddi I want to know more about you, I mean.....well I know who you are when you are with us, but what are you like in your free time, when you aren't with us"
Freddi laughed "Justin I am an ordinary 24 year old, I like going clubbing, playing pool, rollerblading."
"I know all that I want to know something that no one knows"
"Well you and I have shared the same bed so you know I talk in my sleep." Freddi laughed "I love sappy chick flicks, nothing calms and relaxes me more then to climb into my fluffy flannel pjs, dive under my duvet and curl up with a good book. I like herbal tea, I can't fall asleep until I have kissed my Curious George doll and I am a fanatic about orange sherbert and sweet tarts."
"Curious George?" Justin teased.
"Hey don't make fun of my monkey, my dad's best friend brought it to the hospital when I was a day old and it has been with me ever since, so tell me JR did I satisfy your curiosity?"
"NO you have only succeeded in making want to know you inside and out, I want to know what it feels like to have you in my arms, I want to see you smile when I kiss you, god I want to know what it feels like to make love to you and hear you whisper my name as we get lost in each other's passion" Justin thought to himself "Since it is 3 am and I am tired, I guess it will do for now" Justin grinned and held out his hand to help her up. "Will you allow me to escort you to your room?" He faked a british accent and held out his arm.
"Sir I would be delighted"
~~**~~
"Thanks for walking me back to my room, though I doubt there would be any strangers lurking in the hallway ready to jump my bones" Freddi teased as they stood in front of her door.
"Hey Joey is right down the hall, you can never be too careful" Justin smiled and before thinking his next action through his lips were on her cheek and his fingertips rested in her hair. "Good Night Fredderikka"
"Good night Justin" Freddi opened the door and stood watching as Justin walked down the hall.
"DID YOU SEE THAT? Curly Man made a move!!" Joey said excitedly and high fived Lance. The two of them had heard the couple walk past their door and were now straining to see the interaction between the two, from the crack in their door.
"Goodnight JOSEPH, GOODNIGHT LANSTEN" Justin screamed down the hall as the sounds of laughter filled the air.
~~**~~
"Can you believe that tonight's the last show of this tour?" Lance looked up from the magazine he was flipping through as he got his hair done and smiled at his bandmate.
"It went so fast, I can't believe that this time tomorrow I will be in my own bed." Justin said with a tinge of sadness in his voice.
"For someone who wasn't happy about going out on tour you sure are sad to be leaving it"
"I guess it's because I like what we have right now, I mean I am with my best friends, performing every night and well"
Lance finished his friend's thought "and you can be with Freddi."
"Yes, once we are back in Orlando she will go back to hanging out with Howie and the other guys and forget about us"
"We told you that you should have told her how you felt, god Justin you two are closer then ever."
It was true, since that late night talk in the hotel restaurant when she confessed so much of herself to Justin, the two had been inseparablee. Neither had confessed their feelings to one another much to the frustration of the rest of the band.
"I don't want to run her out of my life, shit Lance she is so afraid of commitment, of falling in love. Her ex really jaded her and I don't want to risk not having her in my life."
"But Justin you are making yourself miserable, I see the way you fight with yourself not to reach out and touch her face when she talks, the way your hand retracts as it reaches to brush the curl that always falls in her face" Lance touched his friend's arm "Curly you are playing a dangerous game with your heart. Who knows, she could walk out the door tomorrow and fall in love with some guy off the street and you will be left to wonder what if? Tell her"
~~**~~
Everyone was in a celebatory mood, the final show was complete and they were heading home, though not until the end of the tour party was thrown. They had rented out a popular Toronto night club for their party and the guys were ready to tear the place up.
"You all look so handsome, wow Chris you actually look like a gentleman" Freddi teased as she met them out in the hallway, the plan was they would all head over together.
"Thanks Momma, you look hot tonight too, why if D wasn't here...oh hi honey"
Chris grinned at his girlfriend and kissed her.
~~**~~
Justin watched as Freddi made her rounds, talking to the executives, the band and then smiled and accepted Joey's hand as he asked her to dance. She looked beyond the most beautiful woman Justin had ever seen. Her long red hair was loose, swinging dangerously as she walked, the short, wraparound dress fit her like a second skin and left little to the imagination in the chest area. The high chunky black shoes elongated her legs and showed off her toned calves. Her accessories were minimum but Justin's favourite accessory was her smile, it shone brighter then it ever had and wider then it had all tour. Justin felt a stirring in his stomach as he watched Joey and Freddi heat up the dance floor as they danced to Lucy Pearls' Dance Party Tonight. Her hips moved freely and her hands ran through her curls as she danced.
As Justin watched her he knew that he had to tell her tonight. He had to tell her that she had stolen his heart.
~~**~~
"Thanks for the dance Red, hell I haven't sweat this much since I hooked up with that stripper in LA" Joey grinned and kissed her cheek.
"YUCK....some women would line up to have you sweat on them but honey I am not one of them" Freddi slapped Joey's arm and grinned. Freddi walked to the bar and ordered a Long Beach Ice tea.
"You know I always pictured a girl like you drinking a blue or purple pretty drink with an umbrella" Justin whispered as he stood beside her.
"I hate fifi drinks, take this for example, a normal prissy girl would die before she drank something this strong but me...hell I love it" Freddi tipped her glass at Justin and smiled.
"What exactly is Miss I Can Handle My Liquer drinking?"
"Tequila, vodka, rum, triple sec and cranberry juice"
"Jesus Freddi, that could kill someone of your size"
"I am here to celebrate little man, now did you tear yourself away from the Britney look a like to question me on my drinking ability or to borrow a condom from me. She is cute you know" Freddi teased.
"Neither, actually I wanted to know if you would like to dance, all this time on tour with me and we have never heated up the dance floor" Justin held out his hand and winked at her. He smiled when her soft hand found it's way into his and he led her out onto the crowded dance floor.
"Aww, damn, just my luck we finally get to dance and it is a slow song," Freddi pretended to be bummed "Well Curly I guess I have to be content with brushing up against you and resting my head on your shoulder"
Justin grinned and pulled her in close to his chest, as the music permeated through the crowd the smell of vanilla filled his senses, her hair so soft and shiny seemed to gleam under the spotlights. He rested his hands on the small of her back and he smiled when her hand ran up his spine and settled into the nape of his neck.
"What the hell are you doing Freddi?" she asked herself "This is Justin you are getting cozy with" She pushed the doubts out of her mind and concentrated on how right it felt to feel his breath on her bare shoulders, how wonderful it felt to have his hands massaging her back. Justin's lips brushed over her ear and a soft moan escaped from her lips. The music ended and they pulled apart, both starting at each other, waiting for the other to make the next move. "Freddi, I need to tell you something" Justin's voice was strained as he looked into her eyes. He led her through the crowd, guiding her with his hands on her hips and out onto the patio.
Freddi shivered and walked towards the railing, clenching the cold steel railing between her hands and looking out onto the night life below. She smiled when she felt Justin's chest brush up against her back and melted when his hands wrapped around her waist. "Freddi, I have been waiting to tell you this since our first midnight talk on the bus" Justin leaned down and whispered his confession into her ear, letting his breath linger on her ears and neck. He waited, letting his confession sink in "Say something Freddi" he pleaded.
Freddi licked her lips and turned to face him, standing on her tiptoes she placed one hand on his waist to steady herself and the other one found its way into his curls and pulled his face down gently to meet hers and when her lips met his for the first time she knew nothing had ever felt that right. Their kisses became more passionate and as Justin's tongue started to force open her lips she stopped. Her hands broke free of his curls and her lips formed a look of regret.
"Justin I am sorry, god I am sorry...I can't do this...it isn't fair to you" and she turned and walked hastily back into the club, leaving Justin to slam his hands down on the steel rail and his eyes filling with tears.
"Dammit Freddi you can't do this, you can't deny me...I felt the passion, the desire and the need in your kisses. This is one time you are not going to fool yourself" Justin muttered to himself as he watched her run through the crowd and out of the club. "You will come back to me, your heart will lead you back to me and when it does I will be waiting"
~~**~~
Lance was dancing with one of their makeup artists when he saw Freddi run through the crowd and out of the club. He was about to follow her out when he saw a flustered Justin walk back into the club, grinning.
"So it's now safe to say I am confused..Freddi runs out of here looking upset and you walk in smiling like Busta when he eats Chris's dinner. What the hell?" Lance asked Justin.
"She's mine, she might not know it yet but her eyes and her kisses told me all I need to know. It may take me a while to break her down but her heart is going to be mine." Justin punched fists with Lance "That*s a fact PooFu, now if anyone is looking for me I have some business back at the hotel to tend to"
"Remind me never to underestimate the power of what an afro and whining can do" Lance teased as Justin walked away.
~~**~~
Freddi stood out on the balcony, dressed only in a tank slip, her wild hair dancing in the wind. She had been standing there for the past 30 minutes trying to figure out why she had run from Justin. For the past 2 months she had fought her feelings for him and now that he had told her how he felt, she ran.
"You might want to put a jacket or something on, I don*t think you want to spend the first week back at home in the hospital being treated for pneumonia." JC's voice brought back to the present. She had forgotten that his room was right beside hers.
"Hi JC...I guess I got caught up in my thoughts and forgot how cold it was. Excuse me for a moment" Freddi wrapped the comforter off of her bed around her and walked back out onto the patio. "So how come you left the party so early?"
"I saw you leave and thought you might need someone to talk to"
"That was sweet but you should be back celebrating, you all worked hard and you deserve this night. I am just tired, anxious to get home and run down. Don't let an old fogey like me ruin your fun"
"Old fogey? Red you are 24, give me a break. Besides I know what is really bothering you, it begins with a J and ends with e."
"An E?" Freddi asked, bewildered by JC's comment.
"Justin's confession of love"
"OH" Freddi hung her head.
"He really does love you, Freddi I have never seen him act the way he does when he is with you"
"It is just so hard JC, I work for him, I am 6 years older then him and I am afraid of him, scared to death of him really"
JC walked over to the edge of his railing and held his hand out to Freddi. "Red you don't need to be afraid of Justin, he doesn't have it in his heart to hurt anyone."
"Maybe not intentionally, god JC I can't risk it, my life is exactly where I want it, I am 24 almost 25 and have a wonderful job that most people only dream about, the greatest friends and the love of one of the most sweetest men I know."
"Where's the problem?" JC asked quietly.
"He is the problem.....He is one of the most popular and lusted after men in the world, he is around beautiful women all the time and near fans who will throw themselves at him whenever he turns around. JC I am a plain girl, more comfortable in jeans and birkenstocks, I am not a huge fan of clubbing, I am more comfortable going to a sporting event or getting sweaty while I hit the golf course or play basketball."
"He loves basketball" JC Interjected.
"I hate the spotlight, hate wearing makeup and hate getting dressed up. JC all I want is to have someone who will curl up with me while we talk about our day, stroke my hair as I tell him my hopes and dreams and most of all I want a man who wants to eat ice cream from the carton while we lie in bed, surrounded by comfy pillows and candles and watch reruns of cheesy comedies."
"Freddi he will do all that"
"Maybe, but JC he will get tired of it, he will want to be out with people his own age, people who want to get smashed and throw up as they dance in the crowded clubs, he will want someone who will dress up like a superstar and hold his hand and pose for the cameras while they walk into a movie premier. I am not that person, never have been and never will."
"Freddi you can't give up on this one chance at love just because you think you are too different."
"I have to JC, it is not fair to Justin and not fair to me. Maybe in our dreams we would work well together but in real life we are a wrong match. If only life could represent our dreams...our love is perfect....if only in our dreams." Freddi squeezed his hand and walked into her hotel suite, shutting the door behind her.
JC walked back into the hotel room and stopped when he saw Justin, crouched on the floor crying. He bent down and touched his friend's face. "How long have you been here J?"
"Long enough to know what I have to do to win her love. This time I am going to prove that her life will be better then her dreams." Justin wiped the tears from his eyes and climbed into bed.
~~**~~
"Red it's Lance, we are all going out, Joey and Justin have some kind of sick plan, all I know is that you are supposed to dress casual and that I have been instructed not to show up at Justin's without a certain red head in tow. I will pick you up at 7, and I am not taking no for an answer"
Freddi listened to her answering machine's message and groaned. She had managed to avoid seeing the boys since they had returned home last week. She was totally uncomfortable, especially around Justin and she had been hiding out at the Dorough's and at AJ's. Nick and the rest of the guys had teased her miserably when they found out about Justin's confession, saying that she was selling out to the dark side, sleeping with the enemy and so forth but Brian and his fiancee had been a wonderful support system for her as well. Brian had sat her down and told her that he and Leighanne had numerous conversations about the age factor but that they had come to the conclusion that as long as they loved each other that was all that mattered. It helped but not enough to make Freddi strong enough to face her true feelings towards Justin. Not yet anyway.
She looked at her watch and groaned "30 minutes before the mouse brigade takes over my house, I guess I had better go get ready." Freddi grabbed her robe and walked towards her bathroom.
*******
"Don't take this the wrong way Freddi but you look like hell, what the hell have you been doing? Lance asked as they drove to Justin's.
"Catching up on my sleep, unpacking"
"Hiding from Curly" JC answered. "Sorry but it had to be said"
"I am not hiding from Justin, I just needed some time away to clear my mind"
"Is it cleared?" Lance and JC asked at the same time.
"Jesus talk about In synch" Freddi grinned as they rolled their eyes. Her heart would not stop beating fast at the thought of seeing Justin.
~~**~~
"Once again the curly wonder is late" Chris muttered as he and Dani sat on the couch arguing over what movie they wanted to see the next day.
Freddi sat on the edge of the loveseat, strumming her painted nails on her bare thigh and picking at an imaginary piece of lint on her shirt.
"I don*t know what song you are strumming but it sounds good" his wonderful, smooth voice filled her ears and as if time stood still their eyes met and in spite of herself she smiled widely and jumped up to hug him.
"Good to see you too Red" Justin held her tight and smiled when the familiar scent of vanilla wafted to his nose. "You look like shit, you and me have a date with the beach tomorrow" Justin held her at arm's length and scolded her. "You are far too fine to look that white and pasty"
"Gee thanks, I knew there was something I missed....ah yes your wonderfully romantic personality and your beautiful comments, you smooth talker you" she slapped his shoulder and smiled. "now tell me, where are we going?"
"That's for Joey and I to know and the rest of you to piss and moan about till we get there" Justin grinned and held out his hand "Shall we madame, your chariot awaits"
"Not if you are the chauffeur...Hey Lanceman, how about rescuing this damsel in distress, can I get a lift with you?"
"I didn't picture you to be a damsel in distress Red" JC teased.
"If this wannabe Jacques Villeneuve is driving I will kiss a monkey's ass, eat the arse hole out of skunk or pretend I am damsel in distress, as long as I don't have to risk my life with this wild driver I would do just about anything"
"Aww like putty in my hands...hey little girl wanna take a ride in my love machine?" Joey patted his lap and grinned.
The group burst out laughing as Freddi took Joey's hand and walked out, turning back to face Justin she grinned "Curly there are lots of things I like fast but your driving is not one of them." she wiggled her eyebrows and stuck out her tongue.
Justin clasped his hands over his chest "Oooh baby that's the best offer I have had in weeks, that tongue"
"All the better to lick you with little man"
~~**~~
"This was your plan? CityWalk?" Freddi asked as Joey pulled into the parking lot.
"Hey this place rocks." Joey started to get out of the car and stopped
"Freddi"
"Yes?"
"The way you acted back there, at the house, the flirting and stuff, if you aren't interested in Justin it could be really confusing for him"
"We are friends, I tease you all like that" Freddi smiled "Truthfully, I had all intentions to ignore him but I couldn't. The minute I saw him my heart fluttered, my knees knocked and all i could think about was hugging him and smelling him"
"Jeez if you get that excited about seeing him, imagine how excited and apeshit you are going to get if you end up slapping bellies"
"WHAT!!"
"Slapping bellies, banging boots, making sweet sweat, let him take a walk in your whiskers, riding the baloney pony and my favourite, letting his purple headed yogurt slinger slither in your coarse forest"
Freddi could hardly breath as she tried to scold Joey. "Jesus I give up, you really are a pig you know that?"
"OINK OINK and damn proud of it Momma, now come Mrs. Robinson let's go meet the rest of the them."
~~**~~
"They are giving out mardi gras beads at Pat O'Brien's" Chris said as he saw the crowd of people in the street waving their hands and begging the people on the balcony to toss them beads.
"Freakin amateurs" Freddi muttered as she downed her Long Beach Ice Tea.
"Stand back and watch the master" Freddi walked into the middle of the crowd and pulled at her low cut shirt and winked at the men upstairs.
"Holy shit look at the beads they are throwing at her" Justin exclaimed as he watched the beads shower down on her.
"It's all about the girls" Freddi patted her breasts and handed out the huge cache of beads she had received. "god didn't just put them there for decoration, he gave them to us to get what we want" Freddi winked at Justin and walked towards the Motown Cafe.
~~**~~
"Oh shit make her stop, for the love of Christina's tacky ass blue eyeshadow please make her stop" Chris wailed and held his ears as Freddi massacred Stop in The Name of Love up on stage.
"Whose idea was it to come to karaoke before we got smashed" JC muttered.
"Come on now, she isn't that bad" Justin muttered as he pushed the rolled up pieces of napkin further into his ears.
~~**~~
"Watch this, any bet he gets up there and sings some pimpin song" Joey bet Chris as Justin took the mic.
"This is for the music on my mind, the chorus in my heart" Justin smiled at
Freddi and raised his glass.
Mesmerizing points of view
Hypnotic conversations
Contemplative mood swings
Drew me to you
It never mattered when or where
Who you'd been with
The colour of your hair
Baby I have always cared
But you couldn't see
Inside of me
You didn't notice my intentions
Nothing but dreams
Is that I carry with me
Cynical attitudes
The center of attention
I wonder if you understood
You could have changed my life
Focusing my energy
setting expectations
trying to convince myself
she loves me
A little look here
A little smile there
Moments and memories we've shared
roses and things
silly it seems
is all that carry
dreams that I carry with me
I never knew
What to do
To make you
to believe
in my dreams
my silly dreams
We had no chance
never made plans
so many things slipped through our hands
Don't wanna look back
Too late to look back
I gotta get her off of my mind
I got no more pleas
It's over for me
A dream's all I carry
A dream that I carry
Dreams that I carry
(Jon Secada....Dreams that I Carry)
Freddi's eyes filled with tears as she listened to Justin pour all his emotions into the song and she knew he was begging her not to give up on the dream of love they both had. She waited until he finished the song and as he sat down she picked up his hand and directed his fingertips to her throat. "Can you feel it, that beating heart is for you" and as their lips met in their first kiss of honesty, they knew that they had finally found the portal where their dreams merged into reality.
The End....for this story....What happens to Justin and Freddi once they
start a relationship, how do they deal with the fans, their new lives
together...and what happens when they find out who their on line confidante
really is...humor and tears abound the next story in this series is....
Hold On (coming soon)
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