Ashley sighed and fell back against the carpet. She hadn’t finished all of her wrapping the night before because she had gotten so caught up in a Christmas movie that was on TV and she fell asleep watching it. Her punishment was now taking place at one thirty in the morning on Christmas Eve. Nick, who was spending the night with her and Bradley, was the one who finally coaxed Ashley’s little brother into going to bed around eleven. Nick had also said he would help her wrap. It turned out that Nick could not wrap presents and after he had successfully used up a roll of wrapping paper and a roll of tape on two presents, Ashley had demoted him to handing her tape.
The one thing that Nick had turned out to be able to do besides tear tape was assemble the bike that Ashley’s parents had gotten Bradley for Christmas. As much money as the Kellys had paid for the bike, Nick would have figured that it came assembled. It hadn’t and now he was standing it up in front of the Christmas tree after finally putting it together. He went over and stoked the fire that was blazing in Ashley’s fireplace and turned up the Christmas music that was playing softly on the stereo system. He then made his way over to where Ashley was now picking up all of the trash from wrapping presents.
Nick lowered himself to the floor behind Ashley and began to gently massage her shoulders. He felt her recoil first at his touch, but he continued anyways and soon enough she melted into his hands.
A few minutes later Ashley sighed softly and leaned back against him, stopping the motions of his hands, “I needed that.”
“You’ve been in the floor for three hours wrapping presents so I figured you would,” Nick’s breath tickled the skin next to her ear.
Ashley turned around to face him, bringing an end to their physical contact, “Let’s exchange presents right now, Nick, okay?”
“You don’t want to wait until in the morning?” Nick asked.
“We need to save as much time as we can in the morning so we can make our flight. It’ll be better if we get this out of the way right now,” she looked up at him, “Please?”
“All right. Let me go get your present,” Nick gave in and stood from the floor. He held out his hand to help her up.
A couple of minutes later they were seated in front of the Christmas tree again, sitting Indian style, and facing each other.
Nick handed her one of his presents, “You go first.”
Ashley tore into the red and green wrapping paper to reveal a CD case with a picture of her and Nick on the cover. She looked up at him, puzzled.
“Open it up,” Nick urged.
Ashley opened the cover and inside was a CD. She read the writing on it aloud, a smile forming on her face, “’Ashley’s Favorite Songs Sung by Nick. Merry Christmas.’ When did you do this?”
“While we were in Switzerland. Brian and I were fooling around in the studio one day and I thought it might be fun. It’s nothing spectacular, but I know you love all of those songs,” Nick turned the CD case over and pointed to the track listings on the back.
“Thank you, Nick,” Ashley handed him a package, “You open one now.”
Nick ripped the wrapping paper away to reveal a brown cardboard box. He opened it up to find at least ten smaller packages, all of the same size, packed in Styrofoam peanuts. Now it was Nick’s turn to look quizzical..
“Open it up,” Ashley used Nick’s own words.
Nick began to open the smaller packages, his eyes lighting up more and more with each one. “Where the heck did you find these?” Nick held up one of the presents. It was an impossible-to-find video game from the first Nintendo, still in its original packing and there were at least nine more besides that one. Nick had begun to collect the old Nintendo games just as the band had released Millennium and there were several that he hadn’t been able to locate. Ashley had found all of the ones that his collection was missing.
“I have my ways,” Ashley shrugged and smiled, handing Nick another present.
Nick ripped away the wrapping paper to discover a leather bound photo album. Engraved in the bottom right hand corner was: To Nicky. Merry Christmas. May we make many more memories like these. Love, Brown Eyes. Nick took his time flipping through the pages of the scrapbook that she had obviously spent so much time creating. Pictures of them from the time they were small children until just recently leapt out from the pages. Ashley’s delicate handwriting chronicled the milestones in their friendship and each was brought to life again in the pages of the photo album. He looked up to meet her expectant eyes when he was finished, “Thank you. You don’t know how much this means to me.”
“It’s probably not what you were expecting, but I had all of these pictures and I thought I should do something with them, so here they are,” she ran her hand along the book that she had spent so many hours with, “for when you get lonely on the road.”
“I won’t get another present that I love this much,” Nick said earnestly. He meant it. She hadn’t left anything out. Every memory that had ever been caught on film was in that book. Nick knew that the nights when he was on tour, when the loneliness became so paralyzing Nick could barely breath, that he would take out this book and relive these moments. He knew that he would be reliving them alone, always alone, and that this present that she had given him would become all the more priceless after Ashley made her home with Preston.
Nick pushed the thoughts out of his mind and sat the scrapbook beside him. He handed Ashley two more presents- the bracelet and the music box. She first opened the music box, her eyes lighting up as she’d lifted the antique cherry lid to hear the melodic strains of Canon in D flow from it. She reached for the second present and Nick held his breath as she opened the velvet jewelry box.
She gasped softly when she saw the bracelet and whispered, “Nicky, it’s beautiful.”
Nick looked down shyly, “I’m sorry it’s not twenty five carats worth of diamonds. I bought it in Italy when I found the music box and I just thought that it looked like you. We can get something else if you want.”
“No, Nick. Don’t ever apologize. This is so beautiful. The last thing that I wanted was twenty-five carats of diamonds. There wasn’t any thought put into that present. You bought this with me in mind,” Ashley gently took it out of the jewelry box, “Help me put it on.”
Nick reached out and took the bracelet from her. His fingers fumbled with the delicate clasp for a few moments, but he got a hold on it and secured it around her wrist, “There you go.” He brought his lips down and softly kissed her pulse point beneath the bracelet.
Ashley’s breath caught in her throat at the intimate contact of Nick’s lips with her skin. Nick looked up and their gazes locked. Once again, as he had done the other week while they’d lain in his bed, Nick placed his hand at the back of her head and moved closer to her.
“Nick.”
Ashley’s voice was barely audible, but her breath was sweet against his skin. It was the only invitation Nick needed. He took her lips beneath his own, savoring the sweetness of her mouth, as he captured her breath and returned it to her, mingled with his own. His other hand found it’s way to the small of her back as he lowered her to the floor in front of the Christmas tree. The heat from the flames was nothing compared to what was being emitted between their bodies as Ashley strained closer to him, feeling the completeness that only Nick could make her feel.
Nick felt one of Ashley’s hands slip underneath his shirt to touch his bare back and her other hand play softly with the waist band of his flannel pajama pants. Ashley heard none of the warning bells that had gone off in her head the last time this had happened. Nick took over all of her senses and she could focus on nothing but him and the soft trail that his lips were leaving on her skin. Nick took his lips off the base of her throat and brought them back up to her mouth, letting his tongue dance with hers.
A few minutes later they reluctantly pulled away, their gazes locking with each other as they tried to catch their breath. They both silently acknowledged the fact that if they didn’t stop now, they might not stop at all.
Nick averted his eyes as he took in her flushed cheeks and her lips, swollen from his kisses. He outlined them gently with his fingers, “This feels so right.”
Ashley raised her head and gave him another soft kiss. She fell back against the carpet and sighed, running her hands over his chest, “Why is this happening?”
“Because it’s meant to be. Because we’re right together.”
“Are we, Nick? Don’t you think things would be different if we were supposed to be together?”
“I don’t know. I can’t answer that. All I know is that I’ve fallen in love with you,” Nick confessed, his voice husky with emotion.
“Don’t say that.”
“It’s true. I’ve never been surer of anything in my life. I love you,”
Nick brushed his lips against hers, “I’ll always love you.”
The tears that had been threatening finally spilled down Ashley’s cheeks as she pushed Nick off of her and sat up.
“Brown Eyes?” Nick questioned gently.
She turned to face him. “I was always so afraid of love, Nick. I was afraid that I would never find it and that if I did I’d lose it because I wouldn’t know what it was,” Ashley picked at the carpet, not meeting his gaze, “I know what love is now. It’s the strongest emotion I’ve ever felt and it scares me even more than not knowing what it was. I don’t want that feeling, Nick. I don’t want that responsibility. It comes along with too much hurt and obligation and I won’t do that to you, Nick, I won’t. I won’t put my hope in someone else and I won’t let someone else put their hope in me.”
“Don’t you know that it hurts me more to hear you say that you won’t let yourself love me, that you won’t take the risk? I would rather a little time of love with you than a lifetime of regret. Can’t you see that?” Nick reached out and took her small hand in his large one, “Live for right now. Not for tomorrow, not for May 13th. Right now.”
As her tears increased Ashley allowed herself to be pulled into his arms,
arms that had held her more times than she could count. When her sobs
somewhat subsided she pulled back slightly from Nick’s embrace. She tilted
her head up and right before her lips touched his in a tender kiss, she
whispered, “It’s too late, Nicky. Too late.”
Links to other sites on the Web