Scene 9
A while later, we see them in the bath. They’re front to back, with Spike against the back of the tub. He’s running his hands over her shoulders and down her arms. They look very relaxed, though Miranda's broken leg is still in the cast and so sticks out of the water.
Miranda: “We’ll need to get Buffy on our side. If we can convince her, then she’ll take care of Angel.”
Spike: “So do you really think I was wearing her down?” [She playfully splashes him.]
Miranda: “How could she possibly continue to resist?”
Spike: “No need for such sarcasm, love.”
Miranda: [more serious] “She’ll try to bait you. She’ll do everything in her power to get you to throw the first punch. That’s all she’ll need.”
Spike: “Think I’m going to need a new and more distracting chant to make it through that. She does have a way of infuriating me.”
Miranda: “We’ll likely have to leave town, regardless. I’ll make some calls.”
Spike: “She can’t force us out.”
Miranda: “She’s the slayer, love. It’s her town.”
Suddenly, something passes in front of the door of the bathroom.
Miranda: “Was that a cat?”
Spike: “What?”
Miranda: “I think I saw a cat pass by the door.”
Then a person scoots by the door, saying “sorry”.
Miranda: “Dawn?”
In a moment, Dawn appears in the doorway to the bathroom—she’s wearing pajamas and has her hand over her eyes.
Dawn: “Sorry. I didn’t know you were back. [in a cheery voice] Yay, you’re back.”
Miranda: “You don’t have to cover your eyes, dear, we’ve got bubbles. What are you doing here?”
Dawn: [Pulling her hand from her eyes, but still looking terribly embarrassed.] “Keeping Cat company.”
Miranda: [to Spike] “I told you I saw a cat.”
Dawn: “What happened to your leg?”
Miranda: “It’s a long story.”
Spike: “She fought Lucifer”
Dawn: “Wow. Cool.”
Miranda: “Let’s go back to why you’re here. Isn’t it the middle of the night?”
Spike: “Early morning, more like.”
Dawn: [fast, nervous voice] “See, I thought you’d only be in L.A. a few days and so I figured I’d surprise you by having Cat here and settled by the time you got back. He was still recovering from being “tudored” [she makes the quote signs] when you were here before. So I brought him over with his things right after you left. Then I stopped by once a day to make sure he had food and stuff. But then you didn’t come back so soon and I started to feel guilty about him being all alone and everything in this big house, which I thought might be a little creepy for a cat all by himself, so I decided to spend the night with him. I told Buffy I was sleeping at Janice’s because she probably wouldn’t like me sleeping here all by myself, even though I’m totally fine about it, but you know how she is and I would have asked her to stay here with me, but Cat doesn’t really get along with her all that well. So anyway, I was sleeping upstairs when Cat started scratching at one of the closet doors in the room I was in—it kinda freaked me out, so I opened it to see why he was so interested and I saw there was a staircase in the back. Before I could stop him, he bolted down the stairs and I followed him and here I am. So are there, like, secret passages all over this place?”
Miranda: [confused] “Who is this ‘Cat’?”
Dawn: “Oh, I named him after the cat in Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Spike got him for you when he was just a kitten.”
Spike: “Dawn, I thought we’d already talked about this. He’s yours now.”
Dawn: [teenager girlie whine] “No, but it’s romantic.”
Miranda: [turning to look at Spike] “You got me a kitten?”
Spike: “I got a kitten to help me sleep—it just so happens that the one I found fit the description of the kind you wanted.”
Dawn: [excited] “Let me get him.” [she trots off]
Miranda: “I can’t believe you got me a kitten.”
Spike: “He’s a bloody cat now. And he’s kind of clingy if you ask me.”
Dawn returns with the cat in her arms. She plops him down in the bathroom. The cat sees Spike and chirps a greeting.
Spike: “Yeah, yeah.”
Miranda: [surprised] “He likes you?”
Spike: “Don’t sound so surprised.”
Miranda: “I didn’t think cats and vampires got along.”
Spike: “We don’t. It’s an apparition.”
Dawn: “He’s really sweet. He plays catch. I brought over his toys.”
Miranda puts her hand out and the cat comes up and sniffs her.
Miranda: “He’s lovely. I think we can be friends. What do you say, Cat?” [It just sits and purrs at Spike.]
Dawn: “So, I can, uh, go upstairs now. Leave you two alone.” [She’s goofily excited on their behalf.]
Miranda: “No, no. Just go in the playroom a minute while we get dressed. Why don’t I make some breakfast for us?”
Spike: “You can’t even stand—how do you propose to make breakfast?”
Miranda: “I can stand—Can’t walk, really, but I can stand. I’ll just need some help up the stairs.”
They get dressed. Miranda is still pretty weak, but other than her one leg, she can move around well enough. Spike helps her up the stairs and she starts cooking breakfast with some help from Alex, who she had to coax out of hiding. Duncan and Cordelia come down at the smell of food. They look suspiciously post-coital. Duncan is thrilled to see Miranda up and about and he gives her a big hug. She whispers in his ear “You are such a slut. I love that about you.” After making some bacon and eggs, Miranda is starting to look wiped out again. She gets Alex to help her down the stairs with some breakfast for herself and Dawn (although she doesn’t mention to C&D that Dawn is downstairs). She finds Dawn and Spike playing video games in the playroom—it’s some sort of deathmatch game and Dawn is giggling because she’s winning.
Spike: “You’ve been practicing.”
Dawn: “Hardly. You just suck.”
Spike: [waving his bandaged hand, which is now mostly healed] “Hey, injury here.”
Dawn: “Tell yourself what you have to. I say you’re regressing.”
Spike: “Guess I’ve got better things to do with my hands lately. [catching himself] oh. Sorry. Inappropriate comment for a teenager.”
Dawn: “Palease. I’m not twelve.”
Miranda: [coming into the room] “Fuel for the game.”
Alex is right behind her with a tray, which he sets down and turns to leave.
Miranda: “Alex, this is Dawn. Dawn, Alex”
He gives her an awkward wave and quick smile and then disappears.
Dawn: [After he’s left. Giggling.] “He’s cute. In a mysterious-creepy-sidekick kind of way.”
Dawn and Miranda nibble on some food. Spike eats a piece of bacon.
Dawn: “So tell me about your trip.”
Miranda: “Too tired for a full account right now. In a nutshell: I fought Lucifer, found out I was an angel and Spike got tied to a chair.”
Dawn: [to the last part] “Again?”
Miranda: [beat] Oh, and we might be moving to New York.”
Dawn: [whiney] “No way. But you just got back.”
Miranda: “We’ll talk about it later. I’m going to take a little nap now. You two keep playing.”
Dawn: “Best of five?”
Spike: “You’re on.”
**
Thirty minutes later.
An amplified voice from no-where: “Petite blonde approaching the front walkway.”
Spike: [looking around, confused] “the hell?”
Dawn: “Sounds like a walky-talky.”
They glance around the room. Spike spots the contraption hidden in a plant. He pulls it out and looks at it.
Spike: “He is such a sneaky little bastard.”
Alex’s voice: “Petite blonde about to ring doorbell.”
Spike: “Yeah, we get it.”
Dawn: “You have to push the button before you speak.”
Spike: “I think he heard me.”
Dawn: “So if you move to New York, can I come stay with you guys?—maybe I could come for the summer or something.”
Miranda: [dragging herself out of bed] “S’alright with us, but I can’t imagine your sister liking the idea. [to Spike] Help me up the stairs. I’ll talk to her first. You two keep playing.”
Dawn: “ooh. Could you maybe not tell her I’m here?”
Miranda: “If she asks, why don’t I just tell her you stopped by on the way home—seeing the car out front, alright?”
Dawn: [pleased with the lie] “I love you guys. You can’t move.”
Miranda goes upstairs. She’s still weak and tired, but healing. Cordelia is already letting Buffy in by the time she makes it to the door. Cordelia is overly friendly and gives Buffy a BIG hug (she’s still feelin’ groovy). Duncan waves from the other room, where he is hungrily devouring bacon and eggs. As Buffy walks in, Miranda hobbles up to greet her.
Miranda: [mustering her most pleasant voice] “Buffy. Can I fix you some breakfast?”
Buffy: “You’re awake. I should call Angel.”
Miranda: [frowning—thinking she’s calling to tell him to come right over.] “It’s daylight—he can’t possibly make the trip here now.”
Buffy: “He’d want to know that you’re alright. He was worried sick about you.”
Miranda: “Oh. Fine. By the way, I never actually had a chance to have that little “talk” with him. You didn’t happen to mention...”
Buffy: [interrupting—annoyed] “No.”
Miranda: “Right, then. I’ll just throw on some more eggs. I invited Anya and Xander over for brunch.”
Buffy: “What? This isn’t a party.”
Miranda: “It is now.”
Buffy’s annoyed, but she takes a minute to call Angel who is still back at her house. She walks into the living room.
Buffy: [to Cordelia and Duncan] “So, is everything alright here? I wanted to check in before heading to work—I’ll be back before sundown.”
Cordelia: “Everything’s peachy. Miranda makes the best scrambled eggs.”
Buffy: [confused frown—this scene of domestic bliss is not exactly what she was expecting] “I’m sure she does.”
Buffy goes into the kitchen to talk to Miranda.
Miranda: “Are you staying for breakfast?”
Buffy: “No. I have to get going in a few minutes. Just checking in.”
Miranda: “We’re all good here. I still have to nap every hour or so, and my leg’s pretty useless, but considering everything, life is grand.”
Buffy: “Where’s Spike?”
Miranda: “Downstairs.”
Buffy: “Can I use your phone? Mine seems to be running low on power and I have to call Dawn.”
Miranda: “Oh, you can just shout if you like—she’s downstairs with Spike.”
Buffy: “What? [not a nice tone] You left her alone with him?”
Just then, there’s a squeal from the basement. Buffy bolts for the door and after crashing it open, flies down the stairs in a panic. She bursts in on Spike and Dawn on the Playstation—Spike is playfully batting at Dawn’s controls to throw her off ‘cause she’s winning again. Dawn is jokingly yelling at him to stop and giggling/squealing. The both look up when Buffy arrives.
Buffy: “Dawn, come here. Now.”
Cat hisses at her.
Dawn: “But I’m winning—it’s best of 5 and it’s 2 and 2 and I’m winning this one.”
Buffy: “Dawn. Move away from him.”
Dawn: [detecting the seriousness of Buffy’s tone] “What’s your deal? It’s just Spike.”
Buffy: [to Spike] “You didn’t tell her?”
Spike: “Wasn’t exactly the first thing that came to mind, no.”
Dawn: “Tell me what?”
Spike is just leaning back on his elbows, shaking his head.
Buffy: [to Dawn—as she stomps over to her and grabs her arm, dragging her across the room] “What are you even doing here?”
Dawn: “I saw that they were home and stopped by. Miranda made me breakfast.”
Buffy: “It’s time to go.”
Dawn: [mopey] “Someone got decaf this morning.”
Spike: “Angel’s in town—he makes everyone grouchy.”
Buffy: [to Dawn] “Spike’s chip isn’t working anymore.”
Dawn: [slight concerned frown.] “Oh. [pause while she thinks this through] So basically, he could have just had me as snack.”
Buffy: “Exactly.”
Dawn: “We’ve been playing Mortal Kombat for like, an hour straight and all he’s done is let me win.”
Spike: [disgusted] “Let’s get something straight. I would never let you win.”
Buffy: [ignoring him] “That’s not the point. Let’s go.”
She drags Dawn upstairs, eyeing Spike threateningly the whole time. He shakes his head and leans back against the couch. He mumbles something under his breath.
**
Upstairs. Buffy tells Dawn to wait in the living room while she talks to Miranda.
Buffy: [to Miranda. She’s LIVID.] “You really are insane, aren’t you? How could you possibly have left them alone? She IS my family. Are you looking for a fight? Because between you and me, you’d lose.”
Miranda: “I hope you’re kidding, though by the position of your arms, I dare say it’s unlikely. Do you honestly think he could ever hurt Dawn? I get your instinct to worry about the average citizen of this fair town and perhaps an inkling of doubt might be understandable in Xander’s case, but it is inexcusable for you to think that Spike would hurt a hair on your little sister’s head. You shouldn’t need me to tell you that.”
Buffy: “Things are different now.”
Miranda: “Not that different.”
Buffy: “He got himself a get-out-of-jail-free card, that’s all. Serial killer, remember?”
Miranda: [incredibly frustrated] “Gah! You know what Spike did while we were in Europe? He bloody well dragged me back into a very bad situation, risking serious personal injury to both himself and me, to rescue a girl who simply bore a passing resemblance to your little sister. Could have flogged him at the time. But he couldn’t let it go. Don’t you get it? He’s the same person.”
Buffy: [maybe second guessing herself] “Fine. No harm done—this time. I have to go and I’m taking Dawn with me. I’ll be back with Angel at sundown. We’ll resolve things then.”
Miranda: [sarcasm] “Will we, then? Such a relief.”
Buffy calls to Dawn, who appears reluctantly.
Dawn: “So can I spend the summer in New York with Spike and Miranda? They said it’s OK.”
Buffy: “What? No!” [Rolling her eyes and shaking her head, she and Dawn leave.]