Sometimes you may have a woman all wound up to the point where she actually volunteers her number to you. Sometimes she’ll invite you out somewhere, and occasionally she’ll kiss you without any prompting on your part. RARELY she’ll be the one to initiate sex with you. But the reality is that most women are PASSIVE and YOU, as the man, have to take the lead. YOU have to be the one to approach, to get the number, to arrange the meeting, and to make the move to kiss her or bed her. That’s just the way it is. It’s in most women’s natures to be submissive, and they want a dominant male to LEAD them through all these steps.

If you find yourself complaining that women should be the ones to approach you, to ask for your number, to jump on you and kiss you, or to start grabbing your crotch to get sex, GET OVER IT. This is the way it is in our society, and in fact in most of the animal kingdom. You’re going to HAVE to stick your neck out and risk being rejected, and you’ll just have to deal with that reality. Just like you won’t meet many women unless you go out and TRY to meet them, you won’t get a kiss or a sexual encounter with a woman unless you make an attempt to get it.

The good news is that once you’ve passed any of these steps with women, they tend to open up and initiate it a lot more themselves. They’ll come up and kiss YOU, or drop to their knees while you’re watching TV and do wicked things to you. They just want YOU to be the one to initiate these things the first time.

One important corollary of the man being forced to take the lead is to EXPECT RESISTANCE. At every step, even if a woman really likes you, she’ll put up resistance. No girl likes to feel like she’s "easy", and no matter how much she wants to give you her number, kiss you, or have sex with you she’ll throw up some barrier or objection to convince herself that she at least TRIED to resist you. This resistance is known as the ASD, or anti-slut defenses.

Contact close involves getting a woman’s contact information from her. This means either her e-mail address, her home phone number, her work phone number, her wireless phone number, or any combination thereof. Whichever of these is best is open to debate, and depends really on your preferences and on the woman.

If she’s always at work then the work number would be a surer way to reach her, but she may be too busy to talk. This can work in your favor actually, because you can talk to her just long enough to schedule a meet and then get off the phone. But if you have good phone gaming skills and want to keep her on the phone for a while, this is bad.

If she’s a heavy social type and always out of the house the wireless phone would be the best bet to reach her. The downside to this is that the sound on them is usually horrible, she’ll be either out with friends or driving when she answers, and probably very distracted. Again, bad for phone game.

E-mail is generally safe in that it’s less intrusive and a woman will give it up more easily. With a phone she doesn’t have much choice; it rings, she answers, and she’s put on the spot talking to you right then and there. But if you send her an e-mail, she can answer it at her leisure, or block you from contacting her if she decides she doesn’t really like you.

You can set up a contact close by using fluff talk which leads to it. Here are two examples:

(She’s telling you something) "I have to go now, but tell me all about it some other time! While I'm massaging your shoulders for example!" (rub one shoulder and give her a preview) "Give me your number so we can continue this later."

(Look down at your watch) "Okay, I talked to you for two minutes, AND I let you shake my hand...That'll be twenty dollars, tip not included". (response) I really have to get going, I’ll collect my money the next time we see each other." (start to walk away) "HEY! Do you have email?" (segue into contact close)

Remember the rule, "Never ASK a woman for anything". Don’t say "Can I have your number?" Instead say "What’s your number?" or use soft commands like "Give me your number." Don’t be worried about looking pushy or forward, since if a woman wants to give you her number, she’ll give it to you either way. It just sets the whole dynamic up better if you don’t "ask" for it.

Below is a pretty easy and proven way to get contact info:

"Well, it was nice meeting you. I'm going to get back to my friends/whatever." Then, just as you’re turning to walk away, and you kind of disconnect, turn back and say "HEY! Do you have email?" If she says "yes," take out a pen and paper and say "Great, write it down for me" and have her write it down. Then AS SHE'S IN THE MIDDLE OF WRITING, say "Put your number down there too." (this works more than just going for her number outright, as she’s already in "yes" mode while giving you the e-mail). As she's writing down her phone number say "Is this a number that you actually answer?" If she looks at you and hesitates, or says that it's her "voicemail or pager number," then say "Look, write your REAL number down. It's going to be OK, I'll only call you nine times a day." If the answer to the email question is "No, I don't have email" then bust on her and say "Well, do you have ELECTRICITY?" Then say "Well, OK then…I like email better, but just give me your number. It's so damn hard to reach people on the phone these days."

Here are some C&F ways to contact close:

"Let's do xxx together. I'll call you" (But you don't have my number) "Oh that's right!" (pull out a pen)

"You know what? I think I’ll make you my new girlfriend." (Uh... what?) "Yeah, I just decided that you’d make a nice girlfriend for me." (blah blah) "Ok, tell you what... I will make you my FAVORITE girlfriend. Give me your number." (if she won’t give it) "How can you be my favorite girlfriend if I don't even have your number?"

(If she accused you of trying to pick her up earlier) "Ok, now I’m OFFICIALLY picking you up. What’s your number?"

"Well... now that we've set up a meeting, there's a question you need to ask me." (What?) "Oh come on!" (What's your number?) "See I knew you'd catch on! Let's exchange numbers." "You can't leave...You haven't given me your phone number yet!"

(If things have gone really well) "So are you gonna give me your phone number, or do I have to stalk you?"

Pull out your cellular phone, and start looking it over curiously. "I wonder how this strange device can help us continue our conversation later. SURELY there must be a way…If only we could unlock its mysteries…"

Group number-close: The ultimate way to number close two or three or more women that are all beautiful and interesting is to say "You know, you guys are EQUALLY DORKY, so instead of just rejecting all of you, I'll let you all give me your numbers, and maybe we can hang out sometime...And I can teach you how to be cool like me"

If you suspect that she might have given you a fake number, when she gives it to you fluff-talk for about a minute or so. Then say "Okay I gotta go" and look at the number. Then say "Tell me your number again? Just to see if I’m reading it right" If what she gives you doesn’t match, it was bullshit! Call her on it, or even better, crumple it up and flick it at her, saying "Never mind, I don’t want it." Which is true, since you’re dealing with a flake anyway.

If she treats it like giving you her number was a big deal, you can say C&F

"Wow, I'm HONOURED to have been given your sacred trust...Your phone number is a sacred thing. I feel like someone has just given me their virginity."

Lastly, when you do the contact close, don't just trade numbers. Accompany it with a humorous "But when I call you, I don't want you to answer "Huh? Who? Ah… its you… uh… so… howzit going…" I want you to act really enthusiastic and happy, like "Oh, you called! God I'm so glad!!", ok? Is that a deal?" Additionally you can end the phone call in the same manner: "So when we meet, I want you to smile, give me a big warm friendly hug and take my hand. Deal?"

If she’s reluctant, or outright refuses to give you her number, you NEED to use C&F. You want to change her mood so that she relents. Here are some comebacks:

"Don’t worry! I’m only going to call you nine times a day. I’m not one of those CLINGY guys."

"What? You give your number to the pizza guy when you order a pizza, right?" (Of course) "Great. Give me your phone number and we'll order pizza together."

"Oh, C'mon! Lower you're standards a little. I did..." (Not the best line to use because it conveys lower social value, but a good last ditch effort)

Often a woman will ask for YOUR number instead. This is a brush-off because remember, women are PASSIVE and won’t call unless she’s really impressed by you (in which case she’d give you her number anyway, right?). Here are some rebuttals to "Why don’t you give me YOUR number?":

Direct: "Don’t give me that crap, give me your number."

"Look, I'm not that easy. Let’s EXCHANGE numbers."

(Give me YOUR number) "I know how you women are! You collect phone numbers and brag to your girlfriends about them and have little competitions and throw them away once you’ve had your ego boost." (No, not me, protest) "Okay, then prove me wrong and write down your number".

If she REALLY refuses to give out her number, proceed with one of the following:

"I'd still like to get to know you and I think you should get to know me before you pass judgment."

"Well now that I’ve gone to this much trouble the least you could do is talk with me on the phone."

Of course those two statements really set up a poor frame (that SHE’S the one giving YOU a chance), but they beat walking away with nothing. If this works to get her number, be sure to turn the frame around as soon as you can after you have the number.

If things have REALLY gone poorly and none of the above troubleshooters have worked, try this as a last-ditch effort:

"Just so it's not a total loss, do you have any cute and single friends who are available?"

For all you know, she may have an entire army of hot friends she could introduce you to. You could turn this "loss" into a huge potential gain!

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