Humor
Church Football
- THE OTHER SUNDAY SPORT:
QUARTERBACK SNEAK:
Church members quietly leaving during the invitation.
DRAW PLAY: What many
children do with the bulletin during worship.
HALF-TIME: The period
between Sunday School and worship when many choose to leave.
BENCHWARMER: Those
who do not sing, pray, work, or apparently do anything but sit.
BACKFIELD IN MOTION:
Making a trip to the back (restroom or water fountain) during the service.
STAYING IN THE POCKET:
What happens to a lot of money that should be given to the Lord's work.
TWO MINUTE WARNING:
The point at which you realize the sermon is almost over and begin to gather
up your children and belongings.
INSTANT REPLAY: The
preacher loses his notes and falls back on last week's Illustrations.
SUDDEN DEATH: What
happens to the attention span of the congregation if the preacher goes
"overtime."
TRAP: You're called
on to pray and are asleep.
END RUN: Getting out
of church quick, without speaking to any guest or fellow member.
FLEX DEFENSE: The ability
to allow absolutely nothing said during the sermon to affect your life.
HALFBACK OPTION: The
decision of 50% of the congregation not to return for the evening service.
BLITZ: The rush for
the restaurants following the closing prayer.
