It Must Be Summer
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| I developed a theory some time ago (yeah, had some time on my hands). Many people (maybe all of them) can be
stereotyped by a song. Probably not a coincidence, since people wrote those
songs... about people. Take me, for example; you can pretty much sum me up
with Led Zeppelin's Rock and Roll. You know, "It's been a long time since
I rock and rolled...." Hmm, perhaps that's saying too much.... Probably
more like Superman from The Kinks. Or Nobody's Fault But Mine
(let's not go there either, OK?). Ok, maybe people can be summed up by some small
number of song titles or lyrics then.... let's see how it plays out. I came up
with this theory when a friend of mine dropped out of sight for the summer, and
I first heard It Must Be Summer by Fountains of Wayne: "It must be
summer/'cause the days are long /and I dial your number/but you're gone, gone,
gone/So I called your sister/on the Jersey shore/she said you might be stopping
by/but she's just not sure/So I called your mother/on Long Island Sound/she
said it must be summer/'cause you're never around" Bill Clinton: Hmm, let's see here, can't be Ain't Misbehavin', that's pretty much a given. Didn't Bob Seeger (and the Silver Bullet Band, lest we forget) sing a song called The Fire Down Below or something like that back in the late '70s? It's not Mott the Hoople's Once Bitten Twice Shy either, although Bang a Gong by T. Rex has some potential. Or Zeppelin's Custard Pie. (Awww, this one is too easy) Reuben "Hurricane" Carter: I Fought the Law, and the Law Won. (Hey, I'm on the bus, we just passed Rahway; gimme a break here, you think it's easy to come up with original ideas?) Many of my colleagues at the failed start-up: Too Much Time on My Hands (Styx) (sorry guys) Al Gore: Too Much Time on My Hands (Styx). Aside from the obvious reference to time on his hands, the line "Is it any wonder I'm not the President?" just seems about right. I know there's also an R.E.M. song with the line "I demand a recount," as well, I just can't think of the name off-hand. George W. Bush: I'm Winning Osama Bin Laden: It's The End of the World As We Know It (R.E.M.) Michael Jordan: Back in the Saddle (Aerosmith) Ronald Reagan: Truckin' (Grateful Dead). You know, "what a long, strange trip it's been." Poor guy - I should be ashamed of myself. Alexander Haig: I'm the Man (Joe Jackson). You know: "I am in control" ? Ru Paul: Three Times a Lady (Lionel Ritchie). I loved the line from Chris Tucker in Rush Hour 2: "Lionel Ritchie? He ain't been black since the Commodores." Or, should it just be Lola (The Kinks)? Investment Bankers: Money (Pink Floyd). Hey, just kiddin' guys.... think I'll buy me a football team.... Donald Trump: I'm the Man (Joe Jackson). Or is it Money? Gotta be both. A former sales director from my start-up days: Casey Jones (Grateful Dead) (sorry, couldn't resist)
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