My Perceptions and Experience.
I have been involved with the ‘scene’ for the better part of 15 years. What I found is not quite what I had fantasized about. Reading poorly written pulp fiction had given me a false impression of the true nature of Power Exchange. I tend to use the term “Power Exchange”, because I think that best describes the act. I have had the opportunity to work with some very skilled individuals. Through their techniques and outlooks I have been able to develop my own style and approach, which is different than many. Having been a member of various clubs and societies, I have seen many different ‘flavors’ of power exchange. For many, the ‘scene’ itself is what they desire, others are into various aspects of pain, bondage or humiliation. Then there are the individuals who are seeking personal discovery. This is the facet I ended up so intrigued with.
I began as a bottom. I worked with both men and women; some good, others not so good. I found that the tops who used psychological techniques that enabled me to surrender were the one’s that I enjoyed sessions with the most. A combination of fear and trust opened pathways into my personality that I never knew. Of course, technique is a very important part of play, especially with the application of pain. After a few years as a bottom, I found that I wanted to try the other side and find out what it felt like to be the ‘facilitator’ so to speak. It was then that I found a true calling. I found early on that Kirsten was very dominant and her personality became a very strong presence in my life.
I have been interested and intrigued with shamanism and ‘holistic’ approaches to spirituality. I ended up very drawn to Celtic mythology. I think part of the attraction is genetic: I am Scottish/Irish. Be that as it may, I found the mythos rich in androgynous overtones and just resonated with my being. I began to see that the trance states discussed in many of my readings described much of what I had experienced as a bottom. I started seeing power exchange as a venue for spiritual growth through sexual energy. With this mindset, I found that my relationship with those I was working with was changing also. I found that ‘edge play’ was much more acute, do primarily to a deeper bond with the submissive. There was a deeper level of trust and just a much more powerful experience all around. Power exchange is a very potent venue for exploration of the self. The methods can take one beyond sexual arousal. It is also a very intense cleansing tool, allowing someone to release toxic energy stored in the body. I believe my approach is unique, but not original.
I hope this might provide insight those of you that are considering power exchange.
