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Issue Ten - 24/06/05 |
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Operation Dreadlock hailed as success by Gardai |
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Millstreet Garda Station today released a statement hailing the annual summer
solstice/Crustie round-up 'a roaring success'. A spokesman for the Gardai said,
"For years we were stumped as to an effective method of rounding up all the
Crusties into one spot, let's face it we don't like to work too hard around here. But
then someone had the brainwave of using this summer solstice thing to round them
up. You see they seem to gravitate towards the countryside on days like that to roll
around in muck licking each other or whatever it is they do. So anyway we decided
to use their own crustiness against them, clever eh?"
"We made up fake posters on the computer (Garda O'Halloran is a whizz with the auld Photoshop) inviting people to a summer solstice party in Menlo, complete with Crustie favourites like drumming and all that. And oh didn't they come, like little sheep to the slaughter. All we had to do then was pack them up into the Paddy Wagons and arrest them for vagrancies, disturbing the peace, disrespecting a Garda. Some may call it entrapment, but in this county we call it Operation Dreadlock. Now we can settle down to the more taxing business of dreaming up some trumped up charges for the worst agitators. I tell you, we may be good, but we've still a few things to learn from our colleagues in Donegal!" |
 Garda O'Halloran
- a whizz with Photoshop |