Straight from the Harly's mouth... again...

If The Newsies were Girls, Their Names Would Be...


Jack: So the obvious answer would be Jacqueline, eh? Well pointing out the obvious is my specialty, so, Jacqueline it is
David: Urma
Les: Bess
Race: Mrs. Ed – are you seeing a pattern here?
Mush: Chia, short for Chiquita or so he claims!
Blink: Pirette, lol!
Spot: Nanette
Crutchy: Gloria
Boots: Tina, as in, Tina Turner
Specs: Faruka
Bumlets: Juanita
Pie Eater: Woola
Dutchy: Blondie
Snipeshooter: Rosie
Itey: Erica
Swifty: Leela
Skittery: Elaine, definetely Elaine
Snoddy: Ddfaslkjfe (alien for Maria)
Snitch: Beavette
Jake: Rouge

If Our Newsies Were Plants:

Jack: Sun flower, ‘cause he’s obsessed with the sun
David: A purple pansy, there’s no other possibilities
Les: A weed, but not WEED
Race: Hay, no, it’s not a flower, but Mr. Ed eats hay
Mush: A big tree with a thick trunk
Blink: Something Pink…pink blink
Spot: A stinging nettle, but a small one, THE BROOKLYN FLOWER! *smiles at Southie*
Crutchy: That poor little flower by the driveway that somebody ran over
Boots: That boy is just not flower material…
Specs: One of those puffy things that people make wishes on
Bumlets: Black-Eyed Susan
Pie Eater: Once again, what in nature goes "Woo!"?
Dutchy: A dandelion
Snipeshooter: The fuzzy plant that sticks to your clothes
Itey: A potato
Swifty: A pwetty rose outside my window!
Skittery: A pea plant
Snoddy: Something that grows on Mars
Snitch: A tree that beavers gnaw on
Jake: Something red, like his nose

Most Absurd Mental Picture of the Newsies (Keeping it Clean!)

Jack: Falling off the horse during Santa Fe
David: In fuzzy bunny slippers
Les: Him being kicked from her to Timbuktu
Race: Him guest-starring on Mr. Ed
Mush: Bald, completely and utterly bald
Blink: Blink, with a little French moustache that curls on the ends
Spot: Spot, finding out no one’s really afraid of him
Crutchy: Attacking a poodle with his crutch, on accident of course
Boots: Screaming his heart out in an angry girl band
Specs: Specs, dancing with penguins at the North Pole
Bumlets: Whacking people on the head with his stick
Pie Eater: A large, talking banana (thanks Voodoo!)
Dutchy: Dutchy with a rainbow afro
Snipeshooter: Dancing on a Teddy-Graham commercial
Itey: In a silk Kimono and those neato wooden Japanese sandals
Swifty: I’ve already seen him in yellow hot-pants, you can’t top that
Skittery: A smile on his face as he frolics through a field of wild flowers with his golden retriever named Skip
Snoddy: "Take me to your leader…"
Snitch: Snitch with braces
Jake: Flexing his calves at the country fair

Again, we have more-age...