The Adventures of Paisley
Blue
Another late night for me... Here it is the 4th of January and I still have not heard from Hulk. I got a phone call from Mar today and she has seen him, spoken with him, so I know he is alive. Apparently he is raving about what a great time he had on New Year's Eve, how much fun we had, how much he loves me, etc. but like I told her, he hasn't bothered to call or email me. I am not happy about it.
Michael thinks Hulk just used me for a booty call. I really thought it was more than that. I don't know what to think anymore. Like I told Michael, I just don't think I'm going to trust any man again for a long, long time... except for him. I can trust Michael. He has proven that to me, over and over in different ways.
We did finally find out what happened to Mechanic. He is safe and alive. I won't go into anymore than that, though.
I feel very disjointed this evening. I feel restless inside. I'll tell you what I really feel like doing, and that's getting good and drunk. What purpose would that serve? Oh, I don't know... but I think it'd make me feel better.
Sometimes you just want to forget all your worries and laugh and have a good time. There's been so much going on, so many negative things, and I am not trying to worry about them... they just seem to pile up inside me. I'm not dwelling on any particular thing; it's just that I am conscious of them being there. Does that make sense?
The medication nurse increased the dosage of my antidepressant yesterday. Just in time, don't you think?
~Paisley Blue |
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