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The Adventures of Paisley
Blue
Life has certainly been eventful, but then, when isn't it? It's been strange not having Michael around but I also have to breathe a sigh of relief. The house is a lot quieter and more sane, and right now I really appreciate that.
We've been trying hard to fix up the extra vehicles so we can sell them. We don't seem to have trouble finding interested buyers. They just aren't interested in paying very much. We need to sell them for more than a hundred bucks each. For cars that run well, and have had their problems repaired, it's only right.
Work is going really well and I am constantly being reminded how lucky I am to have a job that is not only enjoyable but it is enough to live on. I mean, I do not have to work two jobs just to pay the rent. That's pretty cool. I'm hoping that when I get paid tomorrow I can afford to buy myself something, maybe a new blouse or perhaps some hair dye to cover this gray that's peeking through.
My first priority has to be filing for divorce, though. It's time. For many different reasons, I've got to put that part of my life behind me, in the past, where it belongs. I hope CB finds what he's looking for... I hope I do, too.
Sometimes it is hard to believe that this year has flown by so quickly but the years seem to do that faster and faster the older I get. It makes me think about what I have accomplished with my life, and what more I want to accomplish. I'm thinking a lot about what's important to me, and what's not. I'm thinking about how to do the things I really want to do.
Part of all this thinking I've been doing is examining the relationships in my life. Last night I had a deep discussion with Mechanic about life and things, and had to once again realize what kind of relationship we do and do not have. It is good to revisit that, at least for me, because it can get so confusing in my mind. I'm just glad he's so patient with me on this subject.
I still have hopes of one day being in another romantic relationship, but I'm not in a hurry to do so. As nice as it would be, I still need to figure some things out about myself, and also just enjoy being me... learning, doing, growing...
I could have never predicted all the things that happened to me this year, so there's no need to even try to do that for the coming year. I can only hope that it's a little more calm and sane than the last 12 months.
~Paisley Blue
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