Sept. 7, 2002
Bill Kenny lost his brave battle against west Nile Virus at 1 am Thursday, Sept., 5th. I join his family in mourning his loss. He was a wonderful man, so open, kind, loving, fun to be with. He was a major part of my life, and his absence can never be replaced. I can't put into words what Bill meant to me. Other than to say he was everything I'd ever wanted in a man, and hoped to find. Now he is gone...and life will never be the same.
Sept. 25, 2002
Tomorrow will be three weeks that Bill has been gone. It still seems like only yesterday. I've gotten over the feeling that it can't be real, and I've now settled in to the knowledge that Bill will be gone forever.
I've tried to be with other friends, but I keep finding myself wanting to be alone, or with Deb. She still is the only person whom I can be with, and not feel strange. She and I have tried on several occasions to be with other friends, but neither of us feels comfortable, and we seem to slip away alone.
I can't seem to find anything worth while anymore. Things that I've always enjoyed doing seem pointless and irrelevant to me now. I spend my days either wandering around the house, silent and depressed. Or sitting here on the computer playing solitaire wanting to be far from people. Even my Mom has said she wished I'd talk again, but I just can't think of anything to say anymore.
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