What's the difference between a drum machine and a drummer?
You only have to punch the information into the drum machine once.
What does a drummer use for contraception?
His personality!
What do Ginger Baker and 7-11 coffee have in common?
They both suck without Cream!
How many drummers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just one, so long as a roadie gets the ladder, sets it up and puts the bulb in the socket for him...
How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Twenty. One to hold the bulb, and nineteen to drink until the room spins.
If a dollar bill was laying in the center of a room, and the Easter Bunny, Santa Claus, a drummer with good time, and a
drummer with bad time were standing in the corners, who would get the money?
The drummer with bad time, because the other three don't exist!
What do you get if you cross a drummer with a gorilla?
A really dumb gorrilla!
Why is a drum machine better than a drummer?
Because it can keep a steady beat and won't sleep with your girlfriend.
Why are orchestra intermissions limited to 20 minutes?
So you don't have to retrain the drummers.
Why do keyboard players put drumsticks on the dash of their car?
So they can park in the handicapped spot.
What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A drummer.
How can you tell when a drummer is at your door?
The knocking speeds up.
How can you tell when a drummer is at your door?
He doesn't know when to come in...
"Why do you hang around with that drummer??"
"Beats me!"
Why a drum solo is just like a sneeze?
You can tell it's coming, but you can't do anything about it...
What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend?
Homeless.
What's the last thing a drummer says in a band?
"Hey, guys - why don't we try one of my songs???"
HOMEPAGE