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Q: How many Ayatollahs does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None-there weren't any light bulbs in the 13th century. Credit

Q: How many terrorists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Six. One to change the bulb, and 5 to take the credit when it explodes. Credit

Q: How many Republicans does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 12 to investigate Clinton's involvement in the failure of the old bulb; 23 to deregulate the lightbulb industry; 16 to cut funding for alternative lighting research and development; 34 to cut the tax rate on lightbulbs; 53 to design a block grant so the states can change the bulb; and 41 to talk with defense contractors about using night-vision gear instead. Credit

Q: How many Democrats does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: 24 to block the Clinton investigation, and 1 to fire a designated nominee; 46 to increase regulation the lightbulb industry, and investigate import balance; 32 to increase funding for alternative lighting research and development; 68 to increase the tax rate on lightbulbs; 106 to cancel the block grant to the states and create a federal Department of Light Bulb Investigations; and 82 to cancel the contract with defense contractors about everlasting light bulbs. Credit

Q: How many believable, competent, "just right for the job" presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: It's going to be a dark 4 years, isn't it? Credit

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A photo of NYC at the height of the power crisis.

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Lights Dim of Bush's Head


08/23/03 New York, PC - Republicans on the Hill are reiterating old words today, as the city of New York recovers from the most crippling blackout in years.

Spencer Abraham, the U.S. Secretary of Energy, said on Sunday's Meet The Press that the Bush Administration tried to prevent this from happening, and the "evildoers" (Later determined to be so-called 'Democrats') in Congress stopped the effort.

"If the American people had approved our plan to ravage the Alaskan Wildlife Reserve, build more coal power plants, and help pump millions of dollars into 3rd world dictatorships to bribe oil, this never would have happened."

Democrats responded by pointing out that their plan had called for a slightly smaller 'footprint', or impact, on the environment.

"When Bush gets an idea, the light bulb on top of his head simply isn't solar powered." Jennifer Granholm, the governor of Michigan, stated. "We can't agree with every environment killing plan that's out there! There's only so much time."

Upon further investigation, Politically Correct found that, in fact, smoke, smelling of sulfur, emits from the President's ears when an idea comes upon him.

"It's like the guy has the energy industry on his mind constantly." Reported a presidential aid who valued his life, and therefore did not wish his name to be published.

When questions arose Sunday about the President's own use of power, Powell responded, "Hey, being a politically conservative president doesn't mean being a energy conservative kind of guy."

"I've been telling Americans for years" President Bush stated from a wildlife tour in an undisclosed location, "when you get a lot of tinder down there, and you get a lot of heat, there's gonna be a fire!" Bush did not comment after being told he was not speaking of the blackouts, but instead the wildfires.

Laura Bush, however, responded to probing questions about her husband's ability to concentrate on the same concept for more than a minute with anger: "This issue isn't about who can concentrate! This is about power: Who was it, and who does not. At the moment, here in this undisclosed location, we have it."

While the bickering continues on both sides, here at PC, we've found a song to inspire all you New Yorkers without power. Click here to listen.