The Retarded Sheep's Guide to Doing Stuff

The Self Acclaimed Best Guide to Doing Stuff on the Web

Article 1: How to watch TV.

Step 1: Get a job.
Step 2: Get paid for it.
Step 3: Go to the store and buy a TV.
Step 4: Plug it in.
Step 5: Get comfy chair.
Step 6: Place chair in front of TV.
Step 7: Sit in chair.
Step 8: Open eyes.
Optional: If you want to actually see a picture on the TV, turn on power.

Article 2: How to drown.

Step 1: Find nearest beach
Step 2: Walk into water.
Step 3: Keep walking.
Step 4: Keep walking.
Step 5: Repeat steps 3 and 4 until you achieve results.
Warning: Do not attempt while wearing scuba equipment.

Article 3: How to eat spam.

Step 1: Buy Spam in a can.
Step 2: Open the Spam in a can.
Step 3: Send $5 to:
     The Retarded Sheep
     5555 Retarded Sheep RD.
     Sheepville, RS 99999
Step 4: Eat Spam.

Article 4: How to kick little kittens.

Step 1: You wanna what? Sick!

Article 5: How to sit on a shoe.

Step 1: Buy shoes.
Step 2: Throw away one of shoes, as they normally come in pairs.
Step 3: Put shoe on foot.
Step 4: Tie shoe (See guide to tying your left shoe)
Step 5: Untie shoe (See guide to untying your left shoe)
Step 6: Put shoe on chair.
Step 7: Sit on chair.
IMPORTANT: If you accidentally throw away left shoe instead of right shoe, switch words "left" with "right".

Article 6: Guide to tying your left Shoe.

Step 1: Have your brother do it.*

Article 7: Guide to untying your left Shoe.

Step 1: Have your brother do it.*

Article 8: Guide to tying your right Shoe.

Step 1: Have your brother do it.*

Article 9: Guide to untying your right Shoe.

Step 1: Have your brother do it.*
*If your brother is dead, non-existant or being killed at the moment, have you sister do it.

Article 10: How to press the 'Get your own Free Home Page' link.

Step 1: Grab mouse.
Step 2: Move mouse.
Step 3: Click on the link below.

This page hosted by Get your own Free Home Page

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