Pacey stood there, looking at her. Drinking in her presence. It had been a year since he'd last seen her. She hadn't changed much... she just looked sadder. More forlorn. He couldn't escape the thought, 'I did this to her, I caused this.' He was still staring at her when she spoke.

"Oh God, Pacey." It was more of a moan, barely a whisper, but he still heard it loud and clear and her words cut through him like a knife. In an instant she leapt off the boat and ran to embrace him.

He stood there shocked, disbelieving that she was there, in his arms. He had thought the day would never come. She felt so right. Familiar. And for a few moments he allowed himself to forget what happened and forget his part in the whole disaster and just enjoy holding her again. He buried his face in her hair, inhaling the scent and pulled her closer.

His heart was beating uncontrollably and his eyes were watery. This was Joey. Their Joey. He choked on his tears at the thought. She wasn't their Joey any more. She was just his . . . there was no one to share her with anymore. He searched within himself for the strength to do what he must. It was time to give her an explanation for his disappearance. To give her a reason, only he had none. At least none that atoned for the pain that leaving caused her. He wasn't ready for this confrontation yet, and he knew it. But none-the-less she was there and it was time.

They stood there like that for over ten minutes. Each reluctant to pull away and have to look one another in the eyes. Pacey feared what he would see there. Would it be anger, damnation, relief, sorrow, disgust?

Pacey finally pulled away from her. He couldn't handle the suspense. He needed to know what she was feeling. He needed to face up to the damage he felt he caused. He kept his eyes closed as he moved back, still not quite prepared to look her in the face. He mentally prepared himself for the worst and slowly opened his eyes to her.

He was completely unprepared for what he saw. She looked glad, almost happy to see him. Her eyes were gleaming from her tears, her entire face lit up from a smile. "You're back. You're really back!"

"I- I am."

"I missed you, Pacey."

"I missed you too, Jo . . . So much. So much that it was tearing me apart inside. A day didn't go by when I didn't think about you and Dawson."

At the reminder of his absence Joey became solemn again. She had been waiting a year to find out why he had left Capeside . . . why he had left her. And now he was there to answer. To explain why she had been forced to spend the past year alone with her pain. "Then why did you leave?" She asked him. The hurt shown naked on her face. He couldn't bear to see her that way and he turned away slightly.

"I see you've been working on the boat."

"Pacey, it's our boat, we were building it together. Pacey, we need to talk." She said stepping closer to him forcing him to look her in the eye.

"I can't Jo, I- I just can't, it's too soon."

"It's been a year Pacey."

"Not for me it hasn't."

"What do you mean?" She asked, not understanding his cryptic words. "Why did you leave?" She pleaded with him to explain why he had hurt her so much. Praying that he had a good reason for forcing the past year of her life to be torture. "Why did you leave us... why did you leave me?!"

"I left because- because I couldn't deal." He yelled stomping to the other side of the boat. "I left because I couldn't take the pain of losing him. Of possibly losing you. I lost Dawson and then you would leave me too."

"I wouldn't have left you, Pacey. I needed you to get through this!"

"You would have blamed me. Maybe not right away, but eventually." He continued quietly, his voice cracking from the emotion. "And because I couldn't stand seeing you day in and day out in so much agony because I took your best-friend, the love of your life, away from you."

"So you took it upon yourself to take my other best friend away?" She yelled back at him. "Do you know, Pacey, how hard it was to lose you both? To know that Dawson was gone forever and to never know if you'd return? If you were even alive still?" She continued to yell at him, and each word was a stab into his heart.

Pacey stood there numbly watching the angry tears fall down her face. Watching her yell at him, knowing he deserved every word.

"I waited Pacey... for days... for you to come back. I sat there on my porch everyday waiting for you to come back so we could finally get over losing our best friend together. I couldn't do it alone."

"Jack, Jen and Andie, they tried to help. But they didn't understand. They weren't there when we got lost in the woods when we were ten. They weren't there when we made our first movie, they weren't there when went to our first day of Kindergarten. They didn't understand what I was going through. Only you could.

"I needed you... and you deserted me. Left me alone. I never got over it, I'm still not over it!"

She didn't say anymore and Pacey took that as his signal to speak. "God, I know Joey. I know. I needed you too. I never forgave myself for-"

"You have nothing to feel guilty for! It wasn't your fault!" She interrupted him.

Pacey ignored her, nothing she could say would convince him that he wasn't to blame. "I came back because I want to fix things. I want the regrets and the pain and the guilt to go away. I don't want to live everyday feeling just as much pain as I did when I left. Time doesn't heal all wounds. I came back to heal my wounds... and the wounds I caused others.

"I'm back, Joey. And I'm not leaving again."

Joey stared back at him. A million emotions colliding inside her, leaving her heart in utter chaos. She spoke, clearly and quietly, her tangled emotions echoed in her words, "For the longest time, ever since you left, the only thing I hoped for was that you and Dawson would come back. Even though I knew he couldn't, I still wished for it." Pacey stood there, dread seeping into his veins. He feared what her next words would be.

"But I held out hope for you. Days went by and I waited for you. Weeks passed and still I believed you'd return, even when no one else thought you'd come back. Months passed and everyone thought I was crazy because I couldn't get over the death and disappearance of my two best friends. You know what comes next, Pacey? Years. A year passed," she uttered her next words, "and I gave up hope."

"Joey, please-"

"No! No, Pacey. It'll take more than apologies for me to forgive you." She began to cry again, in earnest now. "I needed you. And you walked away without looking back. "

"I can't forgive myself for leaving, Joey. And I don't expect you to either. Part of my reason for coming back was because I missed you. I missed Dawson, his death was ultimately what drove me away, but you . . . just knowing you were here, brought me back."

"Pacey, It's not enough." Joey cried, he went to her and tried to put his arms around her, but before he was given the chance, she pushed him away. "I ca- I can't do this now. Not- not today." She tried to wipe away the tears as she retreated backwards.

"I'm sorry, Joey," She turned and ran, he didn't follow. "I'm sorry," He continued at a whisper, "so damn sorry." He was left standing there next to the boat, alone, as the sun sank beneath the horizon.