Awe Full

When I was a little girl I dreamed
Of beauty and deep meaning in the world.
I thought that life would be profound
And simple and complex and awe full.

I'm beginning to understand that life is
Peeling oranges and unloading the dishwasher,
Smiling at the grocery store clerk and tipping your hat.

I cried when I thought I realized that
Beauty and meaning and simplicity and complexity
Were dreams of a freckled child.

I was jealous of that innocence, that love, that vision.
I wanted to find a way to get it all back,
I still wanted to dream that when I grew up it would be different.

But beauty is doing the laundry,
Deep meaning is clearing the table,
Profundity lies in vacuuming the floor,
Simplicity hangs in the closet,
Complexity knocks on the door.

Finding the awe in it all is the difficult part,
But trying keeps me alive.

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