The Tattoo author unknown Jim a coworker of mine is a young wild sort of guy. Every weekend he is off doing something with his friends. Skiing in the local mountains, taking the motorcycles to the desert, going to Laker games, etc. Rachel, his girlfriend of just about a year, is constantly harping on him to do something with her on the weekends. She is right of course, they have only been dating for a year and he is already acting like they have been married for two decades. When we have those buddy to buddy chats at work, I keep telling him to do something with her or at least occasionally do something special. He listens, but as soon as a friend calls with tickets to the Dodger game, or some other activity, off he goes. And he wonders why his girlfriend is always mad at him. He is a smooth talker and tries things like saying "but I thought you said it was okay if I went camping this weekend". Of course this never works, but he tries anyway. Last Friday he was telling me that he was planning to do something special. Rachel had driven home the fact that Sunday was their one year anniversary and he better not go out with his friends. Of course he was planning to go bar hoping with his friends Friday night, but he had made big plans for Sunday. He told me about the reservations at Guido's, the restaurant they went to on their first date, the gift he had bought, etc. I was surprised at this sudden change of character. Then he said "I'm going to get a tattoo with her name on it." I pointed out the pitfalls of such a thing. He thought it over and said he would come up with something else. Well Monday morning came by and I asked how the weekend went. "Great, until Sunday night" he replied. "What happened?" I asked. "Well Rachel was pretty mad about me going out Friday night. In fact she refused to see me Saturday. Sunday I convinced her to let me take her out for our anniversary." Jim told me. "Friday and Saturday I spent hanging with my friends. I got a little drunk and decided to get that tattoo I was talking about." "You didn't get her named tattooed on you did you?" I asked. "No. I knew you were right, so I got the words 'I love you' tattooed on my penis." "Your penis!? What ever for!?!" "Well I didn't want anyone to see my romantic tattoo" he sadly told me. "I figured only Rachel would see it there." I was stunned, I mean didn't that hurt? He told me he was too drunk to notice. Jim went on to tell me about the romantic dinner Sunday night, how happy Rachel was with the gift. The lovely time they had strolling along the beach and the romantic mood she was in when they returned to his house. "Then I got undressed" he said recalling the events. "I told her I had one more surprise and I showed her my tattoo. I was crushed when she said 'There you go again, trying to put words in my mouth'!" |
