Gender Reassignment Surgery (GRS) in Montreal on April 23, 2002 has got to have be the bravest, most courageous thing I have ever done in my entire life. What makes it so special is that finally my mind and body are one. No more closets, no more self-doubts. However, before I explain my experience in detail, I need to give you an overview of exactly how Dr Menard runs his hospital/residency. First off there are only about twelve doctors in the world who perform GRS. Dr Menard’s system is quite different then the other physicians because for the cost of the surgery you only spend 4 to 5 days in the hospital (17 bed facility) and the rest of the time, you are at his residency.
I arrived on a Friday (I should have been there on a Thursday but plane troubles delayed my arrival). When I arrived there were four women who had just come back from the hospital after having GRS the previous Monday and Tuesday. The point of having me arrive five days early is to see how women who have just had surgery react. From Friday through Monday evening, I talked to the four women, observed them and imagined how I would be just a few days later.
From Monday night through Friday afternoon I was in the hospital having my surgery while the four women I met over the past weekend went home.
When I returned to the residency on Friday afternoon there were four new pre-ops there who had just arrived and they in turn got to see how I reacted to the surgery. Then starting on Sunday evening they went to the hospital for their surgery and by Thursday of that week I went home.I liked Dr Menard’s system as it gives both pre and post-ops time to settle in and observe GRS first hand.
In the fourteen days I was there both Dr Menard and his partner Dr Bassard did 14 GRS operations for MTF and another 3 surgeries for FTM. In addition they did other surgeries such as breast implants and cosmetic works.
To say I got a lot of first hand information is correct. In addition I met a group of wonderful people, some with whom I will communicate with long after my operation.
Now here is a day-by-day description of my experience.
I’ll officially start my journal the afternoon I left work. At that point my one-month leave of absence from work began. The plan was to go home from work, finish packing, get a ride to the airport and then take off from Boston to Philadelphia to Montreal via US Airways.
Yes, that was the plan. Unfortunately it didn’t happen that way. I got to the airport OK only to discover that my connecting flight from Philadelphia to Montreal was canceled. I was able to rebook a flight for the next day but I was in a state of panic. You see that I was scheduled to meet Dr Menard on Friday afternoon and I was afraid that if I missed my appointment, the surgery would be rescheduled to a later date. I was very, very relieved after calling the residency in Montreal from the airport and talked to a very nice lady named Margaret who assured me that it would be OK to come on Friday and still met with Dr Menard later in the afternoon.
With that assurance I get a ride back home and had a restful nights sleep. I always figured that my backup plan was to get up at am and just drive the six hours to Montreal.
I got up at 6:30 and the first thing I didn’t see out my window were tree and grass. Today just happened to be the one day all year with dense fog (Why me? Why today?).
Anyway I went to the airport again (in the fog). I did check in although I had my suitcase searched (with my five stents in it), a baton went over my body and my shoes even went through the x-ray machine. However, I cleared the security check and the fog lifted enough for the flight to take off. Now I was on my way.
When I arrived in Montreal I was concerned about Canadian customs at the airport. However, in five minutes I breezed through both Immigration and Customs and even had time to pick up my check-in suitcase. There were absolutely no problems.
I called the Limo Service from the airport. They told me my driver was already at the airport waiting for me and then directed me to where he was waiting. Twenty minutes later I was at the residency.
Since starting my plane adventure on Thursday, I was very concern about meeting Dr Menard, however, when I arrived at the residency I was told he would met with me on Saturday. That was fine with me because now that I was at the residency all controls of my life for the next two weeks were in the hands of other people. I could relax and concentrate on my surgery.
I met by roommate, Debra, who would be staying with me for the next two weeks. We immediately became fast friends. We had so much in common that it was easy to get along with each other.
At dinnertime I met four other ladies, all post-ops who had just returned to the residency from the hospital. They were all in some degree of discomfort but the manner in which they acted was not nearly as awful as I had been lead to believe.
After dinner Debra and I went for a walk. It was a beautiful evening with the Montreal temperature in the 20C range (Little did I know this would be the warmest day I would have for the next two weeks). We walked and walked for over two hours. Just talking away. Twice we stooped for directions to a Catholic Church for Sunday and because Debra spoke French we kind of got some kind of directions. Although we never did find the church that night. We even had two guys offer us a rode but we declined their offer. A girl has to be careful.
Finally at the end of the day we watched a video on the residencies VCR.
At 10am Debra and I met with a beauty consultant to learn some tips on make-up, hair styling and even tattooing of the eyebrows, lips and eyes.
I was looking forward to meeting Dr Menard. He has been doing GRS since 1971 and is now 62. There was quite a bit of talk around the residency that he was looking for another surgeon to replace him. After that I waited around the residency until 3 o’clock when I met with Dr Menard. He looked older then his web site picture but I instantly took a liking to him, as he was very patient in answering my laundry list of questions. He answers were very clear and concise and I was very satisfied with what he told me. Since he has been doing this for thirty years I guess he knows his business. After nearly half an hour I ran out of questions.I was surprised that he didn’t want to exam me but I guess he will in detail next Tuesday. I had my picture taken with him and he told me he’d see me on Tuesday morning.
Later I went for another short walk and finally found the Catholic Church. After dinner it was time for more videos. There was a video of GRS but neither Debra nor I were the least bit interested in seeing it. I had complete confidence with Dr Menard and I didn’t feel a need to know what he was doing to do to me.
I took three walks today: the first one being to go to church. It was pretty obvious from the residency staff that there was not too many people that attending mass but I didn’t care, as church is an important part of my life.
My second walk of over two hours took me past a shopping center. I made my sole purchase in Canada – a $1.25 Pepper Mill. Just as I returned to the residency, one of the staff asked me if I was at the Flea Market. FLEA MARKET!! I love them and no I didn’t know about it. So she drive me to it although it was too late in the day to stop and besides I was a bit tired from my long walk. Oh well!
After dinner I took my last walk of the day. I felt that since I stooped running, walking was the least I should do to stay in some kind of shape. Besides except for meals and talking to the other girls there was nothing to do. Debra and I watch some more videos in the evening.
One day more. When I came to the breakfast table all four post-ops had already met with Dr. Bassard. He removed their stretches and packing. All four ladies were able too much more freely move about.
I did some paper work with the residency secretary and then began my final walk as a male. Debra came with me and we spent an hour and a half walking, talking and visiting stores.
There really wasn’t much else to do at the residency until 4 o’clock. That was the time Debra and I picked for our first of two enemas, Oh Boy!
After dinner Debra and I said our good-byes to the four post-ops and staff and at 7 PM we took off for the hospital. We were not officially patients in the hospital until Tuesday so after doing the admissions paper work we just stayed in our room and watched TV. We did however have to take a second enema of the day.
A nurse asked me if I wanted a sleeping pill but I was so relaxed that I declined.I had a very sound nights sleep.
Finally! After waking up at 6:30am, I washed, showered and met my anesthetist. He laugh when I asked him to see how far down from one hundred I could count before stopping once he anesthetized me. I guess they only do that in the movies.
At 7:15 I was wheeled into the OR and again met and talked to the anesthesiologist until Dr Menard arrived. Once I greeted him a needle was put in my arm and I didn’t remember a thing until 3 or 4 in the afternoon. I was very drowsy, I felt like my mind was alert but my speech was sluggish. The rest of the day and night I just kept drifting in and out of sleep. Thank God for morphine. This wonderful medicine greatly helped me easy the discomfort. I was never in pain but clearly in much discomfort. Dr Menard stopped by to see if I was doing OK.
The very best news I heard all the time that I was in the hospital was when a Nurse came in Wednesday morning to change my wrapping and told me I had no swelling on either side of my upper thighs and lower abdominal areas. This meant that with no swelling the recovery period would be quicker and easier.
The very worst news I had also occurred on Wednesday. All my life I know that I had blood pressure on the low side of normal. It never was a problem until I started to have morphine shots. The combination of the two things reduced my blood pressure to a level that by nighttime that day a Nurse refused to give me any more morphine shots. I insisted that I needed some kind of painkiller and finally I got a small dose.
At around 8:30pm I was allowed to get out of bed for the first time since surgery. I made a big trip from the bed to a chair and then back in bed again. Total distance 5 feet!
By late in the day I was getting irritated with the ice packs and wanted to have them stopped. But the Nurse kept giving them to me every four hours because it was “procedure.”
I was afraid to eat much all day because I felt that the combination of food and medication might make me sick to my stomach. This didn’t happened luckily.
Dr Menard came in twice during the day to check up on me. I couldn’t help but brag to him that I had no swelling. He was very pleased.
Today I got up out of bed and was free to start walking around the hospital, I was even able to sit in a chair (with the assistance of a donut) and watch TV or read. I was a little wobbly in the morning but by the afternoon I felt almost normal.
I was really amazed at how well I felt. Dr Menard again came in to visit me twice during the day. When I asked him why I was feeling so good he did not really have an explanation but said a lot of recovery is in the mind.
My appetite returned as I eat all three meals that were served including steak and french fries in the evening.
This was discharge day. I had my first shower and shampoo since early Tuesday morning. It felt so good!
Dr Menard has now seen me six times since surgery. Today he cut my outer stitches. He would be doing the rest on Monday and in the days between I’d be in some discomfort.
Dr Menard drove me back to the residency. There a Nurse told me how to keep the wound clean until Monday.
There were four new pre-ops at the residency. I met them and started to found out a little about them.
Debra is still my roommate but we pretty much keep to ourselves.
NOTE: I was so very pleased with my surgery and recovery. I attribute it all to my 26 years of running, my legs and body were in excellent shape thus after surgery I had no swelling and no bleeding. Each day I felt almost my old self. Once all the stitches are removed I feel I’ll go back to being my old self.
I had a good nights sleep but I had this strange feeling that I’ve done this before. I don’t know whom but all this seems so very familiar.
With internal stitches and packing, there is really nothing to do except eat, talk, read and watch TV. Last weekend I was very active and walked so much. This weekend I couldn’t leave the residency while all the new pre-ops left to visit downtown Montreal. This isn’t fair but then again this isn’t a vacation.
Pills. Last night I was a smart aleck and did not bother taking any sleeping pills or painkillers. Well that didn’t work and by 2:30am I was up looking for the night nurse to administer some pills. That was the last time I’ll go without pills for a while.
Today pretty much was a repeat of yesterday except in the afternoon it snowed. I couldn’t resist going outside in the snow.
Four new post-ops arrived from the hospital in the afternoon and I began to get to know then and hear their stories.
Tonight two pre-ops who I met on Friday left to go to the hospital for their surgery. I think it’s sad to see girls you got to meet and know (however briefly) leave the residency. Chances are you might not ever see them again.
Dr Menard visited me at 6:30 AM, in less than a minute he cutting the final stitches and was therefore able to release the packing that was in my vagina. I felt no pain. After a brief exam in which he told me that everything was fine, he was gone.
Around 9:30 am, a Nurse came to visit me and instruct me on how to go about doing my first dilation. I started to take written notes but she quickly told me just listen to her and later she would give me written instructions. She showed me how to lubricate a stent and put it into my vagina at the proper angle. I used three different stents over a 23-minute period. I then douche, took a bath and was then completed with my first ever dilation.
During the first day I dilated three more times. Right from the beginning I didn’t mind dilation. I already knew it was an importance post-op procedure so I took it very seriously and was totally committed.
At 6 am I began my first of five dilations. The entire process including a bath, douche and washing took about an hour and fifteen minutes. It seems like a long time and maybe I can cut down the time after I get into the swing of things.
US Air called to tell me that my Thursday flight was changed until later in the afternoon.
Today I walked outside three times. I took baby steps all the way and went about a third of a mile. I felt pretty good./p>
The dilation process seems to be going very well. A Nurse came by for a visit and suggested I skip the first stent but I didn’t want to break the regiment at least until I got home. Dr Menard also came by. He seemed pleased when I told him about my three walks.
The final day of five dilations per day. The written material that I received was, to my way of thinking, not very clear and easy to follow. So I spent half of the morning with two other ladies trying to fit the dilation schedule I received into a more logical sequence. I failed! So I asked one of the Nurses to help me. Together we kinda got it the way I could follow in an orderly fashion.
I went for one long walk of about half a mile. It probably was a bit too far as it took me two hours to recover. In hindsight the walk of this length was not a good idea as it was just too far to go so soon after surgery. When I told the Nurse what I did, she was not happy. Luckily everything inside me was OK.
I noticed a little blood around the area of my stitches after douching in the morning. It had no effect on my dilation but still it concerned me. Fortunately Dr Menard came by and after I told him about the blood and showed him the area, he said it was not a problem as long as I take my two baths daily.
I can’t tell you how much it means to me that Dr Menard came by so often at the residency to check up on me. I thought that after he removed my stitches on Monday, I would never see him again but I saw him three times since Monday. His final words to me after seeing me Thursday early afternoon were, “keep up the athletics.” This to me meant that he remembered that I was a runner and he wanted me to continue running. I cried a little at the thought that he remembered me and how important running was to me.
Finally at 2:40 pm the limo arrived at the residents and I left to go to the airport.
I have very mixed emotions about leaving. Because I am an active person, I was bored to death with not being able to doing things outside of the residence (except walking). However, I met some absolutely wonderful women that I will remember for the rest of my life. The staff, the food and the facilities were all great.
Overall it was a wonderful experience that I hoped you enjoyed reading.